Following is our collection of Standi jokes which are very funny. There are some standi stood jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these standi tall puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
...so that you start the new year off on the right foot!
I was in a public restroom earlier today and another man came in and commented that the some of the lights were burnt out. Then he said "I used to come in here for show and tell, but now it's more like search and rescue!"
He, she and his.
I was standing at the bar when a girl came up to me.
"Fancy buying me a drink?" She said,
"Sure," I replied. "If you let me choose."
"Okay," she grinned. "But how will you know what I want?"
"Well, it's kind of a talent," I smiled. "All I do is look a girl up and down and I know exactly what drink suits her best."
"Okay," she giggled. "You can choose for me."
So I turned to the barman and said, "Diet coke, mate."
it was a Louisville Slugger and I don't remember much after that.
It was a near-death experience.
Unbereavable.
Where it goes is up to you.
This FAT ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my behind and said,
"You're kinda cute. You gotta phone number?"
I said, "Yeah, you gotta pen?"
She said, "Yeah, I got a pen".
I said, "You better get back in it before the farmer misses you."
"This is the punchline."
You can explore standi restaurant reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean standi hand dad jokes. There are also standi puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Pondering about why a frisbee was growing larger and larger...
And then, it hit me
...I was stuck in the Pho queue.
I replied "Not sure, haven't decided yet".
I guess it's a hot commode-ity today.
Why does the frisbee get larger when it gets closer?
And then it hit me.
It was paintful
Turned out I missed a bus.
A fake name and a fake number.
Me: When is it due?
Her: 9 days.
Me: 9 days? F*ck that, I'll start walking.
And a black dude walks up to me and asked if i knew where the colored printer was. I told him "dude, it's almost 2018, use any printer you want."
I peeked at his PornHub account and his username was AJ1T_3.14Inches
This one that relaxes on its side isn't very useful.
Me: Standard murder suicide in regard to my ex wife.
Guy: Really? I don't see her anywhere here.
Me: I have dyslexia.
Then it hit me
Lex: This is the night I bury Superman!
Henchman: You've finally figured out his weakness?
Lex: Yes, this evening, I'll lure him into this tomb and he'll be incapacitated!
Henchman: How does that work?
Lex: It's his crypt-tonight.
Most likely neither will get you a successful career.
Pho Queue
The sign said: "Kicks for sale!"
I was standing in an elevator with a jew, when I farted he looked at me and I said "what? A little gas never hurt anyone"
The force of attraction between us just got four times larger.
...I love watching the end credits when I go to the movies.
Then it hit me.
The banker asks me "What can I do for you?". From the astonishment I didn't even pull out my gun.
Then it hit me.
God: Welcome my son
You........
God: You know why you're here, don't you?
You........
God: Tell me why you're here.
You: Because I was eating ass at a pool party during a global pandemic?
God: Because you were eating ass at a pool party during a global pandemic.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the standi smell jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working standi elevator piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.