The Best 22 Stub Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Stub jokes. There are some stub projector jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these stub scratcher puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Stub Jokes and Puns
A kinky passenger grinningly exposed himself to a stewardess as he boarded the plane.
"I'm sorry," said the woman, "but you'll have to show me your ticket, not your stub."
Ticket Please
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket, instead he opened his trench coat and flashed her.
Without missing a beat....she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."
Why do cowboys always want to die with their boots on?
So they don't stub their toes when they kick the bucket.
I wanted to learn about amputees on Wikipedia
But I didn't learn much, because the article was a stub.
I stubbed my toe and got scolded by my parents for yelling What the duck
They were angry that I used fowl language
Can't move your toe after a bad stub?
No problem, just call a toetruck.
A stubborn chicken
There was once a stubborn chicken at Mr. Wiley's farm who always used to find ways to escape out the back.
Mr. Wiley decided to put a fence around chicken house, but being a stubborn chicken, he still managed to escape out the back.
Then Mr. Wiley decided to put it in a cage. But chicken, being stubborn still managed to escape out the back.
Frustrated, Mr. Wiley killed it, cooked it and finally ate it. But the chicken was stubborn. He still managed to escape out the back.
What did the stubborn Hindu in Pakistan say after partition?
Na-ama-ste
I said some stubtly racist stuff to a magpie
She was a victim of my crow aggressions.
If you're a movie ticket usher and .......
.... and amputee leaves the theater, but comes back and shows you his ticket, is it wrong to say to him "I'm glad you saved your stub" ?
There was once a very stubborn man who never learned how to swim...
They say he died in denial.
You can explore stub paychecks reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean stub ids dad jokes. There are also stub puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
I hate it when I stub my toe while rapping
Gucci-dang
I'm stubborn, I think it's a good trait.
Others don't agree with me. They're wrong.
Airport
Flight attendant was waiting at the gate for passengers when a man walked up to her. She said "sir, I need to see your ticket" the man then opened his trench coat and flashed her. The flight attendent then said. "sir. I said ticket. Not stub!"
TIFU by accidentally ramming my toe against the cigarette urn while I was trying to throw my cigarette away.
Oops, wrong stub.
What did ZZ Top say when they stub their toe?
Oh ow ow ow
Just saw that new Harry Potter movie, and was really disappointed...
...just looked at my ticket stub. It turns out the movie is called fantastic *beasts* and where to find them.
A libertarian prostitute looks at her pay stub..
"I'm sick of all these fucking-taxes"
My parking stub was being bitchy, argumentative, and expensive.
It just wanted validation.
Did you hear about the casino croupier whose hand, through a tragic accident, was reduced to a stub?
Don't worry, he's dealing with it.
What did the stubborn, fabric-bound book say to the leather books?
I will not be suede!
Stubbing my toe
Me: Ow, that hurts
Sister: What's wrong?
Me: Mitosis
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the stub cigaret jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working stub rogue piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.