The Best 29 Stick Finger Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Stick Finger jokes. There are some stick finger jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these stick finger puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Stick Finger Jokes and Puns

What does a bowling ball and your mom have in common?

You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in the gutter, and they'll always come back.

Dark pickup lines

Are you suicide?
Because I think about you every day.

Are you the suicide hotline?
Because I need to get your number.

Are you a noose?
Because I'd love to hang with you.

Are you a coffin?
Because I wish I was inside you.

Are you a death certificate?
Because I wish you were mine.

Are you an electrical outlet?
Because I'd like to stick my fingers inside you.

Are you death?
Because I long for your sweet embrace.

Man sticks finger into electrical socket...

What happens next will shock you.

The year is 2017.

There are machines which can look through skin and see bones. There are machines which keep you alive when your brain and heart have stopped. There's even a machine that can tell you who your parents are with a single drop of spit. However, when I need my prostate checking, a man sticks his finger up my arsehole and wriggles it about a bit.

Twelve-year-old Timmy was talking with his classmate, Lisa...

Timmy: "Hey Lisa, I'll give you a dollar if we can go in the closet and you let me stick my finger in your belly button."

Lisa: "Okay."

They go into the dark closet.

Lisa: "Hey Timmy! That's not my belly button!"

Timmy: "That's okay. That's not my finger."

A hot woman goes up to a guy at the bar and asks "Are you the manager?"

He smiles and says "yep"

She puts her arm around him and says "so it's your job to take care of this place"

"uh huh"

She sticks her fingers in his mouth and whispers in his hear "can I tell you a dirty little secret?"

He emphatically nods whiles mumbling "yes"

"There's no toilet paper in the ladies room"

A woman ask her husband if he wants to go bowling or spend a night together at home...

The man said:

"I don't want to spend my time sticking my fingers in stinky holes where everyone putted their fingers in..

Let's go bowling!"

I got fired from my deli job cause the boss caught me sticking my finger in the pickle slicer..

..turns out he fired her too.

Kissing lead to foreplay...

She liked it when I used one finger,

She: "Now use two fingers"

Me: "Yeah you like that?"

She: "Now stick your hand in..."

Me: "Oh babe, you're kinky"

She: "Two hands now..."

Me: 😦"okay...."

She: "Now clap...

Me: "I can't..."

She: 😏 "I'm tight, right?"

Me and my wife one night

My wife asked me: should we stay on the couch tonight and have a romantic evening or should we go bowling?
I repleid: well i am not sticking my fingers in some holes where every other person has stuck his sweaty dirty fingers in. So let's go bowling.

Two guys walking down the road see a pile of dog poop

One says, "hey that looks like dog poop". Then he bends over and touches it. He says, "feels like dog poop". The other bends over and sniffs it. Says, "smells like dog poop". Then he sticks his finger in it and tastes it. He says "tastes like dog poop". The other one says, "Well, good thing we didn't step in it!!"

Note: little boys crack right up all the way through with this joke. Something about poop is enormously funny to boys.

You can explore stick finger reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean stick finger dad jokes. There are also stick finger puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Dear Middle Finger,

Thanks for always sticking up for me.

What's the difference between a 6 year old and a 16 year old?

Which hole they stick their finger in when no-one's looking.

A Roman man walks into a bar

He sticks up 2 fingers and the bartender gives him 5 beers

Five pounds.

A young woman walks towards a fishmongers stall. She approaches him and says

Woman: I nee five pounds o makkel.

Fishmonger: what was that hon? I couldnt understand you.

Woman: makkel. Five pounds.

Fishmonger: I'm sorry I still didnt catch that.

The woman is visibly frustrated and sticks her hands into her pants, pulling her fingers out and under the man's nose.

Fishmonger: HOLY MACKEREL!

Woman: Five pounds.

Yo Momma's a bowling ball.

She is round and heavy, men stick three fingers into her and push her in the gutter.

Then she comes rolling back for more.

I'd like to thank my middle finger...

For always sticking up for me.

Old age

An old man went to the doctor for his annual check up.
The doctor asks the old man to show him his sex organs.

The old man sticks out his tongue and shows him two fingers.

Why did the little Dutch boy have to register as a sex offender?

He kept on sticking his finger in a tyke.

How do you upset Winnie the Pooh?

Stick a couple fingers in his honey.

Not entirely sure where I heard this...

Roman Centurion walks into a pub and sticks up two fingers at the landlord

"The usual five beers, then, Andronicus!" Replied the landlord

My friend was fired for sticking his finger in the pickle slicer again the other day

Don't worry they fired her too

What's the best way to get a drink out of an Irishman?

Stick your finger down his throat.

I used to work at a deli until I was fired for sticking my finger in the pickle slicer

Turns out the pickle slicer was fired too

Women enjoy sex more than men

Proof : When your ear is itchy and you stick your finger in to scratch it, what feels better your ear or your finger?

The other day at the gym, I noticed a hole in my trainer big enough to stick a finger in

She's now made a formal complaint and my memberships been revoked.

During my last prostate exam I asked my doctor to stick in another finger.

Because I wanted a second opinion.

Chuck Norris cuts paper by sticking his fingers out in a V and moving them up and down.

Chuck Norris doesn't need a stapler, he puts the paper between his fingers and they just stick.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the stick finger jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working stick finger piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes