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Stop Making Jokes

127 stop making jokes and hilarious stop making puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about stop making that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Stop Making Short Jokes

Short stop making jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The stop making humour may include short stop repeating jokes also.

  1. My wife says if I don't stop making puns about Russia, she's going to hit me. If that's the way it's going to be, then Soviet.
  2. Stallone: I'm making a movie about composers. I'm playing Vivaldi. VanDamme: I'll be Mozart.
    Schwarzenegger: Stop it guys I'm not saying it.
  3. Two guys are playing chess. One says to the other, "How about we make this more interesting?"
    So they stop playing chess.
  4. People should really stop making jokes about major tragedies. My Dad died on 9/11... He was the best pilot in Saudi Arabia...
  5. How will you know if you die of the Delta variant of COVID? On your way to heaven or wherever, you'll make a stop in Atlanta.
    *
  6. Testing products on animals Guy: We need to stop testing our products on animals
    Boss: Why? Shampoo companies do that all the time.
    Guy: Ya. But we make hammer.
  7. A guy tried to tell me about a tool that makes holes in hard materials, but I stopped him. I know the drill.
  8. I'm making a film about emos. I really need to stop saying "cut!" at the end of each scene.
  9. I've got this awful disease where I can't stop making airport jokes. The doctor says it's terminal.
  10. My friends told me to stop making chemistry jokes, but then I told just one more I got no reaction, and now all my friends Argon

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Stop Making One Liners

Which stop making one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with stop making? I can suggest the ones about quit acting and quit drinking.

  1. What food makes women stop giving blow jobs? Wedding cake
  2. My black friend told me to stop making racist jokes... ...I told him to lighten up.
  3. Stop making fun of fat girls with lisps They're thick and tired of it.
  4. How do you make a baby cry? Drop it.
    How do you make a baby stop crying?
    Drop it again.
  5. Why did Barty Crouch Jr. stop drinking? It was making him Moody
  6. The U.S mint stopped making pennies. I don't know why, it doesn't make any cents.
  7. We should stop making fun of fat people They have too much on their plate already
  8. Stop making fun of the fat girl Shes thick and tired of it.
  9. When do bakers stop making donuts? When they get tired of the hole thing
  10. My friend told me to stop making Burger King puns I said "fine! Have it your way!"
  11. How do you stop a gambling addict from gambling? Make a bet. They won't refuse.
  12. I can't stop making puns Some say it's a gift. Some say it's a punishment
  13. My spouse told me to stop making animal puns or leave.. I guess alpaca my bags then
  14. I can't stop making nun jokes. Sorry, it's a habit.
  15. My friend stopped making payments to his exorcist. He was soon repossessed.

Stop Making Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter

What funny jokes about stop making you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean stopping jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make stop making pranks.

I cracked a joke about dementia to my friend at the bus. The old man sitting next to me politely asked. "Can you stop making jokes about terminal diseases?"

I replied "yes I cancer." Then I cracked tumor

My wife said she would leave me if I didn't stop making Pokémon references...

'You need to make a choice' she said 'It's either me or the s**... pokémon references!'
'I understand', I replied, holding back tears. 'Sandra, I choose you!!!'

Two brothers live together, and one of them makes tennis equipment for people with gigantism.

Late one night, he is up, hard at work, when his brother knocks on the door. He gets up from his desk, and answers the door.
"What do you want?" he asks.
His brother responds: "Hey, I'm trying to sleep. Can you stop making a huge racket?"

My Mom said to stop drinking soda because it has acid in it.

I replied," Stop making such baseless accusations".

Guys can we please stop making jokes about obesity?

They have enough on their plate already.

My wife wouldn't stop making fun of me for my sense of direction.

So I packed up and Right.

I think we should stop making jokes about fat people

They obviously have enough on their plate already

Still my favorite joke I ever made up. :)

A monocle walks into a bar. After a few drinks he starts to feel pretty good (and a little uncoordinated). He reaches for a cigarette, but the bartender stops him. "Sorry, buddy, but due to city ordinances we don't allow smoking in here. You'll have to step outside to smoke."
So the monocle hops off the bar stool and grabs his cigarettes to head outside. Meanwhile a second monocle emerges from the bathroom. They bump into each other as they cross paths and fall to the floor, hopelessly entangled. They try to get free but the more they struggle, the more tangled they become.
The bartender looks down on this travesty and shakes his head. "Hey you two!" he shouts. "Stop making spectacles of yourselves!"

Ok, you guys are going to have to stop making fun of that fat girl with a lisp

She is thick and tired of it

I have this unusual medical condition where I can't stop making silly airport puns.

The doctor says it's terminal.

Stop making jokes about how fat and disgusting Amy Schumer is.

You're stealing her material.

Being a 6'3 comedian...

a lot of my jokes revolve around short people. However, after receiving multiple complaints, ive decided to stop making short jokes now.
I'm above that.

STOP MAKING FAT JOKES, FAT JOKES ARE NOT FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

they already have enough on their plate

Biology Teacher: "If you can't stop making puns about plants, I'm going to need you to get out." Me:

*leaves*

New Year resolutions:

(1) Stop making lists

(d) become more consistent

(VII) learn how to count

My girlfriend warned me she would break up if I didn't stop making o**... s**... jokes.

I said "That's hard to s**...."

I've got this disease where I can't stop making airport puns.

My doctor says it's terminal.

People tell me to stop making puns, but I can't

Every time I try to s**... my words, I joke on them.

My new years resolutions are:

1: Stop making lists.
B: Be more consistent.
7: Learn to count.

Please stop making 9/11 jokes... my father died on that day.

I still remember his last words: "Allahu Akbar"

'Will you kids stop making that awful racket!'

Said the quality control officer at the sporting goods factory.

I asked my friend to stop making Linkin Park references..

But in the end, it doesn't even matter.

Please stop making jokes about little people

How would you feel if a bunch of giants made jokes about you?

My girlfriend said she was getting annoyed with all my fish puns

So I told her if she wanted me to stop making them to let minnow.

Stop making jokes on short people

It's not funny if the person getting trolled can't enjoy it.
After all, most of the jokes go way over their heads.

For the holidays I've decided to stop making puns...

I'm sure yule appreciate it.

Some people say they should stop making pennies.

If you ask me, that doesn't make any cents.

My wife warned me to stop making breakfast puns…

She said I'd be toast. I replied, our son keeps egging me on, he's such a ham.

David Byrne gets elected as U.S. president.

His first act is to issue an executive order to the U.S. Mint.
To stop making cents.

The internet will never stop making fun of those taking Ivermectin for Covid.

Because the internet loves to beat a dead horse.

I can't stop making figurines of Frodo

It's hobbit forming.

My boyfriend asked me to stop making jokes about killing myself

"Don't worry", I said, "I won't be doing it for much longer."

We need to stop making jokes about common uses for rubber.

It's a tired subject.

My spouse will not stop making puns about Jurassic Park.

I would have thought she'd lose her magic by now, but wife finds a way.

If you adults are so mature then stop making school shooting jokes.

They're directed at a younger audiance
(PLS don't get offended)

Tried to 'woo' my girlfriend last night

she said " I know its you you d**... and stop making those ghost noises"

a programmer and astronaut walk into a bar

Astronaut: we are just tiny dots in this vast universe. What we do is insignificant. Why should we even do anything ? What's the point ?
Programmer: I should stop making these simulations so real.

What do you call a guy who won't stop making swords?

Will Smith

My New Year's Resolution is to stop making commitments that I can't follow through with.

I guess I already failed.

I recently had to stop making clothes for nuns...

It was habit-forming.

Please stop making new flavors of coca cola.

Either you put the c**... back or leave it alone.

My friend asked me to stop making Math jokes

I said that I'm sorry, but bad jokes are my division

A guy takes a girl back to his parents house to have s**......

The only problem is, he shares a bunk-bed with his younger brother. Reluctantly, they decide to proceed -- but he gives her the code words "lettuce" for faster, and "tomato" for slower.
As the two get into it, the boy hears "lettuce! tomato! lettuce! tomato!" coming from the top bunk. He yells out, "Guys! Stop making sandwiches, the mayo is getting all over me!"

Why did the failed fishermen stop making his movie?

He couldn't get past casting

What did the jungle cat say to the comedian in a packed laugh house?

"Stop making me laugh, you are going to make me puma pants".

we should stop making fun of the Americans for using inches, foot, miles, etc as units of measurements.

it's not like they crashed a rocket into Mars because of this or something... oh wait...

One night a man and woman went to his house to have s**... when he stopped her to say "I still live with my parents and me and my brother share bunk beds so if you want to change positions say "lettuce" and if you want to go faster say "tomatos"
So they were getting it on and she was screaming "lettuce, lettuce, tomatos, lettuce, tomatos, tomatos"
Suddenly the younger brother (on the bottom bunk) said
"Could you stop making sandwiches your getting mayonase on me"!

mayo problem

A boy says to a girl, "So, s**... at my place?" "Yeah!" "Okay, but I sleep in a bunk bed with my younger brother, and he thinks we're making sandwiches, so we have to have a code. Cheese means faster and tomato means harder, okay?" Later on the girl is yelling, "Cheese cheese, tomato tomato!" The younger brother says, "Stop making sandwiches! You're getting mayo all over my bed!"

I'm trying to stop making innuendos...

But it's really hard.

Did your mom stop making jokes?

Or do you have younger siblings?

Can you stop making s**... jokes dad?

Dad: You're right. I should stop making s**... jokes. Look how you turned out.

Mum I found Dad

Haven't I told you to stop making holes in the garden?

A boy says to a girl, "So, s**... at my place?" "Yeah!" "Okay, but I sleep in a bunk bed with my younger brother, and he thinks we're making sandwiches, so we have to have a code. Cheese means faster and tomato means harder, okay?" Later on the girl is yelling, "Cheese cheese, tomato tomato!" The younger brother says, "Stop making sandwiches! You're getting mayo all over my bed!"

My wife said she'd leave me if I didn't stop making puns about Scandinavian locations.

I said There's Norway you'd go Oslo as that.

A man was with his son...

The man's son said "D-d-dad?" And the man said "Honey get over here our son is speaking!" The man's son then said "S-stop making fun of my s-stutter I-I'm 20 years old."

I told my wife I was going to build us a car out of spaghetti, She said I was crazy and to stop making s**... comments.

You should have seen her face when I drove pasta.

I had botched eye surgery recently and now I can't stop making puns...

My jokes are cornea than ever

My friends keep telling me to stop making jokes about Linkin Park

But I just ignore them because in the end, it doesn't even matter

Making a sandwhich

So one day a family are checking into a hotel. There is a lack of rooms so they have to make do with one with a bunkbed. The mum and dad are on the top bunk and their son, the bottom
So late at night, the son wakes up to his parents saying things. They had code words for s**... and the mum said tomato for faster and lettuce for slower. Eventually the boy shouts up to his parents
"mum dad, stop making sandwichs, you're getting mayonnaise all over me"^(I'm Sorry)

Why did Taco Bell stop making songs

They do wraps now

Everyone was telling me to stop making bread jokes

But i could tell they were having a loaf

"D-d-d..."

Dad - "Hey look! He's gonna say his first words!"
Son - "D-d-dad I'm 30 years old st-st-stop making fun of my stu-tu-tutter."

Why did the Tuvan t**... singer stop making music?

Because there was a drone strike.

Why did i stop making religious puns?

There's just no prophet in it. That's the last one I'll ever Jew.

Why did the baker stop making doughnuts?

He got tired of the hole thing!

Stop making ethanol from ethene!

It's the yeast you could do...

If you think I'm going to stop making Judas Priest references...

You've got another thing coming

People should really stop making jokes about major tragedies. My grandpa died in Auschwitz...

He fell off a watchtower

My four-year old just said,

My four year old just said,
"Mama, stop making posts pretending you ever got laid."
I didn't know my dog was this observant.

jokes about stop making