Staff Meeting Jokes
12 staff meeting jokes and hilarious staff meeting puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about staff meeting that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Staff Meeting Short Jokes
Short staff meeting jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The staff meeting humour may include short office meeting jokes also.
- Why did the wizards show up to battle empty handed? Their weapons were at a staff meeting.
Yes, yes. Groan, downvote, and move on. It popped into my head and I shouldn't have to suffer alone. - In a school music department ... We need to have a STAFF meeting.
You are all causing a lot of TREBLE.
And the BASS CLEF is bringing all of us down.
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Howlingly Hilarious Staff Meeting Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening
What funny jokes about staff meeting you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean board meetings jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make staff meeting pranks.
George Bush swears he sees Moses in the crowd at a rally....
.....and he doesn't want to miss the opportunity to meet such a well-known biblical celebrity.
He yells at him, "Sir, you look a lot like a man from the old testament. Are you Moses?" Looking around, the man slowly shakes his head side to side denying the gesture. Bush is not convinced.. one more time he asks, "Sir, I don't see the need to lie to me; are you Moses?" Once again, a back and forth shaking of his head. Bush tells his security detail to interrogate him.
His lead security agent asks the man in complete confidence, "The beard, the cloak, the staff, the wrinkled skin... you look exactly like Moses." Moses replies, "Because I am."
Confused, the security agent asks, "Why didn't you just tell the president that then? What harm could it have caused?" As a matter of factly, Moses replies, "The last time I talked to a Bush, I was stranded in a desert for 40 years."
The Brazilian ambassador meets with Donald Trump
The Brazilian ambassador meets with Donald Trump, and offers him 50 Brazilian soldiers to help with the fight against terrorism. Trump says, That's fantastic!"
Later that day Trump calls his Chief of Staff and tells him about the offer of 50 Brazilian soldiers.
The Chief of Staff says, That's fantastic!"
Trump says, Yes, but remind me again, how many is a 'Brazilian?'"
Who Is The Real Boss?
The Boss of our small company was complaining during a staff meeting that people didn't respect him enough. Trying to change the attitude in the office he came in the next day with a sign for his door it said, I am the boss .
One of the employees apparently not appreciating the change posted a post-a-note on the sign it said your wife wants her sign back
It's old man Jenkin's 94th birthday at the old folks home
He asked a member of staff "young woman, how old are you?"
The woman replied "why, I'm 24"
Old man Jenkins says "do you know how many times 94 can go into 24?"
The woman says "I have no idea"
Jenkins whispers in her ear "meet me after scrabble practice and we can find out"
"A leader in the Democratic Party is a boss, in the Republican Party he is a leader." Harry S. Truman
The Boss was complaining in our staff meeting the other day that he wasn't getting any respect.
The next day, he brought a small sign that read:
I'm the Boss!"
He then taped it to his office door.
Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign that said: -
Your wife called, she wants her sign back!"
An elevator CEO and an economist are in a meeting
The CEO is worried about his profit margins, as the materials costs have been rising. He's almost breaking even.
He turns to the economist and says Fix this before we go under!
The economist looks over to him and says Have you tried cutting staff?
I can't do that. Our employees are important to us.
Have you tried new sources?
No one else makes them.
The economist thinks for several minutes. He turns back to the CEO and says,
Have you tried vertical integration? It would really elevate your profits.
Dubya meets Moses
George W Bush was sitting at an airport when he saw a strange man walking by.
He had long white hair, a long white beard, wore robes, and rocked sandals that clicked against the floor along with his staff.
Dubya got up and stood in front of him. "Hey, aren't you Moses?"
Moses pretended he couldn't see him.
Dubya asked again, but again Moses was looking away intently.
Finally Dubya grabbed the man's arm and said, "Why are you so unfriendly??"
To that Moses finally responded, "Last time I talked to a bush, I spent 40 years in the desert."
The crazy house is running low on space...
So the staff call a meeting to see how they can bring their numbers down. They decide a test is in order.
Unfortunately, traditional Q&A testing didn't yield the kind of results they wanted so they get creative and paint a door on the wall of the lounge area.
The next day they wait and watch to see which patients fall for it. Soon there are lines of crazy people trying to open the fake door. Some resist but still look on in bewildered curiosity except for one man in the corner of the room laughing hysterically. They approach him and ask what he finds so amusing...
Patient: "All the lunatics trying to open that door over there. That's pretty funny"
The staff starts to get excited. This seems promising.
Doctor: "Their behavior seems foolish to you huh?"
Patient: "Downright s**... if you ask me."
Doctor: "Can you please explain why?"
The patient motions for the doctor to come closer and whispers into his ear: "Because I have the key!"
Prince William visits the Royal Institute for the insane...
He inspects the facilities and has a cup of tea with the workers, just as his mother would have done. He then asks to speak to a few of the residents. The staff were hesitant to agree to the request, but seeing as he was the chief patron of the institute, they couldn`t say no.
After meeting a few crazy types, the prince found himself talking to a young man who appeared completely normal. The young man explained his situation, "Someone has made a mistake. I have no idea why I am here. As you can see from my behaviour I am perfectly fine and I could fit into the community immediately. I`ve written to a number of high ranking people but they refer me back to the manager here. I guess you are my only chance of getting released. Can you talk to someone on my behalf?"
Prince William was very impressed with the manner in which the young man spoke and promised that he`d do all he could for him. But as the prince got up to walk away and continue his tour, the young man punched him really hard in the back of the head.
The prince was stunned and turned to face the man who said, "That was just so you wouldn`t forget me."
During a recent staff meeting in Heaven, God, Moses, and Saint Peter concluded that the behavior of Ex-President Clinton and Representative Condit had brought about the need for an eleventh commandment.
They worked long and hard in a brain-storming session to try to settle on the wording of the new commandment, because they realized that it should have the same style, majesty and dignity as the original ten.
After many revisions, they finally agreed that the eleventh commandment should be: "Thou shalt not comfort thy rod with thy staff."