Square Root Jokes
125 square root jokes and hilarious square root puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about square root that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Square Root Short Jokes
Short square root jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The square root humour may include short square math jokes also.
- Holding a gun to his teacher, the student demanded, "Tell me the square root of -2!" The teacher begged, "Please, let's be rational here."
- What do the square-root of 2 and flat-earthers have in common ? They're both completely irrational.
- What's the square root of Minecraft? There's three, actually. The potatoes, the carrots, and the beetroots.
- What do I get when I pour my Root Beer into a square mug? Just Beer.
If you don't get it, think mathematically. - What is ISIS's favorite mathematical operation? Square Root.
Anything it is applied to becomes radicalized. - What is the similarity between women and square roots? If they are under 16 you should just do them in your head.
- My best friend told me he was planning on naming his son "Square Root of 2". Luckily his wife managed to convince him that would be completely irrational.
- I couldn't figure out why my data wasn't coming out like my classmate's, until I realized I dropped a square root in the formula. I put it back in and re-plotted the data. I saw a radical change.
- The square root of -1 walks into a bar. The bartender looks on, amazed, and says "This is unreal."
- I came home to my wife yelling "The square root of pi!" angrily. I told her she was being irrational.
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Square Root One Liners
Which square root one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with square root? I can suggest the ones about tree root and square shape.
- My girlfriend is like the square root of -100. A solid 10, but also imaginary.
- I poured root beer in a square glass. Now I just have beer.
- My Valentine is like the square root of -100... A 10, but imaginary
- I have a phobia of the square root of 2 It's just one of my irrational fears
- What's the square root of 69? Eight somethin'
- My GPA.. My GPA is the square root of -16.
An imaginary 4.0 - Q: What happened to the plant in math class? A: It grew square roots.
- Why do plants hate maths? Because it gives them squared roots
- Why shouldn't potato be a part of a square meal? Because It's a root vegetable
- What did the square say to the root? "Radical"
- How do you turn root beer into beer? Put it in a square cup!
- I asked my German friend if he knew the square root of 81. He said no.
- What do you call an uncool beet? A square root
- My girlfriend is like the square root of 99 I don't know that either
- How can you tell you are in a math teacher's garden? All the trees have square roots.
Hilarious Fun Square Root Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about square root you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean quadratic jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make square root pranks.
Do you know what the square root of 69 is? Ate something. (8.xxxxxxx....)
Are you the square root of -1? Because you can't be real.
What do Jesus and the square root of negative one have in common? They're both imaginary.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So the speed of light, e, and the square root of (-1) walk into a bar...
So the speed of light, *e*, and (-1)^1/2 walk into a bar. The speed of light heads over to the bartender and gets his drink pretty quickly, as he's wont to do. Then (-1)^1/2 goes and orders his drink, and *e* just flips out on him. The square root of -1 asks *e* what's wrong, and he says, "I came in here first, and you just went in front of me!" (-1)^1/2 just says, "Hey, man, I'm just following the rules here!"
Finally, the bartender gets fed up and says, "No, no, no, you idiot, it's *i* before *e* **except** after c!
So the square root of -1 is performing in a Broadway show
Suddenly, an audience member stands up and shouts "I'm sure everyone will agree that i could replace you!"
Whatever you do, don't tell this joke to a math person; they will just make you upset
Bill is a giant nerd, and he knows that he isn't perceived as cool; in fact, lots of people call him a square. So, in an effort to be cool, he finds some cool guys and decides to go do everything he can with them.
They say, "Hey Bill, we're going to the bar. Want to come?"
He says, "Sure," and comes to the bar. They all order shots and beers. Bill doesn't want to be a square, so he orders shots and beers, and they all have a great time.
Next week, they call Bill up and tell him that they're going to a club. Bill comes along with them. They all start grinding on women and ordering tons of booze. Bill doesn't want to be a square, so he does the same and has a good time.
The next week, they call Bill up and tell him that they're going to a football game. Bill doesn't want to be a square, so he comes along. The guys are all cheering for their team enthusiastically, but Bill just sits quietly in his seat. Finally one of the guys says, "Bill, this isn't like you. Everything else we've done, you've joined in happily. Why won't you root for the team with us?"
Bill replies, "Well, I don't want to be a square. And rooting? Rooting is for squares."
Why did the numbers 25, 36, and 49 go to the dentist?
For a square root canal
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Girls are like square roots...
If they're under 18 just do them in your head.
A man goes to the dentist for a root canal
The dentist asked him if he wanted has or novocaine to numb it.
The man says "Neither. I've only said ouch twice in my life."
Intrigued, the dentist asks him about it.
"Well," days the man, "Once I was out hiking and nature called. So I stepped off the trail and squatted over a log to do my business and set my nuts square in the middle of a bear trap. That was the first time I ever said ouch."
"Sounds horrible," the dentist exclaimed. "When was the second time?"
"As soon as I reached the end of the chain."
What's the best imaginary friend of all mathematicians?
Square root of minus one.
That girl that's the square root of -100...
...she's a perfect 10, but she doesn't exist.
The type of girl I want is the square root of negative 100
She's a perfect 10, but she's also imaginary
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Girls and square roots have one thing in common...
If they are under 13, do 'em in your head.
Square Root of Negative One and Pie.
The square root of negative one and Pi are having an argument. After a lengthy discussion the square root of negative one says: 'Will you just be rational?' To that pie replies: 'Get real.'
I realized today that the Vans logo looks like a square root symbol.
It's probably because they're so radical.
Today my math teacher taught us how to square root -1
It was unreal
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Punthagorean Theorem
A and B are pretty square, but get to the root of C and you'll find he's always high, p**... in use.
Maths Joke!!!
Whats yellow and impossible?
Taking the square root of a negative banana.
A group of 8 year old kids mysteriously get drunk at a slumber party
A boy has 5 of his friends over for a slumber party. His friends mom buys the kids two 2 liter bottles of Root Beer and begins serving it to the kids. Before the kids get through the first bottle they begin to act drunk, and the parents begin to notice that they smell like alcohol. One of the kids then throws up and the parents confirm that the kid has thrown up an alcoholic beverage. The parents set aside the rest of the Root Beer and call the police. The police arrive and inspect the rest of the Root Beer in the bottle from which the kids were being served. They find absolutely no trace of alcohol in the Root Beer, and are at first stumped, until one of the officers notices the glasses in which the parents were serving the Root Beer. The officer then looks at the parents and says "Here's the problem right here." Both parents look at each other, baffled. The officer concludes: "You served the kids Root Beer in square glasses."
A mathematic joke
One day, the square root of 16 came into a bar. He met the square root of 2 and they began a discussion. Later, the discussion fell on vaccines and the Square root of 2 told him that vaccines cause autism etc. Then, the square root of 4 told the square root of 16: "Don't listen to him. He's irrational".
What's a mathematicians favourite plant?
Any that has a square root!
Whats the square (root) of a (onion)???
Shallots ^_^
What's yellow and imaginary?
The square root of negative banana.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do women and the square root of 2 have in common?
They're both irrational.
How do you say no in German?
Square root of 81
The square root of 4761.
My obsession with square roots has got me on cloud three.
What's the final digit of the square root of 2 (√2)?
I don't know, sometimes radicals can be irrational.
What? The square root of some numbers give us a infinite non-recurring decimal?
That's absurd!
Are you the square root of -100?
Cause you're the only 10i see.
My social life is like the square root of -1
Completely imaginary!
What is the square root of a carrot?
Carrots don't have square roots; their roots have a circular cross section.
Why did the teenager like square root problems?
Because they're totally *radical!*
What kind of root is only easy to find on paper?
*A square one.*
Consuming alcoholic beverage is prohibited in my office!
So I sit down with root beer on a square table sometimes.
My friends are like the square root of -1
They're imaginary.
I can never be a fan of Negative People...
Squarely rooting for them is simply... Imaginary.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
For a change of pace, here's a limerick; "( (12 + 144 + 20 + 3 Sqrt[4]) / 7 ) + 5*11 = 9^2 + 0"
Sorry, did that not make any sense?
How about -
>"A dozen, a g**..., and a score,
>
>plus three times the square root of four,
>
>divided by seven,
>
>plus five times eleven,
>
>is nine squared and not a bit more."
I used to hate the square root of -1
but then I realized I was just imagining things.
Hilarious reply to hilarious 'I love you' proposal
It was just a casual talk with one of my best friends,when I told her
"*I'm a negative person will you be my modulus function*"(read it somwhere)
And her reply was
"*I'm a square root so cant take any negatives otherwise this whole thing will become complex*"
I got mathametic-zoned
Why is the set including the square root of 5 and the square root of 4 similar to the set including anarchism and authoritarianism?
They are both unlike radicals.
A mathematician walks into a bar
A mathematician walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a beer.
The bartender says, "Sorry but we've run out of beer. We have only root beer for today."
"No problem", replies the mathematician. "Just serve me in a square glass."
What's the square root of optimus prime?
I'm not sure, but it's more than meets the eye.
My waifu is the square root of -100
She's a perfect 10, but imaginary.
My wife is like the square root of -100...
A perfect 10, but completely imaginary
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call two Australian math nerds having s**...?
A square root.
My Girlfriend is the Square Root of -100
I like math.
My kid asked me what root beer was made of...
I told him beer squared.
Original joke. May have been made before but i thought it was ~~funny~~corny.
the square root of a depressed X
is complex
What's the square root of a hyper cube?
A sugar cube!
While Jesus can turn water into wine...
...the scientist can pour root beer into a square cup, resulting in just beer.
What kind of root doesn't get invited to a party?
A Square Root
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call really boring s**...?
A square root
What is the square root of Pai?
"To access your calculator's premium features like sine, square and square root, and logarithm, please call to have a contractor install the software"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My girlfriend is like the square root of -100
She's also s**... enough to click on a repost
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Even if my d were squared
My s**... life would still be root negative one!
When you square root a negative number the result is imaginary
Just like my friends
What's the difference between a regular tree and a tree owned by a mathematician?
The tree owned by a mathematician has square roots.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do you have s**... with a female mathematics teacher?
Subtract her clothes, divide her legs, square root her and she'll multiply.
What's a math class' favorite part of a plant?
The square roots.
Two mathematicians are talking to each other
Mathematician 1: so I herd you got a girlfriend, is she hot?
Mathematician 2: Yea she's a real square root of 100
Mathematician 1: Mine too, but -100
The Truth.
What is the square root of Chuck Norris?
Pain.
What is the square root of -1 with the power of god?
0.20787957635
What's the square root of -1?
My love life
Fancy a beer but are too young to buy it?
Buy rootbeer and put it in a square glass. The square cancels out the root and all that's left is beer!