The Best 51 Stew Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Stew jokes. There are some stew dinner jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these stew slaw puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Stew Jokes and Puns

Two cannibals

Two cannibals are lying around with swollen bellies surrounded by bones.

"Your wife sure makes a great stew," says the first cannibal.

"She sure does," replies the second, "but I'm sure going to miss her."

Why are there only 239 beans in Irish stew?

Because one more, and it'd be too farty.

What did the Three Bears(of Goldilocks) have for dinner?

Stew.

Stew joke, What did the Three Bears(of Goldilocks) have for dinner?

Popular joke in Ukraine

"Driver of a Russian humanitarian aid truck was beaten by Russian soldiers when tried to light a cigarette near cans with beef stew."

What do you call a leper in a jacuzzi?

Stew.

Bonus: what do you do if an epileptic jumps into a jacuzzi? You throw in your laundry.


Stewardess

Yes, Sir?

I want to complain about this airline. Every time I fly, I get the same seat, I can't see the in-flight movie and there are no windows blinds so I can't sleep.

Captain, shut up and land the plane.

My wife and I were camping...

and an angry looking bear surprised us while we were eating. She looked at me and said "Should I give him some of the stew I made?"

I said, "No, he looks angry enough already."

Stew joke, My wife and I were camping...

Who serves all you can eat rabbit stew?

Warren Buffet!

If you can say these four words very fast without getting tongue tied, you're a genius.

1) Eye
2) Yam
3) Stew
4) Peed

Tried to sign up to a website the other day...

I put my password as "beef stew"

It said password not stroganoff.

What do you call

What do you call a Leper in a hot tub?

Stew!

Just an old joke I remember from my child hood lol

You can explore stew soup reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean stew nutritious dad jokes. There are also stew puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


What do you call a guy who falls into a Yellowstone hot spring?

Stew.

I just told a cow that he's being watched.

I always like to make beef stew.

Challenge

Only a Genius can say these four words, Four times Really fast without getting Tongue twisted.
Eye , Yum , Stew , Peed

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on your wall?

Art.

That same guy in your pool? Bob

Same guy in your hot tub? Stew

Sitting under your car that's missing a wheel? Jack

Same guy on your porch? Matt

Same guy getting hit with a baseball bat? Homer

Same guy lying in a pile of leaves? Russel

What do you call a girl with one leg shorter than the other? Eileen

Chinese girl with the same condition? Irene.

A Chinese man stumbles home late one night really drunk...

Seeing his wife at the top of the stairs he says "hey baby how about a little number 69!"

The wife replies, "you drunk sonofabitch, make your own Mongolian Beef Stew!"

Stew joke, A Chinese man stumbles home late one night really drunk...

I want my password to be beef stew

but google says it's not stroganoff.

What did the stewardess say when the vulture tried to board the plane with two dead raccoons?

"Sorry, only one carrion per passenger."

What do you call an artist who loves making stew?

Stewart.


My computer asked me to pick a password, so I typed Beef Stew.

Unfortunately it wasn't Stroganoff.

Disney have finally announced a Ratatouille sequel!

It's called "Incredible Stew"

I tried to make my password "Beef stew"...

... but got the error message "your password is not stroganoff"

How do you make gorilla stew?

You keep it waiting

Russian computer: "Enter password"

Me: "Beef stew"

Russian computer: "Password not stroganoff"

Google said I couldn't use "beef stew" as my password.

It's not stroganoff.

What country has the coldest bean stew

Chile

I just found out I couldn't use "beef stew" as a password.

Apparently it's not stroganoff.

The steward on the plane asked me if I would like an inside seat.

I said, "They're all inside seats."

I ordered rabbit stew but had to return it.

There was a hare in my soup

A boy came to a restaurant with his dad

Waiter: What would you like to order?

Dad: I'll have the rabbit stew.

Waiter: Ok. Only if you promise not to say ''Waiter, there's a hare in my stew'' after I bring it to you

Dad:

Waiter:

Dad: I'll have the chicken

Restaurant

WAITER: are you ready to order?

DAD: I'll have the rabbit stew

WAITER: only if you promise not to say "waiter there's a hare in my soup" after I bring it

DAD:

WAITER:

DAD: I'll have the chicken

What do you call a stew that is less gross?

A st

Do not use beef stew as a computer password.

It is not stroganoff.

Beef stew isn't a good password

it's not Stroganoff

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs boiling in a pot of water?

Stew

One day my mum made a stew out of cow intestines.

It tasted offal.

I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together.

Riveting!

You know who really gives kids a bad name?

Posh and Becks.

Why did the Irishman put only 239 beans in his stew?

Because if he put one more it would be two forty.

How do you program a computer to make beef stew?

You use bullion logic.

Tonight we're having Himalayan rabbit stew for dinner.

We found himalayan on the road.

I'm developing a gun that shoots east european stew.

I call it the Goulashnikov.

Why did the Irish woman only put 239 beans in her stew?

Because just one more would be too farty.

stewardess on my flight wasn't holding back. telling everyone exactly what she thought.

walking down the aisle, looking right at everyone, saying trash trash trash

What do call a man with no arms and no legs in a jacuzzi?

Stew

I made my special sausage-and-okra stew this evening. Asked my wife how it is and she said,

Eh, it's meaty okra.

I was going to make alligator stew for dinner tonight

But then I realized I only have a croc pot.

What did the stewardess say to the vulture when he boarded the flight with two bags?

Only one Carrion permitted on this flight.

What did the cannibal name his son?

Stew.

Why did the restaurant guest send back the beef stew?

It was offal.

Why do Irish people only ever put 239 beans in their stew?

Because one more would be too farty.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the stew veggies jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working stew leper piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes