Stag Jokes
45 stag jokes and hilarious stag puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about stag that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Laugh along with a collection of hilarious stag jokes. Whether you're a fan of the stag beetle, stag and doe, Archie the Antlered Deer, or hunters, these one-liners will have you in stitches. Share a joke or two with your friends and enjoy the humor together.
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Funniest Stag Short Jokes
Short stag jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The stag humour may include short fest jokes also.
- My boss went deer hunting. He winged a buck but ended up losing the trail. I messaged him oh deer, that must have been stag-gering when you fawned out you didnt get it .
- Postman told me he was going on holidays.... I asked him if it was Parcelona or Istampbul he was headed to...
Just said it was a stag do for his friend
Ah, an all mail party I exclaimed - So two stags are walking home from a gay bar. One looks at the other and says "I can't believe I just blew 50 bucks back there!"
- I had my stag do in Amsterdam. To remember the occasion my mates got me a sweater. I'd have preferred a moaner or a screamer, however.
- I was driving through a woodland area the other day and accidentally hit a stag It really spoiled the wedding
- I want to buy the most elevated premium male deer, but it doesn't need to have the highest prize stag.
- If Obi-Wan was a Jedi Knight who lived on Tatooine by himself... Does that make him a Stag Knight?
Share These Stag Jokes With Friends
Stag One Liners
Which stag one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with stag? I can suggest the ones about gang and stab.
- what did the stag say to his friend when he made a mistake? oh deer
- Why will you never see a stag on the internet? They like to stay anony-moose
- Why stags run a nation? Because they would always face an economic stagnation.
- What do you get a mathematician for his stag night? A parallelogram.
- What do you call h**...'s bachelor party? The r**...-stag!
Cheeky Stag Jokes that Will Make You and Your Friends Chuckle
What funny jokes about stag you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean stalk jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make stag pranks.
I was already on stage when I realized Take On Me was a bad karaoke song for me to sing...
It was a real Aha moment.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Five Stages of s**...
1st is Smurf s**.... This is where you do it until you're both blue in
the face.
2nd is kitchen s**.... This is the honeymoon phase where you do it in
every room of the house, including the kitchen.
3rd is bedroom s**.... This is after you've been married for a while,
maybe have a couple of kids, so you do it in the bedroom.
4th is hallway s**.... This is where you pass one another in the hallway
and say, "Screw you".
The final stage is courtroom s**.... This is where you go to court and
your wife screws you in front of everyone in the courtroom.
The stagecoach
Let me translate another surrealistic Russian joke.
A man is with a mistress. She says, "Let's do the stagecoach." "What's that?" "What? You don't know, what's a stagecoach? What are you doing with a mistress? Go ask your wife, maybe she'll tell you."
The man goes to his wife. "Honey, what's a stagecoach?" "What? You don't know, what's a stagecoach? How could I have married you? Go ask your grandmother, maybe she'll tell you."
The man goes to his grandmother. "Grandma, what's a stagecoach?" The grandmother says, "Ah, stagecoach, stagecoach..." and dies.
I have a personal sequel for this joke. In 1995 I was a newly hired developer working at Microsoft Office. I subscribed to the mailing list "Humor at Microsoft", translated and sent this joke there. The word "stagecoach" did not seem exotic enough for me at the time, so I substituted "aardvark". Somebody replied to the list asking, "What is an aardvark?" Somebody else replied, "What? You don't know, what's an aardvark? Go ask your manager, maybe he'll tell you."
The 4 stages of life:
My Stage Name is '999 Megabytes'.
I haven't gotten a gig yet
FOUR stages of girl & boy relation!
FOUR stages of girl & boy relation!
1. hand in hand.
2. that in hand.
3. hand in that.
4. that in that.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Stages of man's sexuality
1. Puberty: m**... in secrecy and shame.
2. Early adulthood: comfortable m**... in your room and some casual s**... with strangers.
3. First serious relationship: wild s**... all the time.
4. First years of marriage: steady and regular s**....
5. Marriage after children: m**... in secrecy and shame.
How can you tell when the stage is level?
The drummer is drooling equally from both sides of his mouth.
The three stages of life.
1) I believe in Santa.
2) I don't believe in Santa.
3) I believe in Santa and I know exactly who she is.
There are no stages to love...
You know the rules, and SO! DO III!
The three stages of writing a paper:
1. putin it off
2. stalin
3. russian to finish
No one on the stage production crew had checked the schedule for the day.
"I'm not making a scene, YOU'RE making a scene!!!"
Do you know the four stages of edibles?
I don't feel anything,
I don't feel anything,
I don't feel anything,
Take me to the hospital.
Three stages in the life of an average human..
1. Birth
2. What do others say?
3. Death!!!
What do you do when you have stage fright?
You go to the left.
I went to see a stage performer that does live sacrifices of celebrities during his act
I gave him 5 stars.
What is the first stage of grief for an Egyptian?
Denile.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Glasgow boys
Glasgow boys, Archie and Jock, are sitting in the pub discussing Jock's
forthcoming wedding.
'Aye, it's all going like magic,' says Jock.
'I've got everything organised already: the flowers, the church,
the cars, the reception, the rings, the minister, even ma stag night…'
Archie nods approvingly.
h**..., I've even bought a kilt to be married in!' continues Jock.
'A kilt?' exclaims Archie, 'That's grand, you'll look pure smart in that!
And what's the tartin?'
'Ach,' says Jock, 'I imagine she'll be in white.'
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was at my friend's stag party yesterday, when him and his brother handed me a glass full of yellow, lukewarm liquid. "Drink it!" they said giggling. It was only when I smelt it that I realized the prank the b**... were trying to pull...
Budweiser
Three stages for every trip
Planning
Discussing
Cancelling
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the best stage name for a stripper with no teeth?
Crystal m**...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
There are three different stages of marriage, said Dad to his son on the boy's wedding day.
When you're newlyweds, you have s**... wherever and whenever you want it. Then comes stage 2. After you've been married for some time, s**... is usually confined to the bedroom. And then comes stage 3. The most s**... you get is when you pass each other on the stairs and say 'Fuck off!'
A staggering drunk knocks over a pregnant lady who is carrying a bag of groceries...
2 eggs and a bottle of ketchup fall and break to the sidewalk. The drunk say "Sorry lady, but it would have died anyway. Its eyes were too far apart.
The three stages of a man's life.
1) tri-weekly
2) try weekly
3) try weakly
I saw a stage production of "The Three Pigs" yesterday.
The pigs were pretty boaring, but the wolf really brought down the house.
4 stages of life....
1) You believe in Santa.
2) You don't believe in Santa.
3) You are Santa.
4) You look like Santa.
4 stages of life
You believe in Santa.
You don't believe in Santa.
You are Santa.
You look like Santa.
My staggered into my house, sat down, and started sobbing.
(
How do you know if the stage is level?
The drummer is dribbling out of both sides of his mouth.
How do you tell if a stage is level?
There's drool coming from both sides of the drummer's mouth.
