Statistical Jokes
43 statistical jokes and hilarious statistical puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about statistical that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Dive into the world of statistical jokes with this article! Learn about the clever puns and parodies that the world of statistical mechanics has to offer. See how integration, functions, and statistical significance are used to bring a smile to any physicists face.
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Funniest Statistical Short Jokes
Short statistical jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The statistical humour may include short statistician jokes also.
- Statistics say that 1 out of 3 people in a relationship is unfaithful. I just need to work out if that's my wife or my girlfriend
- Statistics are like bikinis. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.
Edit- This is a famous quote by Aaron Levenstein. A Professor told this to a friend. - Statistics say that 1/3 of people cheat in their relationships Which got me thinking,
Is it my wife or is it my girlfriend who is cheating? - I heard a statistic that there are more men named David in charge of companies than there are women. Well obviously. How many women do you know named David?
- Never get married. It'll only end in divorce. The statistics don't lie. 100% of divorces started with marriage. Can't say I didn't warn you.
- A teacher is explaining the concept of statistics with an example: "Statistically, every time I breathe out, someone dies." Student: "Have you tried antiseptic mouthwash, sir?"
- Statistics say that 60% of women take medication for mental illness, Which means 40% aren't taking their medication.
- Statistics show that 1 out of 3 people in a relationship are cheating..... I just need to figure out if it's my wife or girlfriend
- This is a frightening statistic 25% of the women in this country are on medication for mental illness!
That's scary!
It means 75% are running around untreated! - Statistics is like a bikini on a beautiful woman... ... what it reveals is exciting; what it hides is vital.
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Statistical One Liners
Which statistical one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with statistical? I can suggest the ones about statutory and stats.
- I was shocked to read this. Statistically 6 out of 7 dwarves aren't Happy
- Statistics show that six out of seven dwarves aren't happy
- My statistics professor told me I was average... ... I told her "that's Mean".
- Why is studying statistics hard to do in Afghanistan? because of the tally-ban
- When are minorities not minorities? When you look at crime statistics.
- I don't understand statistics like mean, mode and median Is that normal?
- can somebody tell me how statistics are done mathematician: by all means
- Statistically, 6 out of 7 Dwarfs aren't Happy.
- I got a paper cut from my Statistics homework. What are the odds?
- Statistics show that 47% of people are pedantic. Well, 46.8%.
- Statistically speaking... 6/7 dwarfs aren't happy.
- In college, I failed statistics 5 times in a row. What are the odds?
- Every 40 seconds... A statistic is misused.
- I Got Worried After Reading the Statistic on Marriage 50% of them last forever!
- What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Muhammad, statistically
Statistical Significance Jokes
Here is a list of funny statistical significance jokes and even better statistical significance puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I heard the latest statistic that 1 in 3 people cheat on their significant others that means either my wife or my girlfriend is cheating on me.
Hmm.... - I experimented with drugs... ...and I had a statistically significantly significant number of trials when I did.
- What do you call a statistically significant amount of u**... enough to give you the urge to void? the p-value
Silly & Ridiculous Statistical Jokes to Spread Joy & Laughter
What funny jokes about statistical you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean theoretical jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make statistical pranks.
Statistics show that the average person has s**... 89 times a year
Today's going to be great!
I saw a study online that said 1 out of 10 people are gay, which freaked me out because I've had s**... with 10 people
Statistically, that means one of those other dudes was probably gay
Based on statistics
The most used s**... position among married couples is d**......
The husband sits and begs, while the wife rolls over and plays dead.
Facts of life
At his 103rd birthday party, my grandfather was asked if he thought that he'd be around for his 104th.
"I certainly do," he replied. "Statistics show that very few people die between the ages of 103 and 104."
Jimmy approached his teacher
After looking at the syllabus for their next lesson on graphing, Jimmy approached his teacher with a stern look on his face and said, I'll do algebra, I'll do trig, I'll even do statistics, but graphing is where I draw the line!
People are always saying Americans are fat, violent, and above all else, s**...
But every time I see one of those statistics maps about how terrible we are, there's this little country on the northwest border of Canada that's just as bad as we are.
Statistics say that the typical man has s**... 92 times a year...
I feel that December will be amazing
44% of Marriages end in divorce.
That means 56% of marriages are fatal.
I love statistics.
I'll do algebra, I'll do trigonometry, I'll even do statistics.
But graphing is where I draw the line!
Johnny's parents hired a tutor to help him with statistics
after his first session with the tutor, his parents asked him how it went.
johnny said "well, today i learned that correlation is not equal to causation"
johnny's mother was pleased: "so hiring this tutor is really helping you understand statistics!?"
johnny responded "well, not necessarily."