The Best 29 Sprint Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Sprint jokes. There are some sprint medal jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these sprint derby puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Sprint Jokes and Puns

What's the proper procedure when witnessing someone having a seizure in a bathtub?

Sprint to your room, grab all the dirty clothes you can, and start saving money on laundry.

So I entered a race where we had to sprint the length of a 12 inch ruler

It was a foot race

How do the French Train for War?

The 100 Meter Sprint

What's a Russian's favorite service provider?


My new record in a 100 m sprint

Is 52 meters.

What do you say to sprinter jumping from 100 meters tall building committing suicide?

... I'm sure you gonna break your personal best.

Chase Elliott will never win a Sprint Cup Series race.

He will win a Monster Energy Cup Series race.

Sprint joke, Chase Elliott will never win a Sprint Cup Series race.

Sprint should rename their company

To slow jog

Did you hear about the wedding for the CEO of Sprint?

The service was alright, but the reception was downright terrible.

I saw on the news that the CEOs of T-mobile and Sprint got married last weekend. Great wedding,

terrible reception.

That new sprint slogan

Just works for me!

You can explore sprint metres reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean sprint raced dad jokes. There are also sprint puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

I just got a new personal best in the 100 metre sprint!

73 metres.

Why is the company going to be called T-Mobile instead of Sprint after the merger

Because when they whipped it out, T-Mobile had the bigger stock

My parents are mixed-race..

My Dad prefers the 100m sprint and my Mom prefers the 400m hurdles

My sprint team complained that the hurdles were too short

I told them they would get over it

My first time having sex was like the olympic 100 meter sprint.

Not because it was over in 10 seconds, but because it included 8 black men and a gun.

Sprint joke, My first time having sex was like the olympic 100 meter sprint.

Why are Mexicans and Olympic Athletes so similiar?

They both know to sprint at the sound of a gun.

If you could exterminate any race what would you pick?

Personally, I'd get rid of the 800m. It's too long to be considered a sprint and not long enough to really be long distance.

Why did the turtle go to AT&T

because he couldn't sprint

Why doesn't Mexico perform well in the Olympics?

Because anyone who can swim, jump, climb, or sprint is already over the border.

I'm gonna go ahead and make a racist comment by saying..

I think the 400m relay is a better race than the 100m sprint.

What do sprinters eat?

They don't. They fast.

If every time I need to throw up I sprint to the toilet... what point does it become a running gag?

What do sprinters eat before their run?

Nothing, they fast.

What do sprinters eat before a race?

Nothing, they fast.

I will see myself out.

If you could get rid of any race, which would you choose?

I'd pick the 400 meters, it's too long for a sprint and it's too short to be a true endurance race.

Sprint joke, If you could get rid of any race, which would you choose?

What does a sprinter eat before a race?

Nothing, they fast!


It's okay to hate a race.

I, for example, hate 100m sprint!

The other night...

...I was walking home and there was this female walking in front of me. She looked behind her and then started walking faster, so I walked faster. She then looked behind her again and started to walk even faster, so I walked faster. Then she started to run so I took off running as well. She then broke out into a sprint whilst screaming at the top of her voice so I also did the same.

To this day I still don't know what we were running from but it was pretty scary.......

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the sprint footrace puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working sprint runner piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes