Starbucks Jokes

150 starbucks jokes and hilarious starbucks puns to laugh out loud. Read places jokes about starbucks that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Why did the coffee go to therapy? Because it was having a venti problem! If you're looking for a good laugh and some hilarious Starbucks jokes, then look no further! This article has everything you need to get your coffee fix and have a good chuckle.

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Funniest Starbucks Short Jokes

Short starbucks jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The starbucks humour may include short coffee jokes also.

  1. TIL America has more museums than Starbucks and McDonald's combined. Starbucks and McDonald's have a combined total of 0 museums.
  2. Just been in to Starbucks and the barista was wearing a face mask I asked "Why are you wearing a surgical mask?"
    She said "I'm not, it's a coughy filter."
  3. Coughy Filter Joke The barista at Starbucks was wearing a face mask.
    Me: Why are you wearing a surgical mask?
    She said: I'm not, it's a coughy filter.
  4. This barista at StarBucks looked so nervous as she handed me my coffee. I think she was scared because she spelt my name wrong, she wrote "callthecops".
    I didn't bother leaving a tip.
  5. I heard Starbucks is trying to hire a lot more refugees Those poor art majors are going to suffer, then
  6. Did you hear about the Starbucks no-mask deal? Mask-less customers who buy a Grande hot coffee today... Will get a free Venti later
  7. John robbed some coffee from Starbucks the other day. The police are charging him for mugging.
  8. I made a Starbucks barista cry I put my name down as Dad and he stood there calling it over and over again with no reply.
  9. Frankie Boyle Madeleine mccann joke Yeah, I saw the McCanns on there and really wanted them to go, Could you round it up in the next few minutes, mate? We’ve left the kids over in Starbucks
  10. A scientist walks up to a gender studies major in a Starbucks. What does the gender studies major say? "Welcome to Starbucks. Can I take your order please"

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Starbucks One Liners

Which starbucks one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with starbucks? I can suggest the ones about latte and espresso.

  1. I once took a girl to Starbucks because I forgot her name.
  2. I took my girl to starbucks.. Cause i forgot her name
  3. My friends that majored in English always tell me the same thing Welcome to Starbucks!
  4. What currency do they use in space? Starbucks
  5. What's long and white? The line to Starbucks.
  6. How do aliens pay for their coffees? With Starbucks!
  7. So, a cheerleader walks into a Starbucks... and shouts, "gimme a tea!"
  8. Judge threw out a lawsuit against Starbucks said the Plaintiff had no grounds.
  9. What do aliens use for currency? Starbucks!
  10. What kind of currency do astronauts use? Starbucks
  11. What does a sick person get from Starbucks? A coughfee
  12. What do you order at Starbucks when you're sad? A desspresso
  13. Why is Starbuck's coffee so high on the pH scale? It's the most basic drink there is.
  14. An astronaught came into the shop today He didn't have cash but he did have Starbucks
  15. What did the Minotaur order at Starbucks? Half calf

Starbucks Coffee Jokes

Here is a list of funny starbucks coffee jokes and even better starbucks coffee puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • My friend got locked in a coffee place overnight. Now he only ever goes into Starbucks, not the rivals. He's Costa-phobic.
  • I told the woman in Starbucks to make a coffee for my girlfriend. "How strong?"
    "Well," I replied. "I could definitely take her in a fight."
  • So, today I found out that Starbucks coffee is an 8 on the ph scale I guess that you could say all of those white girls are basic.
  • Go to Starbucks - Order Coffee
    - Tell them your name is Waldo
    - Leave
  • even though coffee is more acidic, all Starbucks coffee products have a pH of 14 Extremely basic
  • What size coffee do Bishops order at Starbucks? Grande
  • I like my firstborn son like I like my coffee. Made behind the counter at Starbucks.
  • I got fired from Starbucks for making coffee too dark. They said it was grounds for termination.
  • I was in Starbucks the other day and I saw a guy who dropped his coffee on the floor by mistake..... I said to the man "wow, you actually dropped it like it's hot"
  • Starbucks has starting to offer free drinks during funerals They acknowledged the need for mourning coffees

Starbucks Name Jokes

Here is a list of funny starbucks name jokes and even better starbucks name puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • At a Starbucks job interview "What is your name?"
    "Could you spell that, please?"
    -L A R I S S A
    "When can you start?!"
  • What's the best thing about having a girlfriend who is addicted to Starbucks? You'll never forget her name.
  • What do you do when you forget your girlfriend's name? Take her to Starbucks
  • I told my first date to meet me at Starbucks because I forgot her name But the date went horribly wrong since Starbucks got her name wrong.
  • I ask starbucks to write Ari as my name on every cup That way i can say its 'Ari on a Grande'
  • Starbucks is changing their name! To EightBucks
  • They got my name wrong at Starbucks... I said Tom, not Max.
    It wasn't even the right drink either.
  • Starbucks rules apply When Ariana Grande turned 20, shouldn't she have changed her name to Ariana Venti?
  • How do you get your Starbucks in less than a minute? Tell the barista your name is 'Fire'. When they call your name, everyone will run outside quickly.
  • Instead of going to Starbucks.. I like to make my own coffee, yell my name out incorrectly, and then light a $5 bill on fire.
Starbucks joke, Instead of going to Starbucks..

Starbucks Barista Jokes

Here is a list of funny starbucks barista jokes and even better starbucks barista puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I went into a Starbucks earlier and asked the barista why they were wearing a surgical mask. They replied: "I'm not, it's a coughy filter"
  • The Starbucks in my town just hired a Jewish barista... He brews.
  • I tried washing my coffee maker today Now I'm no longer allowed in Starbucks unless the barista has the restraining order removed.
  • My Starbucks barista thinks he's so smart just because he has a PhD in humanities.
  • Before Chance was involved in music he was a barista at Starbucks for 5 years Chance the Frapper
  • Tall blonde Starbucks barista: hello! What would you like today?
    A tall blonde please.
    I'm so sorry we're out of blonde roast today.
    Can I get a tall brunette instead?
  • What do baristas in space get paid with? Starbucks
  • Well, just told the Starbucks barista my name is "No War in Syria". I know it's not much, but I hope it helps.
  • What request does a Starbucks barista find most difficult to fulfil? A Tall order.
  • I heard some guy who works at my local Starbucks is now a wrestler His finisher is the Barista Bomb

Starbucks Size Jokes

Here is a list of funny starbucks size jokes and even better starbucks size puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • The Starbucks employee asked me if I wanted my drink sized Venti. I said "nah I want the one size smaller than that" And then everything exploded.
  • Starbucks is releasing new party oriented drinks... Coming in size quaranta
  • This year, Starbucks are issuing a new cup size for Christmas. It's called the Adventi.

Starbucks Drive Thru Jokes

Here is a list of funny starbucks drive thru jokes and even better starbucks drive thru puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What do Starbucks customers that can't go through the drive thru get on their pumpkin spice latte? No whip.
Starbucks joke, What do Starbucks customers that can't go through the drive thru get on their pumpkin spice latte?

Gather Around for Heartwarming Starbucks Jokes and Uplifting Humor

What funny jokes about starbucks you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean starbucks name jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make starbucks pranks.

Why did the lead singer of Drowning Pool lose his job at Starbucks?


Son's earring

d**... up my a**...

starbucks is like a h**......

one on every corner and money upfront before they scream your name

(real news) Select Starbucks stores have been offering customers the option of adding carbonation to their drinks.

In response, Dunkin' Donuts is offering customers the option of having an employee make motorboat noises into their coffee.

Have you heard the joke about Oprah's new line at Starbucks?

It's a warm, comforting, medium-dark roast.

In the window of a bar in Philadelphia

Drop a bucket of Starbuck's Iced Coffee on your head to raise awareness of the rich city girls who have lost their ability to even.

I was in the queue at Starbucks this morning.

The man getting served in front of me, asked for a mocha. "Sorry sir, but we're out of mochas". The guy was fuming "I have a mocha every morning when I come in here!", he raged, "I'll just have to have a latte!". He went and sat down.
I went to the counter and said "I'll have a large latte too, please". They asked me for my name. I asked why they needed it and they told me that they'd write it on my cup and shout it when it was ready.
So I told them my name was Mocha.

What do birds order when they go to Starbucks?


If a white girl goes to starbucks and doesn't post a picture on instagram, did she really go to starbucks at all?

Trivia: If you stood every single Starbucks employee around the equator...

I would totally steal a white chocolate and raspberry muffin.

What do aliens use to buy their coffee?


Overheard at Starbucks:

Man: Would you like to try a pumpkin spice latte?
Woman: No. Since Trump came on the scene I am boycotting everything orange.

My brother just finished his doctorals

So he went to Starbucks to celebrate.
The cashier said. "What would you like sir?"
"I would like an espresso please" my brother replied.
"Okay sir, I just need your name." The cashier said.
"It's Stephen" My brother replied.
"With a 'ph'?" The cashier asked.
My brother then replied. "No, it's Stephen, with a PhD"

Hunters should always know what's behind their target

Behind mine is a Sam's Club and a Starbucks

Excuse me, there's a large rat in your restroom.

Me: Excuse me, there's a large rat in your restroom.
Starbucks Employee: I'm sorry, what was that?
Me, leaning in: I said there's a large rat in your restroom.
Starbucks Employee: I'm sorry dear, I didn't quite get that.
People In the Store: *Look at me like I'm an idiot*
Me: *sigh* There's a *VENTI* rat in your restroom!

When asking a basic white girl if she wants some Starbucks, the short answer will always be "yas"

The long answer is probably going to be "yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas"

A White, American, college age female walks into a starbucks...

She doesn't order anything.

I told my girlfriend to wear her Starbucks uniform so we can roleplay during s**...

She got my name wrong.

I like my women the way I like Starbucks

I just can't afford either

Police on lookout for Starbucks thief

Suspect is still at veinte

What kind of exercise do you do after drinking too much Starbucks?


What do the zodiac signs use to pay for coffee?


I was feeling really down the other day so decided to give myself a coffee e**...

It worked a treat, but the manager of Starbucks was livid.

What's the difference between Starbucks and a p**...?

Nothing, they both s**... and will empty your wallet!

Starbucks makes a drastic move to their menu to improve community relations

Patrons may no longer order black coffee.

I ordered two tall b**... at Starbucks yesterday.

But they were taken away by the police.

Bill Maher- Did you hear what happened at Starbucks?

They ordered two b**... to go.

What's the pH of a Starbucks Frappuccino?

I'm not sure of the exact number, all I know is that it's *very* basic.

I'm not a fan of Starbucks new racial bias training

I just got thrown out for ordering a black coffee

What will Steve rogers say to order a drink at starbucks

An iced americano for an iced americano

Going to Starbucks for coffee is like going to prison for s**......

You know you're going to get some, but it's going to be rough.

I saw that pastor from Aretha Franklin's f**... at Starbucks again

He was just grabbing a Grande.

What did the hipster say when a Starbucks opened in his neighbourhood?

You can't gentrify this place! I just moved here!

I was out by Starbucks today and saw a woman taking a picture of her food. she was there for 45 minutes trying to get the perfect angle,

Then I realized I just started at a woman from across the room for 45 minutes.

A girl missed out on a quiz because she stopped at Starbucks for a coffee

She was Latte to the class

Day 329 without s**...

I went to Starbucks just so that I could hear someone scream my name....

Bert Kreischer coffee black joke

Starbucks Barista - How would you like your coffee?
ME - Handcuffed for nothing & taken to jail.
(I like my coffee like I like my men. Black and wrongly accused based only on that.)

What do you call a Russian Starbucks


I prefer m**... only when I'm completely n**...

Don't like that? Go to a different Starbucks!

Where do Martians get their coffee from?

I'm sorry.

I started stealing peoples drinks at Starbucks just to see how it feels

Not my cup of tea

Did you know that Starbucks can make your teeth whiter?

Enough pumpkin spiced latte will make anything whiter

What do you call a bench at Starbucks?

A basic bench

Two dog owners are arguing about whose pet is smarter.

My dog is so smart, says the first owner, that every morning he goes to the store and buys me a sesame seed bagel with chive cream cheese, stops off at Starbucks and picks me up a mocha latte, and then comes home and turns on ESPN, all before I get out of bed. I know, says the second owner. How do you know? the first demands. My dog told me.

Where does an astronaut get coffee?


Starbucks are looking to buy out their biggest rival

Bet that would Costa lot of money

Jesus walks up to his favorite Starbucks' counter and politely asks for a grande macchiato.

The barista, puzzled, inquires, Why the new order?
I've been stuck on a tall Pike for a while.
(An original by me.)

Starbucks joke, Jesus walks up to his favorite Starbucks' counter and politely asks for a grande macchiato.

jokes about starbucks