Strawberry Jokes
89 strawberry jokes and hilarious strawberry puns to laugh out loud. Read food jokes about strawberry that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Do you like puns about Strawberries? Have a laugh with these silly Strawberry Jokes! From puns about rude Strawberries, Strawberry Blonde hair, Jam and Sherbet, to jokes about Vanilla and more - there's something to make everyone chuckle!
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Funniest Strawberry Short Jokes
Short strawberry jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The strawberry humour may include short blueberry jokes also.
- My farmer friend told me that horse manure is excellent for strawberries. I said, You may be right, but I still prefer whipped cream.
- How do you hide an elephant in a strawberry patch? Paint it's toenails red.
Don't believe me? Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch? - I'm kinda new to gardening... Someone suggested I put horse manure on my strawberries.
Well, I'm never doing that again...
I'll just stick to whipped cream. - In a farmers market, Farmer A sells pumpkin, Farmer B sells strawberries, what does Farmer C sell? Medicine
... runs off ... - What does one strawberry say to the other? "Well, if you hadn't been so fresh last night, we wouldn't have ended up in this jam!"
- What do you get when you cross a Mexican with an octopus? I don't know, but it sure can pick strawberries.
- I heard Mexicans are pretty good at boxing Strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, tomatoes.
- What did the one strawberry say to the other? If you weren't so fresh, we wouldn't be in this jam!
- In California... Did you know that in California you cannot take a picture of a woman with a basket of strawberries?
...you need a camera because strawberries do not take pictures. - I was the pianist in a piano bar Customer walks up to me and asks Can you play Strawberry Fields Forever?
No, after a few hours my fingers get tired
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Strawberry One Liners
Which strawberry one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with strawberry? I can suggest the ones about strawberries and cream and raspberry.
- Why was the baby strawberry crying? Her mom was in a jam
- Why was the strawberry sad? His mom was in a jam!
- I always forget the french word for strawberry But I eventually remember the fraise
- Why was the young strawberry crying? His parents were in a jam.
- What do you call a microscopic strawberry? A strawbarely.
- What did the strawberry say to the other strawberry? It's your fault we're in this jam
- Why was the baby strawberry crying? Because their mum and dad was in a jam.
- Why did the strawberry cross the road? Because his buddy was in a jam.
- Why were the strawberries upset? Because their parents were in a jam.
- Why couldn't the strawberry shoot it's gun? Because it was jammed
- Why was the young strawberry upset? Cause his mom was in a jam. :(
- Why was the strawberry sad? Because her mother was in a jam.
- What town is Strawberry Fields in? Nothing, Israel.
- What do you call a sunburnt New Zealander? A strawberry kiwi.
- What do you call a sad strawberry? A blueberry!
Strawberry Jam Jokes
Here is a list of funny strawberry jam jokes and even better strawberry jam puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- A lorry carrying 300kg of strawberries crashed into a lorry carrying 50kg of sugar. Instead of helping clear up the accident cars drove through the mess and the jam was getting thicker!
- Why was the little strawberry crying? Because his mom was in a jam.
- Why did the strawberry cross the road? There was a traffic jam.
- Why was the little strawberry sad? Her mommy was in a jam.
- Why was Mr. Strawberry sad? He was in a Jam.
- I left my house and noticed the door wouldn't close because it kept hitting a container of strawberry jam Guess you could say the door was held ajar
- How do you call a bunch of strawberries playing the guitar? A jam session.
- My grandma has ingrained this silly joke since I was young: What did one strawberry say to the other strawberry? If you weren't so fresh last night, we wouldn't be in this jam!
- What did the female strawberry say to the male strawberry If you hadn't of gotten so fresh we wouldn't be in this jam...
- Why was the little strawberry sad? He found out his parents were in a jam
Chocolate Strawberry Jokes
Here is a list of funny chocolate strawberry jokes and even better chocolate strawberry puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Did you hear about the ice-cream vendor found dead in his van covered in strawberry sauce and chocolate sprinkles? Police say he topped himself.
- I recently found an ice cream man dead, covered in sprinkles, chocolate chips and strawberry sauce. He topped himself.
- Today is the Dali Lamas 82nd birthday but he couldn't decide if he wanted a vanilla, chocolate, or strawberry birthday cake... ...so he decided to be made one with everything.
- Strawberries are red, chocolate is brown. Why did you choose vanilla you simple clown.
Strawberry Flavored Jokes
Here is a list of funny strawberry flavored jokes and even better strawberry flavored puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How do you describe Neapolitan ice cream to someone? Your two favorite flavors plus strawberry
- If green gummy bears are strawberry flavored, what is the flavor of yellow gummy bears? PHLEGMon
- "Can I s**... it?" She asked, I said, "No, it's a chew pill with strawberry flavor."
Hilarious Strawberry Jokes that Bring Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about strawberry you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean cherry jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make strawberry pranks.
Berry good
Two guys were arguing over the best way to grow strawberries. One asserted that Miracle-Gro was the best method, the other insisted that cow manure would yield the largest and sweetest berries. They finally decided to ask Mrs. Thompson, who was known far and wide for her succulent, large strawberries. So one farmer says Mrs. Thompson, do you put cow manure on your strawberries. She replied, No, I either eat them plain or add sugar and cream.
My grandma was known all over town for her delicious strawberries. She made me promise that when she died I would plant strawberries over her grave so that everyone could visit her and enjoy them. I fulfilled her wish.
She's dead and berried.
A lady walks into an ice cream shop.
"Can I get a chocolate scoop on a cone?" she asks.
"Sorry, ma'am, but we're out of chocolate ice cream," says the man behind the counter.
"Oh, well then can I get a chocolate sundae?" she asks.
"We're out of chocolate," he repeats.
"Well, how about a chocolate milkshake?"
The man is frustrated at this point and decides to teach her a lesson.
"Ma'am, do you see the 'van' in vanilla?"
"Yes," she says.
"Do you also see the 'straw' in strawberry?"
"I do."
"Ma'am, do you see the 'frick' in chocolate?"
"There's no 'frick' in chocolate..."
"THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU!"
A disabled kid goes out to the ice cream man...
...and says, "Mithster can I've an Icth Cream??" and the Ice Cream man says "Of course you can, what would you like on it? chocolate sauce?, strawberry sauce?, a flake?" and the kid replys "It doethn't matter, I'll jutht drop it anyway"
moles
Mama mole, papa mole, and baby mole all lived in a hole. One day, mama mole stuck her head out and sniffed the air.
"That's weird, I smell grape jelly."
Papa mole squeezes up beside her, sniffs around, and says, "That's funny, because i smell strawberry jam."
Baby mole wanted to sniff the air too, but was stuck behind mama and papa mole, so he said "That's strange, all I smell is molasses!"
Elephants!
Why do elephants paint their toenails red?
...So they can hide in strawberry patches.
Why do elephants paint the soles of their feet yellow?
...So they can hide upside down in a bowl of custard.
Have you ever seen an elephant hiding upside down in a bowl of custard?
How about in a strawberry patch?
No?
See, it works!
homophobic strawberry
A strawberry walks up to his friend the eggplant and asks him what he thinks of the tomato. The eggplant answers "I don't know, he seems like an alright guy. Why? What do you think of him?" The strawberry answers "I don't know, man. He seems like kind of a fruit".
The night before the wedding
The bride-to-be and her bridesmaids were giggling over tequila and strawberry daiquiris at the bachelorette party. The maid of honor started a game of truth or dare.
"If your boyfriend were a soda, what would he be?" she slurred at the other bridesmaid.
"7-Up, because he's got seven inches and he can keep it up. What about you?"
"Mountain Dew. He knows how to mount and do me. And what about the future Mrs. Johnson? What kind of soda is Matt?"
"Jack Daniels," said the bride proudly.
"But that's not a soda! Jack Daniels is a hard liquor!" protested her friends.
The bride looked at them and said, "Girls, why do you think I'm marrying him?"
What do you call blueberries, raspberries and strawberries inside of a hidden chest?
Berried Treasure.
How do you make a strawberry shake?
You put it in the freezer.
The husband asks the wife...
The husband asks the wife:
-Babe which do you like the best, strawberry or banana?
The wife asks him:
-Why are you at the Supermarket?
The husband replys:
No I'm at the pharmacy...
What type of berry can you drink out of?
A strawberry.
A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer.
A little boy playing in front of his house saw him and called,
What've you got in your truck?
Fertilizer, the farmer replied.
What are you going to do with it? asked the little boy.
Put it on strawberries, answered the farmer.
You ought to live here, the little boy advised him. We put sugar and cream on ours!
Who do you hang out with, a strawberry, a celery stick or a mushroom?
The mushroom because he's a fungi.
James and giant peach should have been serialized into a number of films.
Dave and the giant strawberry.
John and the giant cantelope.
Your mom and the giant cucumber.
A soapbox orator addresses a crowd on the glories of communism
Come the revolution, everyone will eat strawberries and cream! A man at the front whimpers, But I don't like strawberries and cream. The speaker thunders, Come the revolution, you will like strawberries and cream!
A man's last meal
So a prisoner is about to be executed and the guards ask him,
What do you want your last meal to be?
Strawberries he responds.
But it's winter. We can't get strawberries until spring
Eh. I'll wait
What did the strawberry say before robbing a house?
"Hands up, this is a stroberry."
I swear Grandma didn't send this to me on Facebook...
Doctor - so, what did you have for dinner last night?
Patient - I had a fruit salad.
D - only fruit salad? Well, that should help with your cholesterol. And strawberries are very high in...
P - well, it was mostly grapes.
D - mostly?
P - well, all grapes.
D - still, fresh grapes are...
P - they weren't overly fresh. Well, a little older, maybe. Fermented?
D - ...
P - Okay, wine. I had wine for dinner.
A guy put a gallon each of strawberry, grape and apple flavored punch in a barrel, jumped in and rolled down a local hill. His friend asked, but why?
He replied: I just wanted to roll with the punches.
A man went to the ice cream shop and ordered a chocolate cone...
I'm sorry, Sir, we're out of chocolate.
Oh, that's too bad. I'll have a chocolate cone with sprinkles then.
I'm sorry, Sir, but like I told you, we're out of chocolate.
How about a chocolate/vanilla twist, then?
Let me ask you something. How do you spell the 'van' in 'vanilla'?
V-a-n.
OK! We're on the same page! And how do you spell the 'straw' in 'strawberry'?
S-t-r-a-w.
Right, and lastly, how do you spell the f**...' in 'chocolate'?
There is no f**...' in 'chocolate'.
THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU!
Pigmy kids bragging
Most kids brag about how tall their fathers are, but pigmy kids brag about how small their fathers are.
One day three kids are playing when one says, "My dad's only 3'1"."
2nd kid says, "That's nothing. My dad's 2'11"."
The 3rd kid was quiet so they asked, How tall is your dad?
He said, "My dad is dead. He fell off a ladder picking strawberries."
Me: Why did the elephant paint his toenails red?
Them: Why?
Me: To hide in the strawberry patch
Them: ……..
Me: have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch?
Them: no?
Me: then I guess it works
Cue applause.
Managed to drop one of the classics today.
Wife and Daughter are sat watching something while I'm doing the Tesco shop on my phone. - Strawberry jam is on the list, I seize my moment
Y'know what i say
- now I think about it…. I like strawberry jam… and I like blackberry jam … but I don't like lemon preserve
That just a curd to me
Priceless!!!
