A man is sitting in a restaurant and calls the waiter over.
Man: Try the soup.
Waiter: What is wrong with the soup? Is it too salty?
Man: Just try the soup.
Waiter: Is the soup too hot?
Man: Just try the soup!
Waiter: Is the soup too cold?
Man: JUST TRY THE GODDAMN SOUP!!
Waiter: Fine. Where's the spoon?
Man: That's the problem.
Heard this one at work today:
A married couple are sitting down at dinner when the waiter comes up to their table and asks what they would like to eat. The wife and the husband both order a soup, but before leaving the wife notices a spoon in the waiter's shirt pocket, and he walks away before she gets a chance to ask. The waiter comes back with the soups, and the wife asks the waiter "Why is there a spoon in your pocket?". The waiter replies "Well Ma'am, studies show that the spoon is the number one utensil that gets dropped on the floor, so management figured that if we keep a back-up spoon in your shirt pocket, that it would be quicker to replace it that way it saves a trip." The wife says "Alright that makes sense." The waited says he'll be back in just a moment, it is at this point the wife notices a string coming out of the waiter's zipper area. The waiter comes back to see if everything is alright, and then the wife asks "Why is there a string coming out of your crotch?" The waiter replies "Well when we go to the bathroom, we use the string to pull our penis out so that why we don't have to wash our hands." The wife replies "Well, that makes sense I suppose, but how do you get it back into your pants?" The waiter replies "Well, I don't know what everyone else does, but I use a spoon."
A man and his wife were seated in a restaurant, when the man noticed that all the waiters carried two spoons in their vest pocket.
Curious, the man asked their waiter the reason for this.
"Well, sir," the waiter explained, "an efficiency study conducted by the management determined that the most frequently dropped silverware item is a spoon. Therefore, all waiters carry two spoons so that the item can be instantly replaced."
As the waiter was offering the explanation to the couple, they noticed there was a string hanging out of the fly of his pants.
"What about that?" the man asked, discreetly pointing to the string.
"That, sir, is the result of another efficiency study." the waiter replied.
"When we need to go to the bathroom, we use the string to pull ourselves out and aim. Therefore, we do not have to stop to wash our hands."
"I understand how you can get yourself out and aim," the man said, "but how do you go about getting yourself back in?"
"I don't know about the other waiters, sir," the waiter replied, "but I use the two spoons!"
A cereal killer.
They like to mix it up.
guess that makes us a pair of cuddelery.
A fork in the road
Oui-ja
But if you fork the wrong dish, you could get knifed.
fork it.
That's 2 spooky 4 me.
Skeletones.
" Well I don't have a punchline"
What soup?
It's knife to meet you. You wanna fork.
The knife then says, I can't there's to much on my plate.
Macabre
People generally like spooning in bed with an other individual. I think that's highly overrated thing. Instead, you should try silver spooning with someone. That's the real shit.
There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it
When he went to bed he gave himself head
And spit all the spoo in a bucket
November 8th.
BOOze
I'm shocked that nobody said bust a Slimer
It had a concavity.
BOOgatti veyron
DOOT DOOT
Bamboo.
And now that that they're back, they are UNDEAD.
Lake Erie.
and she says to me, "Am I the little spoon?"
I said "No, you're more like the cake tin."
Didn't go down well.
Now I can't rape a Feminist by looking at them!
I would forking her.
make the insulin go down?
unless your a diabetic.
Abortions.
What is the spookiest make-up?
Mas-Scare-AHHHH
No guts.
mr skeltal
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