Stinks Jokes

What are some Stinks jokes?

From my 7 year-old son: What rhymes with 'boo' and really stinks?


Why I oughta...!

What does a rock put on when it stinks?


My wife complains I use too much toilet paper and I should only use three sheets.

Now she complains that the bed linen stinks.


One day there was a papa bear, a mama bear and a baby bear walking down a forest path. They were happily following the path home until they came to a fork in the road. They were not sure which way to take.

The papa bear chimed in and said "My instincts tell me that we ought to follow the left path!"

The mama bear replied to this "My instincts tell me that the right path is the correct way to go".

The baby bear, listening to both his mama's and his papa's input, replied "My end stinks too, but it's not telling me anything."

A man gets pulled over for speeding

The cop comes over to the window and asks the man, "What's the rush?"
"Well, you see I a body in the trunk and I wanna bury it ASAP before it stinks up the place," Answers the man.
The cop confused, "Why is there a body in the trunk?"
"Well, I wanted to buy 3 kilos of heroin and the other guy wanted to screw me so I shot him," The man calmly replied.
"So there's a dead, 3 kilos of heroin, and a gun in your trunk?!!??!" The cop nervously asks.
"Yeah, and also a bunch of C4. I'm planning to blow up the White House." The man continued.

The cop, frightened, called for back and returned to his vehicle. As the back up arrived the police chief decided to talk to the man in the car again.

"So what's in the trunk?" Asked the chief.
"Nothing just a spare tire."
The chief checks the trunk and sees nothing but a spare tire.
"Ok, where is the bomb, weapons, dead body and drugs?"
"I have no such things." The man answered and seemed very consumed.
"Well, the officer told me you had all these things in your trunk."
The man looks him in the eye and says, "Yeah, he probably said I was speeding too,"

A man sees a couple trash-men working, "Hows's business," he asks...

One of the trash-men reply, "Business stinks, but it's pickin' up."

The badger

A husband and wife are driving home and run over a badger, they get out and find it's still breathing but freezing cold.

The husband says,"Put it between your legs to warm it up."

The Wife replies "But it's all wet and it stinks!"

Husband says "Well, hold its nose!".

A bee, a fly, and a mosquito signed up for a website that sometimes stings, usually stinks, and mostly sucks. What website is this?


My girlfriend told me to kiss her where it stinks.....

So I drove her to New Jersey

You fall asleep in lecture

and when you wake up you cannot remember what class you are in. A demonstration is happening at the front of the class. How do you figure out where you are?

If the demo moves its biology, if it stinks its chemistry, and if it doesn't work its physics.

Three skunks are walking down a road...

And they come to a fork in the road. The first skunk says, "My instincts tell me to go to the left." The second skunk says, "My instincts tell me to go to the right." The third skunk says, "Well my end stinks too, but it doesn't talk to me."

Kids are like farts

You're proud of your own, but everyone else's stinks!

2017 stinks

Billions of people haven't showered since last year.

She said "kiss me wear it stinks"

So I took her to New Jersey and kissed her

What time of day stinks?

The crack of dawn

Oh Sister.

A young nun joined an order which allowed her to say only two words every ten years.

After the first ten years, she said to the Mother Superior -- "Bed hard."

Ten years later, she said -- "Food stinks."

Ten years later, she said -- "I quit."

The Mother Superior said, "I'm not surprised, you've done nothing but complain ever since you got here."

What do houses eat when their breath stinks?

Apart Mints

What's the difference between Limburger cheese and my friend Ted?

One is white and stinks, and the other is cheese. (As told to me by the UPS guy)

It really stinks when you bite into what you expect to be a hot dog but it's actually a sausage

That's the wurst

Two spices are talking

One spice says "man it stinks like b.o. in here!"
Other spice says "come on man I'm only cumin"

A guy came to me at the bar the other day and said "Hey bartender, I don't have much money so give me a cheap shot!"

. . I told him "your mom is ugly and your breathe stinks"

What did Jay Sherman say about your breath?

It stinks!

[OC] My gf went to a psychologist who diagnosed her with a form of mental halitosis.

Apparently her personality stinks.

I just learned that my local supermarket stopped selling my favorite cheese

They cut the cheese and it stinks.

That's it. I'm done. I'm throwing in the towel

Because it stinks and its time to do a load of towels in the laundry.

Imagine yourself in the 1800s...

You're in a large city with a great port. You're in a nicer part of town, away from the water, in a nice inn. You're having a meal of potatoes. You look down - there's a toe! The toe smells like tar and fish. It stinks. Your neighbor leans over and says, "P.U.! That's not just any toe!! That's a portmanteau!"

Dog sees bird flying. Dog asks bird how did you learn to fly like that? Bird says My instincts. Dog says...

Well my end stinks too but I can't get it more than a foot off the ground.

A man and a girl are attracted to one another. The girl tells the man "Kiss me were it stinks" So the man...

... Takes her to New Jersey and kisses her there!

A mushroom walks into a bar and orders a drink...

...but the bartender yells at him to get out before he stinks up the place. The mushroom looks taken aback and says, Why? I'm a fun guy.

How to make Stinks jokes?

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