The Best 35 Steak Dinner Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Steak Dinner jokes. There are some steak dinner jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these steak dinner puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Steak Dinner Jokes and Puns

A guy walks into a bar and sees that there are dozens of cuts of meat hanging from the ceiling.

Confused, he asks the bartender why this is.


Well, it's a promotion we are running. If you can jump up and grab one, you get a free New York Strip dinner, on us! But, if you attempt to do so and miss, you gotta buy one for every person here instead.


The guy takes a moment to scan the bar, counting up the number of patrons in his head, before turning to the bartender and replying


Ah, no thanks. The steaks are too high.




———
Shout out to my dad for telling me this joke dozens of times throughout my life. It never fails to get a laugh outta a new crowd. Thanks Joe, you da best.

Why didn't Han Solo enjoy his steak dinner?

It was Chewie.

I had small wookiee steak for dinner...

...it was a little chewie.

A man has dinner at a chinese restaurant

The man says to the chef:
"Gee, this steak is rubbery!" And the chef replies "thank you very much!"

A one-armed eldery man and his wife step into a restaurant in Paris

The man orders a steak while his wife goes for a salad. The waiter sees the man struggle with his steak, as he only has one arm. The waiter feels bad for the man, but doesn't want to ask him if everything is alright because he might embarrase the man. At one point the man leaves the table to go to the bathroom and the waiter approaches the woman.

"Is everything alright?" He asks. The woman tells him that her husband lost his arm in the second world war when he was fighting in Paris. The waiter tells his manager they've got a proper veteran in their restaurant and the manager doesn't think twice. "Everyone that fought for our freedom eats for free!"

The waiter brings them the good news and the couple is much delighted. After dinner the manager and the waiter escort the couple to the door. When holding the door open for the veteran he looks at the manager and says "Vielen dank für die guten abend"


A boy works up the courage to ask the girl he likes on a date

The girl, liking him back, agrees to go on the date.

The boy tells her "Before we go on our date, there's something I have to tell you about myself. I only eat insects."

The girl finds this to be very strange but accepts it because she likes him.

They go out to dinner and the girl orders a steak while the boy eats an arrangement of insects he brought from home.

In the parking lot after dinner the two lock eyes, lean in, and slowly kiss each other. After the kiss the girls eyes are lit up with magic and she asks the boy how their first kiss felt.

The boy replies "I've got butterflies in my stomach."

Man and woman are out on a dinner date.

Waiter: "What will you be having tonight ma'am?"

Woman: "I'll have the salad, no nuts please."

Waiter: "Of course."

Man: "But it didn't say it had nuts."

Woman: "I'm allergic, so I tell them just to be safe."

Man: "That makes sense."

Waiter: "And for you, sir?"

Man: "I'll have the steak, no bees please."

A man and a woman go out to dinner...

This is during the time the Mad Cow disease ravished Britain. A man and a woman are sitting at a table when the waiter approaches them, asking "what would you like for dinner?"

The man replies, I'll have a fat juicy steak, medium rare with all the trimmings. Gravy and roast potatoes please. The waiter asks "what about the mad cow?"

To which the man replies
"Nahh she'll just have fish"

Margaret Thatcher takes the cabinet out for dinner

Margaret Thatcher takes the cabinet out for dinner. The waiter comes along and asks her what she will be eating tonight.

Margaret replies, 'I'll have the steak.'

The waiter then asks, 'What about the vegetables?'

To which Margaret says, 'They'll have the same as me.'

So a guy is eating a steak dinner at a restaurant...

...when the waitress comes over and asked the man "How did you find the steak, sir?" The man looks at her and says "I just moved the potatoes."

A husband and wife went out to dinner

A husband and wife went out to dinner. They settled in a nice steak restaurant and begin ordering. The man told the waiter, "I would like a regular sirloin steak." The waiter asks, "and the doneness?" The man says, " I would like it bloody-rare." The concerned waiter asks, "what about Mad-Cow?" The man replies, "Oh, she can order for herself."

You can explore steak dinner reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean steak dinner dad jokes. There are also steak dinner puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


[Long] I was at dinner with my wife...

I ordered a steak and the waiter delivered it with his thumb on top of it. "Sir, this is unacceptable, your thumb was in my food," I complained. The waiter replied, "I'm sorry sir, I didn't want it to fall on the floor again."

A stormtrooper sits down to have dinner with his family...

His son asks him "dad what is this we are eating?"
The stromtrooper replies "Baby wookie steaks. How is it?"
His sons says "It's a little chewy."

A couple is having a dinner at home.

A couple is having a dinner at home.A husband has a big piece of steak with the small piece of steak on his plate.He decided to give his wife the smaller one and he eats the bigger one.



The wife then remembers her past:"When we were first married,you give me the bigger steak and eat the smaller one. Now you don't love me anymore!!"



The husband replies:"That's nonsense darling,you cook better now!"

Bill and Hillary Clinton are eating dinner in a town where there has been a recent outbreak of Mad Cow disease.

When the waiter comes to take their order, Bill asks for a steak.

But sir, what about the Mad Cow? the waiter asks, concerned.

Don't worry, Bill replies, she'll order for herself.

Putin & Medvedev go to a restaurant for dinner

Waiter comes over & asks them what they'd like to have.

"I'll have the steak."

"Excellent choice Sir. What about the vegetable?"

"He too will have a steak."

My father looked at me over the dinner table as I chewed on a massive steak

"Aren't you going to eat anything else?"
He asked.
"Cavemen only ate meat, do you see any of them around?"
I looked up at him and replied.
"Yes."

When I was about 5

On holiday with my parents, after a loooong day we finally go for dinner. We all ask for steaks. The waiter asks how we want them. Everyone else says for medium. With a surprising look I confidently ask the waiter for an extra large one! Idiots!!

How to make your steak taste better?

Eat it with bunch of vegans on the dinner table.


Jeffrey Dahmer once sent me a dinner invitation

But the offer was a me steak.

A farmer accidentally let his cows graze on his weed field

Dinner that night was high steaks

My wife dropped a piece of steak down her shirt at dinner last night.

I told her not to worry, it was only a little missed steak!

If you don't order beef for dinner...

That's a missed steak.

Everybody wanted steak for dinner but my kid wanted lobster

My wife is now scolding me for caving to his shellfish demands

I had to ask for help to reach my favorite TV dinner from the top shelf of the frozen foods aisle.

The steaks were too high.

This is a traditional joke from my culture. Warning, the humor is a bit different than you're used to

Two men are having dinner. One man orders an uncooked fish, and the other man orders uncooked steak. Both are skeptical of the other's raw food. The fish man then orders a Martini, and the steak man orders pure alcohol. The fish man tells the other man not to drink it. The steak man chugs the alcohol. A few hours later, the steak man is at the hospital. The fish man visits. The fish man tells him that he once pulled a charger out of the wall. The steak man dies.

Due to covid-19, I am not able to have a wonderful wagyu steak dinner at a restaurant for my anniversary

Usually it's due to the lack of money.

NOAH'S DIARY: Day 42...

NOAH'S DIARY: Day 42
Dragon steak for lunch, and Unicorn pie for dinner.

A couple are about to finish their dinner, when the waiter arrives.

Waiter: How did you like your steak, ma'am?

Wife: Oh it was good, thank you. Pay the chef my compliments.

Waiter: And Sir, how did you find your Pork Belly?

Husband: Oh well, we met on a train some fifteen years ago...

I wanted to make me chicken for dinner but I picked up the wrong meat at the grocery store.

I made me steaks.

For Men Having Steak For Dinner, Is Just Like Having Sex...

Generally you are eating out, it cost alot and you never want to finish...

What's for dinner Dad?

What's for dinner Dad?

*Wookie steak.*

Is it any good?

*A little Chewy*

I hate reality. But where else can you get a good steak dinner?

What did the Buddhist monk say to the dog that ran off with his dinner?

NAMA-STEAK

Just as quarantine ends, you win your choice of an all-expenses-paid vacation anywhere in the world for you and your spouse, or a steak dinner with your friends. Which do you choose...

(a) medium rare,
(b) medium, or
(c) well done?

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the steak dinner jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working steak dinner piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes