The Best 57 Sponge Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Sponge jokes. There are some sponge krusty jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these sponge dad puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Sponge Jokes and Puns

A mother takes a bath with her 5 year old boy

The boy sees her bush and asks, "Mommy what is that?" The mother, thinking quickly, simply says, "Why that's my sponge, sweetie." The boy then says, "Oh yeah! The babysitter also has one." Apalled, the mother asks, "How do you know something like that?" The boy responds with, "I know because I saw her washing daddy's face the other day."

Why can't Spongebob make the honor roll?

Because he's a C sponge!

Why couldn't Spongebob get a mortgage?

Because his house was underwater.

Sponge joke, Why couldn't Spongebob get a mortgage?

Little Billy came home early from school to find his mom naked, just getting out of the shower...

"Hey mom, what's that bushy thing between your legs?" he asked. "Oh that's just my sponge," his mom replied. A few days later Billy had a friend over, "mom, show Tommy your sponge." Billy's mom replies, "oh, I can't, I seem to have misplaced it." Billy says "oh I'll go ask the babysitter where she put it, I saw her cleaning daddy's face with it the other day."

SpongeBob

Wait, I just realised something. SpongeBob lives in bikini bottom, and he's absorbent: oh no...


Woman in a coma

Two nurses are giving a woman in a coma a sponge bath. They notice that when they get near her private areas that she starts to get a little stimulated. The theorize that oral sex will bring her out the coma. They go out into the lobby and tell her husband their theory. The husband is a little aprehensive about it at first, but he agrees to do it. The nurses leave the man with his wife and give him some privacy. They come back about 10 minutes later and the woman is dead! "What happened?" asks one of the nurses. The man replies, "I dont know...I think she choked."

A woman is in a coma and her nurses are giving her a sponge bath

They notice when they get near her lower area that her vital signs improve a little. They think oral sex may bring her out of her coma. They go in the waiting room and tell her husband their theory and assure him they will have complete privacy. The nurses leave and come back 15 minutes later and the woman is flat-lined. What happened?? Yelled the nurse. Her husband replies, I don't know...I think she choked.

Sponge joke, A woman is in a coma and her nurses are giving her a sponge bath

LPT: Easy way to soak up that extra alcohol in your stomach!

Throw up on a sponge.

What do SpongeBob and LeBron James have in common?

They both hit the deck and flop like a fish.

A boy is in the shower with his mum.

The boy says, "Whats that hairy thing mum?"
Mum replies, "That is my sponge."
"Oh yeah," says the boy, "The babysitters got one too, she likes to wash dad's face with it!

What do you call a civil rights activists who's also a shower sponge?

Martin Loofah King

You can explore sponge foam reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean sponge swab dad jokes. There are also sponge puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


A boy is in the bath with his mum and asks

"What's that hairy thing?"

Mum says, "That's my sponge dear"

The boy says, "Oh yeah, the babysitters got one too. I have seen her washing Dads face with it."

*washing car with son*

Son: can't you just use a sponge

What do you call a daydreaming shower sponge?

Aloof-ah!

Why did the nurse cuddle with her locked-in syndrome patients right after their sponge bath?

Because she likes her vegetables at the peak of freshness

One day a dad was washing the car with his son.

The son said, "dad, can't You just use a sponge?"

The dad said "no son this builds character."

Sponge joke, One day a dad was washing the car with his son.

What is 4 inches long and expands when there's a women in a running shower?

A sponge

A little boy was in the bath with his mom.

The boy said "What's that hairy thing, mommy?", She replied, "That is my sponge honey". "Ohhh," said the boy, "The babysitter has one too. I saw dad washing his face with it!"

If SpongeBob is absorbent and lives in bikini bottom

then I'm pretty sure that makes him a tampon


What did one one sponge say to the other sponge?

Nothing. They were too aloofa.

A man is washing his car with his son. The son asks:

"Dad, can't you just use a sponge?"

A woman is taking a bath with her daughter

The daughter looks down and asks her mom, what's that?

The mother replies, oh that's just my sponge

And the daughter says, oh! The baby sitter has one too and daddy's always washing his face with it

I really enjoy a nicely deconstructed Black Forrest cake

It's fantastic, I just leave out the cream, the chocolate, the sponge and the cherries, allowing me to enjoy the wholesome Kirsch

What did the sponge say to the sink?

Water you doing?

What do you call an antisocial sea sponge?

Aloofah

A sponge walks into a bar and does not order anything

Are you not going to order anything? Asks the bartender

The sponge quickly replied

I'm too holy

Spongebob was the most unrealistic kid's show

A teenager in a minimum wage job owning a house and car. Pfft

A young boy is bathing with his mother

Boy says, Whats that hairy thing mom?

Mom replies, That is my sponge.

Oh yes, says the boy, The babysitters got one, I've seen her washing dads face with it.

How many blondes does it take to wash a car?

Two. One to hold the sponge, and one to drive the car back and forth.

Momma's little black sponge

I was washing my car with my friend.

He asked if I could use a sponge instead.

A man is washing his car with his son...

...after a while the boy says to his Father Dad, why can't we just use a sponge?

Spongebob might be the main character

But Patrick is the real star.

Why is Spongebob the main character

When Patrick is clearly the star?

What do you call a selfish sponge?

Self absorbed

Wow are you a sponge?

Cause you're self absorbed

I was washing my car with my friend...

when my dad came outside and asked "Why don't you just use a sponge?"

What do you call it when you injure someone with a shower sponge?

An oofa loofa

What does SpongeBob say when he's angry?

I square to god!

The water problem in Africa is like someone put a sponge block from Minecraft in the stream.

Dad washing a car with his son...

Both of of them using a sponge because that is what you're supposed to wash with and having a good time.

I had to clean all my whetstones yesterday

Now my sponge can cut through glass

a father and Son were spending some quality time washing a car,

the son looked up to the father and asks;

"why can't you just use a sponge?"

To make a Real sponge cake

Borrow all the ingredients.........

A man is washing his car with his son.

His son looks at him and says,

Dad...Why can't you use a sponge?

A little boy is in the bath with his mum and asks her what the hairy thing he found in the water is?

* Oh, that's just mummy's sponge * she replies
 

* Ah thought so * says the little boy * The baby sitter has got one of those, I've seen her washing daddy's face with it! *

A father is washing the car with his son

After a moment the son asks his father: "do you think we could use a sponge instead?"

I once knew an arrogant sponge.

he was very self absorbed.

Do you know how easy it is to make a Victoria sponge topped with pepperoni and melted cheese?

It's a Pizza cake

A man is washing his car with his son, when the boy says...

"Dad, can't you use the sponge?"

I washed the car with my 5 year old son today.

When we finished, he said, Next time dad, can you use a sponge?

Me: *washing car with son*

Son: Dad, can't you just use the sponge?

A Dad is washing the car with his son

The son asked "why can't you use a sponge?"

A man is washing his car with his son.

Son: Dad, can't you use a sponge?

A father was washing his car with his son

And the son says, dad, can't you use a sponge?

How come Spongebob is the main character?

When Patrick is the star.

A dad washes his car with his son.

Son-dad why can't you use a sponge

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the sponge basin jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working sponge mop piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes