Following is our collection of funny Stuck Traffic jokes. There are some stuck traffic jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these stuck traffic puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Apparently, anything doesn't include getting stuck in traffic.
The traffic is stopped for miles ahead.
Another man walks up next to him and says, "Sir, terrorists have kidnapped every member of congress. If they don't get $100,000,000 in ransom, they will to cover them in gasoline and burn them. I'm here to collect donations."
The man asks, "how much do most people donate?"
"About a gallon."
He sees a foreign man is coming towards him. Foreign man comes and says:
– Terrorists captured Trump, we are collecting donations. If $10.000.000 hasn't given in 1 hour, they will burn him with gasoline.
– How much people donate usually?
– Around 5 gallons.
Suddenly, a man knocks on the window.
The driver rolls down the window and asks,"What's going on?"
"Terrorists have kidnapped all the politicians , and they're asking for a $100 million dollar ransom.
Otherwise, they're going to douse them all in petrol and set them on fire. We're going from car to car, collecting donations".
"How much is everyone giving, on an average?" the driver asks...
The man replies, "Roughly 2 litres."
A driver was stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside Washington, DC.
Nothing was moving.
Suddenly, a man knocks on the window. The driver rolls down the window and asks, "What's going on?"
"Terrorists have kidnapped the entire US Congress, and they're asking for a $100 million dollar ransom. Otherwise, they are going to douse them all in gasoline and set them on fire."
"We are going from car to car, collecting donations."
"How much is everyone giving, on an average?" the driver asks.
The man replies, "Roughly a gallon."
After waiting 20 minutes with little movement, he decides to catch up on his homework. 5 Minutes in, he feels thirsty and realizes he has an unopened bottle of Coke in his backpack. He takes it out and opens it. However, as soon as he takes his first sip, a nearby police car start flashing it's lights and orders him to pull over to the side. When the cop reaches his car, the student asks:
"What am I being stopped for?"
The cop answers:
"Drinking and deriving."
She said, "I'm turning round."
"I can see that," I replied. "Try eating less chocolate."
A cop pulls a car over for driving too fast. He walks up to the car,
Cop: You were going to fast.
Driver: I was just trying to keep up with traffic.
Cop: There isn't any.
Driver: I know! That's how far behind I am!
He would have started sooner, but he was stuck in traffic.
Mufasa
The first kid asks, Why am I named Kitchen Table? His mom says, Well sweetie, when you were born the car was out of gas and we couldn't get to the hospital, so you were born on the kitchen table.
The second kid asks, Why am I named Backseat? Her mom says, Well honey, when *you* were born, we got stuck in traffic on the way to the hospital, and you were born in the backseat of the car.
The third kid says, That's neat. But mom, why am I the only one with a normal name?
His mom just says, I wouldn't worry about it too much, John.
You can explore stuck traffic reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean stuck traffic dad jokes. There are also stuck traffic puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
But so did everyone else because they saw it on Google Maps and now we're all stuck in traffic. -Robert Frost
A: A PearlJam 😃
Exclaimed the Italian stuck in traffic.
it wasn't the greatest car in the whole world. It was just a Tribute.
Edward Jack gets a job at an average-paying office. He's popular among his co-workers, and his boss who speaks rough english. He fired a guy buy saying, You no job good! Since the boss can't pronounce Edward well, he calls him E. Jack.
One day Edward woke up late, got stuck in traffic, and was late to work. He got yelled at by his boss who said, E. JACK! YOU LATE!
He gets stuck in traffic. So he calls his wife and says "Honey, im stuck in traffic right now, and it doesn't look like it wil be clearing up anytime soon. Im probably gonna be late." So the wife says, "Ok, baby, but be careful. I heard on the news that there is a crazy driver driving on the wrong side of the freeway." The man replies: "One driver? There are hundreds of them!"
some guy came and knocked on his windows and said "Donald Trump has been kidnapped, the kidnappers ask for 1 billion dollars or they will burn him with gasoline , we're asking for donation "
So the man in the car asked and on average how much does a person donate?
so the guy replies "between one gallon and two gallons "
none because sheep cant drive!! hahahaha
Even if you're stuck in traffic, you're still moving.
Cork was in a bottleneck.
So I said it's probably stuck in traffic.
Today I found out, apparently "anything" does not include getting stuck in a traffic jam.
Apparently 'anything' doesn't mean being stuck in traffic
Apperently stuck in traffic isn't part of "anything".
They BEARly MOOOOOve!
I get stuck in sex traffic for hours
It's a Slow Jam.
...you're stuck in it because of an accident.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the stuck traffic jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working stuck traffic piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.