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Staple Jokes

35 staple jokes and hilarious staple puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about staple that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Laugh at jokes involving a staple gun, challah, and other nomadic ingredients in this humorous article. Find out what makes these staples so funny and why some audiences can relate.

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Funniest Staple Short Jokes

Short staple jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The staple humour may include short fasten jokes also.

  1. Dark Joke from my sister when she was 6. Her: How did the dead baby get across the road?
    Me: How?
    Her: It was stapled to the chicken.
    Me: .....
  2. What's the difference between a staple and a screw? I couldn't tell you because I've never been stapled.
  3. End of the World: Stock up on Staples. My Mom: Do you think this War is the end? Do you think we should stock up on staples?
    My Dad: I don't think there will be that much paperwork.
  4. The workers at Staples must have loved college They write "college ruled" on all the notebooks.
  5. How is it that rice originated from China to become a staple food for a large part of the world's human population? I mean, come on! They couldn't even pronounce it.
  6. Did you hear about the man addicted to eating office supplies? It was a staple of his diet.
  7. If you need money for staple foods.... Then you're asking for bread money.
    If you need it for pizza, then it's Pizza Dough!
  8. I'm been living in an office supply cupboard for a few months now... ...it doesn't have many luxuries but it does have all the staples.
  9. My doctor told me I should be on a staple diet. I told him I don't think I can digest metal and walked out.
  10. A good postal worker can leave you with a smile on your face for the rest of the day. A bad postal worker uses staples.

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Staple One Liners

Which staple one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with staple? I can suggest the ones about steppe and stitches.

  1. Why was the young boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face
  2. My math teacher Staples Burger King applications on failed tests.
  3. A man lived for ten years eating only tiny pieces of metal It was his staple diet
  4. What do you call it when someone assumes what the staple crop of Japan is? Ricist
  5. If greens are the staples of a healthy diet... I'm gonna need some paperclips.
  6. I do my grocery shopping at Office Depot It's a staple diet.
  7. Ponce de Leon stapled a bird to my home He gone geese da door
  8. Why did the stapler get sick? It ate something outside of its staple diet.
  9. What do corn and staples have in common? They're both staples.
  10. Among office supplies, one always finds paper clips. One might say they are staples.
  11. I got the best scissors the other day from Staples, it was... ...cutting-edge technology
  12. Does staples really have Staples
  13. I've been waiting for the bus so long, someone just stapled a lost cat flyer to my chest.
  14. Why did the zombie baby cross the road?
    He was stapled to the chicken.
  15. It has to be Ironic that I was just cut by a staple. Fe
Staple joke, It has to be Ironic that I was just cut by a staple.

Laughter Staple Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity

What funny jokes about staple you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean glue jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make staple pranks.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

It is an unspoken rule that if a little kid is hiding under a blanket or couch cushions, you are required to comment on how lumpy the blanket is and pretend to sit on it to try and "smooth it out.".....

Screw that, enjoy the peace, leave them there as long as possible. Just get a staple gun and staple the blanket down.

My college professor messed up our finals and gave it to us out of order

I asked him why he was so sloppy with his organization, but he didn't have a response.
I recommended getting a stapler. When he asked me why bother, I told him "Well, it's a staple in every test."

I heard that the military is now using pens as weapons

Boy, office supplies really are becoming a staple of modern weeponry

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A duck walks into a store

Got any duct tape?
The owner answers, no, and get out of here, you dumb duck!
The duck comes back in a little while later, wearing a fake mustache. Got any duct tape?
NO! And get out, I won't tell you again, the owner shouts.
A while later, the duck comes back with a hat and glasses. Got any duct tape?
No, you s**... duck!!! And if you ask me again, I'll staple your beak to the floor!
The duck pauses.
Got any staples?
Err... no...
Got any duct tape?

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

I was looking for staples, so my friend brought me to the staple store.

I went to d**...'s right after

How do you make an Ethiopian dance party?

Staple bread to the ceiling.

A kindergarten has a class pet, a mouse named Mister Squeaky

Mister Squeaky is a staple of the class, having been around for almost ten years. Every weekend, a different child takes him home to take care of him. One Sunday morning, a mom sees Mister Squeaky lying dead at the bottom of his cage. She rushes to the petstore and explains that she needs a replacement mouse. The man behind the counter pulls out a shoebox marked "MISTER SQUEAKY LOOK-ALIKES", pulls out a mouse and says "Here you go - that's the third one this month."

Staples Office Supply Super Store

A duck walks into a hardware store...

He asks the clerk, "Do you got any grapes?"
The clerk looks at the duck confused and says "Well, no this is a hardware store."
The duck shrugs it off and leaves.
The next day the duck returns to the hardware store, looks around and asks the clerk, "Do you got any grapes?"
The clerk kind of irritated asks the duck to leave, as there are obviously no grapes being sold at a hardware store. Ever.
Lo and behold the following day the duck enters the same hardware store and asks the clerk "Do you have any grapes?"
The clerk, having had enough of this tells the duck, "If you ever set foot in this hardware store asking for grapes again, I'm going to staple your beak shut!"
The duck leaves, only to come walking right back in moments later and asks, "Do you have any staples?"
The clerk looks at the staples shelf, "Hmmm, sorry we are all out"
The duck looks at the clerk, "Do you have any grapes?"

Staple joke, A duck walks into a hardware store...