The Best 10 Stock Broker Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Stock Broker jokes. There are some stock broker stock market jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these stock broker warren buffett puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Stock Broker Jokes and Puns

I am a stock broker

I am broke after investing in stocks

The funeral

One day a man dies and in his will, he leaves $300,000 to his stock broker, financial adviser and his lawyer, each one receiving $100,000. In the will he also states that he wants all 3 of them to to leave half of the money they received ($50,000) in his coffin after the funeral.

The day of the funeral comes and each man approaches the coffin to do what was asked of them and once they're all done, they meet up at the bar.

After a few drinks, the stock broker speaks up "I gotta be honest with you guys. I only left $10,000 in the coffin. But I mean, it's not like he'll be able to spend it, right?"

To which the financial adviser admits "Hey, don't feel bad. I only left $5,000 in the coffin. I mean, is he really expecting us to throw away that much money?"

At which point the lawyer speaks up and says in a disapproving tone "I can't believe you guys would be so greedy! I'll have you know I left a check for the full $50,000 in his coffin like he asked!"

Why did the Stock Broker quit his job to become a Baker?

He overheard some great advice. "BUY DOUGH, SELL PIE!"

....I'll see myself out.

What do you call a stock broker that also works as a private eye?

An Invest-igator

What's a stock broker's favorite band?

Green Day


The stock broker said to his mistress

I'm going to put everything I've got into rubber, and if it comes off I'll marry you.

What do you get when you cross a stock broker, a detective, and an alligator?

An investigator.

Why did the woman's visit to wall street land her in the hospital?

Because the stock broker!

Why did the stock broker not get upset when his wife divorced him?

Because he's got lots of options.

What does a stock broker and a gym rat have in common?

NEED MORE GAINS

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the stock broker investing jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working stock broker stock prices piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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