Successful Pirate Jokes
5 successful pirate jokes and hilarious successful pirate puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about successful pirate that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Cheeky Successful Pirate Jokes to Experience Good Cheer & Frivolity
What is a good successful pirate joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
The Secret of the Red Shirt
Once upon a time there was a pirate captain. He ran a very successful ship, and rarely lost any battles. He took a boy under him to teach him the trade.
One day, the lookout shouted, "Marine ship to the starboard, bearing down upon us!". The captain immediately shouted to the boy, "Boy, bring me my red shirt!". The ship was boarded, but the captain rallied the pirates and defeated the marines.
Every time a marine ship attacked them, the captain would give the same order to the boy, "Boy, bring me my red shirt!". And they always won. So, one day the boy asked the captain, "What is the secret of the red shirt?". The captain replied, "The secret is that, if I'm injured in the battle, the crew won't see blood and will not falter." The boy was amazed and grew proud about his captain.
Then one day, the came upon an entire fleet of marine ships. Hundreds upon hundreds of marine ships bore down upon them. The boy came running to the captain with the red shirt. The captain shook his head and said, "Bring me my brown pants."
What's a pirate's favorite letter?
Not, not "Argh." Too obvious.
Not the "C" either. Everyone has heard that one.
"Without a P he's irate hahahahaha!" Blah blah blah. Nope.
Give up?
A letter of marque. It makes his profession semi legitimate, provides for a legal way to store his wealth in his homeland, and allows him to attain social prestige far above his station if successful enough.
Now you know, and knowing is half the battle.
TIL The most successful pirate captain ever was a Chinese p**... who controlled 1,500 ships and had over 80,000 sailors working for her
I bet she knew how to handle s**....
What did the pirate say after his successful pillage?
Thanks for the gold kind stranger!
Old but gold, Captain Jack Arrow.
Jack Arrow was a captain of a pirate ship. He was always chased by danger. As one day, a crew member came up to captain jack and said " We got an enemy ship approaching us from behind, sir!!!" Captain Jack, with all confidence, replied "Bring me my red shirt!". As the enemy ship boarded Captain Jack's ship, a battle initiated, and it went successfully for Captain Jack's side as not a single crew member of his lost their live. After the battle, the crew member approached Captain Jack, "Sir, why did you ask me to bring your shirt? and why specifically 'red'?" the crew member asked. Captain Jack, with a smile on his face, replied "So that in case I get wounded in battle, my crew would continue to fight!". The very next morning, the same crew member came up to Captain Jack with t**... on his face "Sir! we have TEN enemy ships approaching us from behind, sir!!!". Captain Jack, stared dead serious at his face, then screamed "BRING ME MY BROWN PANTS!"
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