Stomach Cancer Jokes
7 stomach cancer jokes and hilarious stomach cancer puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about stomach cancer that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Stomach Cancer Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good stomach cancer joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A woman goes to the doctors complaining of stomach cramps...
She gets sent off for some test and comes back a week later.
"Well, I hope you're ready for endless sleepless nights of crying and changing dirty diapers!" the doc says.
"Wow, you mean I'm pregnant?" the woman replies thrilled.
"No, you've got bowel cancer."
A woman goes to the doctor
A woman goes to the doctor one day and tells him she's been having some stomach pains. In reply the doctor takes some samples and tells the woman to come back a week later when the results are in. So a week later the woman goes to the doctor and asks "So what's wrong with me?", "well..." says the doctor "in 6 months from now you be changing diapers.", in astonishment the woman exclaims "wow, I'm pregnant?", "No..." says the doctor "you have bowel cancer."
We are going to operate on Mike tonight for his stomach cancer.
Today is open Mike night.
A woman goes to the doctor because her stomach has been slowly swelling.
The doctor examines her and says "Expect more swelling and buy some nappies (diapers)."
"Why?" asks the woman. "Am I pregnant?"
"No, you've got bowel cancer."
Topical Jokes for 9/5/14
(for best results, imagine these being read by your favorite late night host)
In Oregon, a veterinarian discovered 43 socks in a Great Dane's stomach. The dog was taken to the vet when the owner wanted to find out why his sock drawer was growling.
To ward off evil spirits, a woman in India has married a stray dog. The woman's biggest complaint about being married to a dog — is everything.
A new study has determined that wearing a bra, does not cause breast cancer. The study did find that going without a bra, causes cancer of the eyes.
Eminemn has been entered into the Guinness Book of World Records by having nearly 1,500 words in the song Rap God. And only 700 of those were the f-word.
The World Health Organization announced that doctors should use the blood of Ebola survivors to treat other patients. This was in response to the question, What's the best way to spread the Ebola virus?
(Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed 'em)
A woman has been having stomach pain for the past week...
A woman goes to the doctor complaining of stomach cramps. Once she reaches the doctor, he tells her they'll need to run a few tests. At the end of the visit, he says she must come back in a week, when the results come in. Once she enters his office, he says, "Well, I hope you're ready for many sleepless nights of crying and changing dirty diapers!"
"Wow, you mean I'm pregnant?" the woman asks excitedly, clasping her hands.
"No, you have inoperable bowel cancer."
You know the story of the guy who looked pale, right?
This o**... is looking really pale, so his friend tells him ¨dude, you're anemic¨. Of course, our guy doesn't believe this, so his friend says ¨I know about these symptoms, you're definitely anemic¨ and bets him 25 bucks on this. "OK", our guy says, "challenge accepted." Together they go to the doctor. While his friend waits outside, the doctor runs some tests, takes some blood, the whole shebang, and after the doctor finishes and gives his diagnosis, the pale guy triumphantically walks out of the hospital and happily greets his friend.
¨So, did you have anemia as I told you?¨, his friend asks. To which he happily blurts out:
¨No dude, you owe me 25 bucks! Doc says I have stomach cancer :)¨
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