Spouse Jokes

Funniest Spouse Short Jokes

Short spouse jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The spouse humour may include short wive jokes also.

1. Did you hear about the guy whose spouse was hit by lightning? His entire wife flashed before his eyes.
2. Why did the accordion player get a divorce? His spouse couldn’t handle the constant bellowing.
3. Why are women called a "widow" when their spouse dies, but a man is called "widower"? Do men have to be better at everything?
4. My friend tried to enlist the help of his spouse in our dad-joke contest... She failed miserably, making no decent jokes.
   I said, "looks like you brought a wife to a pun fight."
5. Monogamy is having one spouse. Polygamy is having more than one spouse. Monopolygamy is marrying the Monopoly Guy.
6. Why did the sun's spouse leave it? Because it kept acting like the world revolved around it.
7. A concerned friend asks a guy why he just endures his marriage with an abusive spouse. He just shrugged it off and says, "beats me."
8. The divorce rate has now reached 50%. That means statistically speaking, either you or your spouse are going to end up divorced.
9. There's an international multi-event competition for military spouses, but the same team wins every year. The Swiss Army Wives.
10. Spouses are a lot like FBI agents They won't ask you a question that they do not already know the answer to.

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Spouse One Liners

Which spouse one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with spouse? I can suggest the ones about hubby and wife hubby.

1. What do South Koreans call their spouses? Seoulmates
2. how do you turn a screw into a bolt? the spouse comes home.
3. My spouse told me to stop making animal puns or leave.. I guess alpaca my bags then
4. When mediums get drunk and all sentimental... They call their future spouses.
5. How do trucks get spouses? Pickup lines.
6. Can one get Slovenian citizenship through a spouse? Asking for a President.
7. What do you call a Slavic spouse? Czech-mate
8. Finding out my spouse was disabled and incontinent... Was a wife-changing experience.
9. What's an anime with adultery? Cory in the Spouse
10. What do you call a spouse of 30 years? A stalemate.
11. What did the ghost give his spouse for their anniversary? A boo k.
12. where does a cheating spouse take their mistress to a fair
13. Spouses should take note from Playstation Network. Now it knows how to go down.
14. Why are lucky golfers able to cheat on their spouses? They always have good lies
15. I love waking up to the sound of birds arguing with their spouses.

Cheating Spouse Jokes

Here is a list of funny cheating spouse jokes and even better cheating spouse puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I asked a friend of mine who cheats on his spouse how he sleeps at night. He responded "With your wife, John"
• Did you hear about the two people with OCD who were cheating on their spouses to be together? It was a sorted affair.
• What did the woman say to her cheating spouse? Stop explaining!
• Is it still adultery.... ...if you cheat on your spouse with a child?
  -&y (oh yeah - one of my own)

Amusing & Witty Spouse Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun

What funny jokes about spouse you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean husbands and wives jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make spouse pranks.