The Best 62 Stable Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Stable jokes. There are some stable hay jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these stable consistent puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 Funniest Stable Jokes and Puns
I like my women like I like my isotopes.
Stable.
Did you hear about the guy who was hospitalised for swallowing a horse?
Doctors have described his condition as stable.
The homeless man and the farmer
A homeless man comes up to a farmers house and knocks on the door, when the farmer answers, the homeless man asks "May i spend the night?" to which the farmer replies, "Sure, but you're going to have to sleep in the stable." So the homeless man agrees and sleeps in the stable with all the animals.
In the morning the farmer comes in and asks "How did you sleep?" and the homeless man says "I slept good. And I talked to your animals too." the farmer says, "Really?"
"Yes, I talked to the chickens," he responded, "and they said that you come in every morning at 4am to collect the eggs."
"Wow," the farmer says, "That's right!"
"I also talked to the cows," the homeless man continued, "And they told me every morning at 5am, you milk them"
"That's amazing!" the farmer responds.
"I also talked to the sheep, and they said-"
"THOSE SHEEP ARE LIARS!!!!"
A friend of mine has been rushed to hospital, after eating a horse-burger.
Apparently he is now in a stable condition.
So I went to a stable for a self confidence boost
I found myself surrounded by a bunch of neigh-sayers.
Why did the thoroughbred break up with the wild horse?
Because she was looking for a stable relationship.
Three wise men arrived to visit the child lying in the manger...
One of the wise men was exceptionally tall and bumped his head on the low doorway as he entered the stable. "Jesus Christ" he exclaimed.
Joseph said: "Write that down, Mary. It's better than Wayne."
I like my women like my kernels
about 6 years old and stable
A Halloween Limerick
A lady vampire named Mable
Had a period that was awfully stable.
So once a full moon
She took out her spoon
And drank herself under the table.
Ad in the local paper:
25 year old woman, very attractive, beautiful blonde hair, perfect measurements, intelligent, with good sense of humor and stable income - Selling dump truck.
Why do horses have such a low divorce rate?
Because they're all in *stable* relationships!
You can explore stable stability reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean stable barn dad jokes. There are also stable puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
The man at the circus.
A man is going to the circus to look for work. The man finds the manager in his caravan and asks him if he could get a job at the circus.
Oh, so you're looking to join the circus then? Tell me, what can you do?
I can mimic a bird, the man says proudly.
Hah, scoffs the manager, every single person at this circus can mimic a bird, even the slow stable boy, that's not anything we'd want here at this circus.
Oh well, says the man and flew out the window.
Where's the best place for a horse to grow up?
In a stable environment.
Sorry I'm high and it just came to me.
A limerick about a vampire named Mable. [NSFW]
There was a young vampire called mable,
whose periods were always quite stable,
at every full moon,
she took out a spoon,
and drank herself under the table.
Horse trainers have stable jobs.
Working with horses is hard
but it's stable work.
A chemist walks into a bar...
He says to the bartender, "Tonight all drinks are on me!"
The bartender says to him, "you must've had a good day today, what happened?"
"I finally found a way to make a stable molecule from a barium atom, two sodium atoms, and a sulfur atom!" the chemist proudly replies.
"Wow," says the bartender, "that's BaNaNaS!"
Why do women love men who work with Horses?
Because those men have got Stable jobs.
Did you hear about the man who worked with horses his whole life?
He had a stable job.
I guess uh.. I'll just leave
Studies have shown horses exposed to marijuana are less stable and unsafe to ride.
So get off your high horse.
A bartender walks into a stable
The horse says "Why the wrong place?"
Video games let you live out your wildest fantasies.
For example sims gives you the chance to have a stable job and own your own home
Got my first job today at a barn!
they told me the work was stable...
So I was in the emergency room
and while I was waiting for the doctor to come back I overheard a couple nurses at the nurses' station discussing another ER patient's case.
Apparently this dude had come in complaining of rectal pain. They took an X-Ray and found at least 8 toy horses in his colon. It sounded serious, but they described his condition as stable.
Recent research shows that horses tend to have much better mental health than other farm animals
Due to their stable environment
I was thinking of taking a new job where I'll care for horses all day. It's not a high paying job,
but it is a stable one.
If in an earthquake, take shelter with a horse...
Their houses are always stable
Do your horses smoke?
No.
Well, then I think your stable is burning.
What do you call someone with amazing equestrian skills?
A Stable Genius.
TIL Donald Trump personally built the barn for his daughters horses, and apparently he did a better job than most professional barn raisers do.
Guess you could say that makes him a stable Genius.
Earlier today, a man was admitted to hospital due to 8 plastic horses found in his stomach
His condition is now stable.
The doctor told me that my friend is in stable condition.
The room is filthy and there's horseshit everywhere.
What sort of Internet connection can you get in a barn?
Stable WiFi.
My wife is an equestrian and she uses the money she earns to pay for me to go to University and study Philosophy. One night she asked me to help out around the stable and I told her I would but only after I finished my readings.
She accused me of putting Descartes before the horse.
What's a horse's house called? A stable. What is a group of stables called?
A *neigh*bourhood
My uncle was kicked by a horse the other day
He's in stable condition.
I divorced my wife and bought a horse...
I'm finally in a stable relationship.
What's a horse's primary concern when voting?
A stable economy.
What's a horse's top priority when voting?
A stable economy.
Guy finds a magic lamp
He rubs it and out comes a genie granting him 3 wishes!
1st wish: I want a stable job
2nd wish: I want to be driving a costly vehicle
3rd wish: I want to be surrounded by ladies
Genie makes him a bus driver
My stable broke because I rushed when I was building it.
Guess I should hold my horses.
Doctor: your son is in a stable condition...
doctor: it's so stable, it will never fluctuate again.
Why don't horses use the internet?
They can't find stable connections.
A man was rushed to hospital with 6 toy horses stuck up his ass...
The doctors describe his condition as stable.
If we want Congress to agree we should just replace the people with horses
Sure the neighs would carry every vote. But hay, at least the housing market would be stable.
I'll show myself out
The internet connection at my farm was terribly slow, so I moved my modem to the barn...
Now I have stable wifi.
BREAKING NEWS: A man was presented into the ER after shoving 6 plastic horses up his ass...
Doctors say that his condition is stable.
The internet connection at my farm is really sketchy, so I moved the modem to the barn.
Now I have stable wifi.
It's not a good idea to have a horse as a pet if you live in a city.
They need to grow up ..in a stable environment.
Did you hear about the kid who was hospitalized for swallowing six of his plastic toy horses?
The doctor described his condition as stable.
What do you call it when two horses date?
A stable relationship
A horse walks into a bar...
The bartender says, "Why the long f--" when suddenly the horse cuts him off.
"I've heard that a million times. 'Why the long face, haha!" I hear that everywhere I go."
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that," says the bartender. "Other than that, how's your
life?"
The horse responds with, "Stable."
Horse walks into a bar, bartender asks why the long face?
Horse replies, The bank denied my home loan because I don't have stable income.
My therapist asked me How's your home life, stable?
I said No, just a small house down the street
A Racehorse walks into a bar...
The Bartender says, "Why the long face, your housing seems stable and your life seems on track?"
What's a horse's number one priority when voting?
The stable economy!
Why doesn't the horse go to the ICU?
Because he's in a stable condition.
A karen walks up to a stable in Bethlehem and says...
...I demand to speak to the manger!
My throat has been a little hoarse lately...
I managed to round up the ingredients for a herdal remedy, the medicine has reined it in and now I'm in a stable condition.
There is this doctor…
The doctor, recently had a patient with 76 toy horses up his ass.
The doctor said his condition was stable.
What do you call a doctor in a stable environment?
A veterinarian
Ok I got one,
What is a horses top priority when voting?
A stable economy
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the stable unstable jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working stable mable piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.