The Best 62 Stripper Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Stripper jokes. There are some stripper waitress jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these stripper burlesque puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Stripper Jokes and Puns

What do you call a Poor Stripper?

Ugly.

My mom really only sends the classiest of FWDs

A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him.
She says hello. He's rather taken a back because he can't place where he knows her.
So he says, "Do you know me?"
To which she replies, "I think you're the father of one of my kids."
Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife, and he says,
"Oh, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I did on the pool table with all my buddies
watching while your partner whipped me with wet celery?"
The woman looks sternly into his eyes and says very calmly, "No, I'm your son's teacher."

I would have been a stripper...

...but I just couldn't pull it off.

Follow the format; go!

Stripper joke, I would have been a stripper...

How much does a midget stripper with three kids get paid?

Mini-mom wage.

Four old guys go golfing...

And they start bragging about their sons.

The first says "My son is a lawyer, and he is doing so well, he just gave his friend a new car!"

The second says "My son is a doctor, and he is doing so well he just bought his friend a new boat!"

The third guy says "My son is an executive, and he is doing so well he just bought his friend a new house!"

The fourth guy says "Well, my son is a stripper at a gay club, but he must be doing pretty well because he just got a new car, a new boat, and a new house..."


MΓΆbius strippers...

never show their backside.

What do liquid Draino and a Dutch stripper have in common?

They both slowly remove clogs.

I'll see myself out... Hey, at least it was original.
Thanks for the gold !

Stripper joke, What do liquid Draino and a Dutch stripper have in common?

How are strippers like giants?

they both grind bones to make bread.

Being a stripper is like working at McDonald's....

Covered in oil and questioning your choices after high school.

My wife told me she wanted the body of a stripper.

But she screamed when I brought her one.

Mr. Peanut was arrested for drunk and disorderly at a local Strip Club

The arresting officer said it wasn't the first time he'd busted a nut in front of a stripper and it wouldn't be the last.

You can explore stripper vag reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean stripper bartender dad jokes. There are also stripper puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


A man walks into a bar and sees a plus sized stripper dancing on a table..

He tells her, "Nice legs!"

"Wow, you really think so?"

"Definitely," he replies, "most tables would have collapsed for sure."

Dating a stripper is like eating a bag of chips in class.

Everyone looks at you in disgust. But deep down they want some too

Johnny was in class one day...

and the teacher was asking everyone what their parents do. One said her dad was a firefighter, another said his mom was a nurse. When the teach asked Johnny what his dad does Johnny said "Well my dad is a stripper in a gay bar, and if the guy looks good and the money is right he'll have sex with him out back in the alley." The teacher asked everyone to take their seats and sit quietly, then asked Johnny to step into the hall. She asked Johnny if his dad was really a stripper in a gay bar and Johnny said "Absolutely not. He's the quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys, but I was too embarrassed to say that."

Where do strippers go on holiday ?

Poland

Whats the difference between the government and a stripper?

Strippers don't rig their polls.

Stripper joke, Whats the difference between the government and a stripper?

Why do strippers look better in the club than outside the club?

Black lights matter.

Why did the stripper need more insurance?

She had little to no coverage.

Dating a stripper is like eating a noisy bag of chips in church.....

They all look at you with disgust, but deep down, you know they want some, too.


You know you're old...

When your stripper has braces and you're wondering how much her parents paid for them.

It's Jim's birthday

Jim's wife treats her man by taking him to a Strip Club for his birthday... At The Club, The Doorman Says, "Hey Jimmy, How are You?" The wife asks, "How does he know you? Jimmy says, "Oh dear, I play football with him." Inside the Bartender Says, "The Usual, Jim?" Jimmy says to Wife, "Before you say anything, He's on the Darts Team." Next a stripper Says, "Hi Jim! Do You Crave the Special Again??" The wife storms out dragging Jimmy with her & jumps into a taxi... The Taxi driver Says, "Hey Jimmy Boy! You picked up an ugly one this time...."

What does a stripper eat for thanksgiving dinner?

Twerky

My credit card is like a stripper.

There isn't much on it.

I got a private dance from a stripper.

When she was done, she gave me her phone number.

I said, "If I give you Β£50, will you come back to my place for a kiss and a cuddle?"

She said, "It will have to be more than that."

I said, "That's fine. What about sex?"

What do you call a stripper who fell down?

A Hoedown.

What does a stripper and a guitar have in common?

The G-String is always going off.

Grandpa's Birthday

So my grandfather turned 90 last weekend, and my uncle, the class act that he is, thought it'd be a good idea to get a stripper one night, after we had the guys golf trip.

So she shows up, it's a bit awkward at first, but she's affable and it makes it a slightly better situation.

Eventually she goes up to the birthday boy and asks him "Do you want a super lapdance?"

Grandpa thought long and hard and finally spoke up, "I guess I'll have the soup!"

Dating a stripper is like opening a bag of chips in church

eveybody looks at you in disgust but deep inside they all want some.

Strippers in Houston must be doing great.

Because they're making it rain.

Chad's wife decided to surprise him on his birthday

and to show him that she's a cool wife, she took him to a strip club.

At the club:

Bouncer: Hi Chad! How you doing tonight?

Wife: How does he know you?

Chad: We play golf together!

Bartender: Evening Chad! The usual?

Wife: And how does he know you?!

Chad: Um, he's on the bowling team!

Hot blonde stripper: Hey sexy, champagne room again tonight?

At this point the wife loses it and storms out of the club, dragging Chad with her, into a taxi.

Taxi driver: Hey Chad! Boy... You picked a fat one tonight huh? Same motel?

42% of strippers are working their way through college

According to the latest pole

What do you call a stripper without legs?

A night crawler.

What do you call a 350-pound stripper?

Broke.

3 men in a bar talking about there sons

The first man says my son is doing so well he just got a job as a doctor and just bought his girlfriend a new car.

The next man says my son is an engineer and he just took his girlfriend to the Bahamas.

The third guy says my son is a male stripper. One of his boyfriends just bought him a car and went to the Bahamas with the other one.

How does one become a level 99 stripper?

A lot of grinding.

Jack the Ripper's reasons for killing hookers was pretty understandable.

They wouldn't accept him into their ranks as Jack the Stripper.

A friend of mine used to be a stripper but she got bored with it.

It's always the same old thong and dance.

What do you call a stripper with a spear?

A pole lancer

My friend is a male stripper. He hates his job and wants to quit, but the pay is too good.

So he decided to stick it out for a little longer.

I bought my wife a stripper pole for our anniversary and installed it in our bedroom.

Whenever I ask her if she likes it, she just dances around the subject.

The stripper got an abortion

It was like taking baby from a Candy

What are strippers doing during quarantine?

Twerking from home.

A teacher is teaching a 5th grade class on Zoom.

The teacher says to Susie, "Tell the class why you want to be a teacher."

Susie says, "Actually, I want to be a stripper."

The teacher asks, "A stripper? I thought you wanted to do my noble profession."

Susie says, "That was before I saw your tiny apartment."

What's it called when a stripper and a tattoo artist trade services?

Tit for tat.

Do you know the similarities between a stripper and a rock?

You skip the flat ones

What do strippers and presidential candidates have in common?

They both go up and down polls

Strippers don't have air conditioning in their homes.

............Onlyfans

Strippers don't have air conditioning in their homes

OnlyFans

How did the stripper know she was the most popular dancer at the club?

She took a poll.

Today is Jacob's birthday,

So his wife decided to surprise him, she took him to a Strip-Club House.

At the club -

DOORMAN: Hey Jacob! How are you?

WIFE: How does he know you?

Jacob: We play Golf together!

BARTENDER: The usual beer Jacob?

WIFE: And how does he know you?

Jacob: He's on the Bowling Team!

HOT STRIPPER: The special Lap Dance again, Jacob?

The Wife storms out...... dragging Jacob with her, into a taxi!

TAXI DRIVER: Hey Jacob boy....You picked an ugly one this time...Same Hotel?

Jacob's funeral will be next Friday at 2pm prompt....

Where's John?

Ted: Hey Joe, why ain't John working with us today?
Joe: He's in the hospital.
Ted: That's impossible, I saw him just yesterday dancing with a stripper!
Joe: Yeah, his wife saw him too...

What do you call a stripper who works with amputees?

A stump grinder

Strippers don't use air conditioners...

Only fans

Guys, I used to date a stripper, and let me tell you something...

this lady could get the paint off your walls in no time

Whats the difference between a Magician and a Stripper?

The magician never reveals his secrets...

Misunderstanding.

A man in the supermarket sees a woman across the aisle looking at him, so he goes over and says "do i know you"? She says "you're the father of one of my children". He panics and thinks about the only time he cheated on his wife. "Are you the stripper at that party who had sex with me on the pool table while everyone stood around cheering". "No", she says, looking horrified "i'm your sons teacher".

Why are strippers such good politicians?

'Cause they're good on the polls.

What does a stripper do to her a**hole before going to work?

Drops him off at band practice

What do you call a superpowered stripper?

The Flash

What does a stripper and peanut butter have in common.

They both spread for bread.

What does a stripper do with her a**hole before she goes to work?

She drops him and his drum kit off at band practice.

A woman came up to me and said I'm the father of one of her kids.

I told her look I'm really sorry. You must be that stripper from my buddy's bachelor party. This was obviously years ago when I was younger and didn't care about protection. Plus I was most likely drunk that night which is why I probably never got your number.

She said I meant you're the father of one my students. I'm his teacher.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the stripper dancer jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working stripper striptease piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes