Stroking Jokes
36 stroking jokes and hilarious stroking puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about stroking that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Stroking Short Jokes
Short stroking jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The stroking humour may include short rubbing jokes also.
- Woman is at a maternity hospital in a lot of pain. Her husband strokes her back and says, "I'm sorry sweety, you have to go through this"
She says, "Don't worry. It's not your fault." - Why do old people like golf? Just like in their life, the goal is to get the least amount of strokes before you go in the hole
- The baby Woman at a maternity hospital is in a lot of pain, moaning. The man strokes her back, I'm so sorry sweetheart that you have to endure this…
Don't worry Steve, it's not your fault. - What do you call a black man who dies of heat exhaustion and a white guy that dies of a brain aneurysm? Different Strokes
- What do vaginas and row boats have in common? Both can't get anywhere without a few strokes
- Did you hear about the painter who was hospitalized? The doctors say it was due to too many strokes.
- Why did the golfers wife call for help when he hit the ball out of bounds? Because he stroked out!
- As far as I know original golf joke So what does a bogey have in common with a dead golfer?
One too many strokes. - The person ahead of us today in mini golf completed the course in 23 strokes. I hope they're okay.
- If a person dies after suffering an average number of strokes for their age did they make par?
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Stroking One Liners
Which stroking one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with stroking? I can suggest the ones about petting and slapping.
- Why did the ska guitarist take twice as long to fap? He only knows up strokes
- What does rock music and my grandpa have in common? The Strokes
- My nursing home golf team won again... We had the least amount of strokes!
- What band do elderly people try to avoid? The Strokes
- Why do artists die early in life? Too many strokes.
- Did you hear about the golfer who passed away? He had two strokes over 80.
- Have you ever stroked a parrot? I bet you've stroked a cockatoo...
- Life is like golf The less strokes, the better
- What do you do in case of fallout? Put it back in and take shorter strokes.
- Life is a little bit like golf. You want to finish with as few strokes as possible.
- My grandmother recently had 2 strokes Best golf game of her life
- Life is a lot like a game of golf... Too many strokes and you loose.
- Dates are like golf strokes The fewer it takes for you to score, the better your game.
- Q: What do you call a rock band with heart disease? A: The Strokes
- What do you call a series of short strokes induced by consuming pizza? Little Seizures
Rib-Tickling Stroking Jokes that Bring Friends Together
What funny jokes about stroking you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean patted jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make stroking pranks.
The doctor tells me I can play with myself whenever I like
My wife tells me that's not what 'You could have a s**... at any moment ' means
If a woman drinks two glasses of wine a day, it increases the chances of a s**... by 50%
Let her finish the bottle and she'll probably s**... it as well.
Doctors have confirmed that m**... is life threatening
Many men have died after having a s**...
Two nuns
Two nuns are sitting on a bench. A guy in a trench coat comes up and flashes them. One of the nuns has a s**.... The other couldn't quite reach.
I got kicked out of the hospital.
Apparently, the sign "s**... patients here" meant something totally different.
Here is an actual sign posted in a golf club.
1. Back straight, knees bent.
2. Feet shoulder width apart.
3. Form a loose grip.
4. Keep your head down!
5. Stay out of the water.
6. Try not to hit anyone.
7. If you are taking too long, let others go ahead of you.
8. Don't stand directly in front of others.
9. Quiet please while others are preparing.
10. Don't take extra strokes.
Well done. Now, flush the u**... and go outside and tee off.
My girlfriend's dog came running up to us for a cuddle.
"I love you Freddy," she said, s**... his fur.
"I love him more than you," I replied.
She said, "I don't think so, I definitely love him most."
I said, "You misunderstood me."
How do you get 4 old ladies to yell "s**...!"?
Get a 5th old lady to yell "Bingo!"
3 Old Women and a f**...
Three old women are sitting on a park bench when a man
comes by and flashes them.
Two of them have a s**..., and the third one couldn't
reach.
Three old ladies are sitting on a park bench...
A man wearing a long raincoat approaches, opens it and flashes them.
Two of the ladies immediately have a s**.... The third couldn't reach.
Studies find if a woman has a glass of wine a day increases the chances of a s**....
If you let her have more she might s**... it too.
My grandma caught me m**... and she had a s**......
She has such soft hands...
What is the difference between a joe Biden speech and a Donald Trump speech?
When Biden is speaking you wonder if he's had a s**....
When Trump is speaking you wonder if you've had a s**....
Two old ladies are sitting on a park bench
A man walks up in a trenchcoat and flashes them. The first lady has a s**..., the second lady couldn't quite reach.
Golf is like urinating in a public toilet
- Keep your back straight
- knees bent.
- Feet shoulder width apart.
- Form a loose Grip
- keep your head down
- avoid a quick backswing
- stay out of the water
- try not to hit anybody
- if you taking too long you should let others go ahead of you
- you shouldn't stand directly in front of others
- be quite when others are about to go
- keep strokes to a minimum
My grandfather had a s**... this week..
He saw a picture of my grandmother when she was younger and couldn't help himself.
I got a h**... from Albert Einstein the other day...
It was a s**... of genius
Three Little Old Ladies
Three little old ladies were at the bus stop in front of their church when a young man ran up to them and exposed himself. The oldest one had a s**.... The other two couldn't reach.
[nsfw] What do you call it when a leprechaun gives you a h**...?
A s**... of luck
I walked past a boy sitting on the steps of the local YMCA s**... a large, white feather.
I said "Young man, there's no need to feel down"
Just got back from the doctor... he said I can touch myself inappropriately whenever I want to!
Wife: Grabs report "This says you could have a s**... at any time"
