Spin You Jokes
121 spin you jokes and hilarious spin you puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about spin you that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Spin You Short Jokes
Short spin you jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The spin you humour may include short spins jokes also.
- How many Irishmen does it take to change a lightbulb? Two.
One to hold the bulb, and one to drink until the room starts spinning. - How many American conservatives do you need to screw in a lightbulb? Ten.
One holds the bulb, the other nine wait for fox News to spin it. - How do you make a Chinese man no longer Asian? Just spin him around in circles until he's disoriented
- How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to hold the bulb and one to drink until the room spins.
- How many morons does it take to change a lightbulb? 14,000.
1 to hold the lightbulb, 4 to hold the chair, and 13,995 to spin the house. - How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Not sure, first they have to figure out which way to spin it.
- In ancient times, people watched the earth spin for 24 hours. They got bored though, so they called it a day
- Ninja Joke Can a viking throw an axe?
Sure he can.
Can a cowboy throw a lasso?
Sure he can.
Can a ninja throw a spinning blade?
Shuriken. - How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 5
1 to hold the bulb and 4 to spin the ladder. - My 5 year old's original joke My son came up with this one. Clever, I thought.
What has one wheel, spins, but never moves?
A Ferris wheel.
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Spin You One Liners
Which spin you one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with spin you? I can suggest the ones about spinning wheel and pins.
- I love the way the Earth spins on its axis. it always makes my day.
- If you take an Asian man and spin him around 3 times... Does he become disoriented?
- How do you get the Asian out of a China man? Spin him around until he's disoriented.
- If you spin an Asian person around, what do they become? Disoriented.
- What animal spins around about 200 times after it dies? A rotisserie chicken
- If you spin an Asian man around really really fast... Does he become a disoriental?
- What is empty and spins round and round? A Malaysian Airlines baggage claim.
- What do you call it when everyone spins round once? A communist revolution.
- If there's no God... ...then who spins the plate in microwave?
- What do you call Michael J. Fox spinning around in a chair? A fidget spinner
- Why did the male spider spin a web? So he could catch all the fly ladies.
- I really like how the earth spins It really makes my day
- I always found the movie "The Exorcist" confusing... It made my head spin.
- Did you hear about the Spanish Star Wars spin-off? It's about the chosen Juan.
- What's green and red, and spins at 1,000 RPM? A frog in a blender.
Spin You Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about spin you you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean fidget spinner jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make spin you pranks.
How many alcoholics does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to hold the lightbulb in place and one to drink until the room spins.
How many Irish men does it take to change a light bulb?
One but he has to be drunk so the room spins around while he holds the lightbulb.
What do you call Bob Ross spinning around in circles at a theatre play?
Aphrodisiac
Depressed race car mechanic.
Scene: a psychiatrists practice:
'Doc, I'm a mechanic I work for a racecar driver. It's utterly depressing ... I get to fix his car up, maintain it, tune it to perfection. But never -not once- have I been allowed to take it for a spin. It's crushing a depressing to think that such a wonderful thing is out there purring, but I'll never get to enjoy it. ...'
'Well sir, I think I understand just fine, my brother in law has the exact same problem.'
'Is he a mechanic too doc?'
'No, a gynecologist'
A blind man walks into a bar with his seeing eye dog.
He then picks up the dog by it's tail and spins it around over his head. The bartender exclaims "What on earth are you doing?!" The blind man replies "Oh, I'm just looking around."
So I tried using one of those date r**... drugs the other night...
It turns out its really hard to r**... a girl when you're drooling on the floor the room is spinning.
My two favorite "screw in a lightbulb" jokes
**How many irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?**
21. 1 to hold the bulb, and the rest to drink whiskey until the room spins.
**How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?**
Just Juan.
So did you guys hear that Farrah from Teen Mom has a s**... video?
It must be a prequel spin off.
A daughter is seemingly possessed by a d**......
Her mother frantically calls their priest, requesting an exorcism. She describes the details "She has been spinning about wildly, climbing on the walls, running on the ceiling.. moving about non-stop!" The priest replies "I don't know what you want me to do. Sounds like she's already exercising plenty!"
How many marxists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
IMPOSSIBLE! They only know how to spin things to the left.
If you think politicians are the best at 'spin'...
you should listen more at funerals.
A blind man walks into a store with his guide dog
Takes the dog by the tail and starts to spin it around. A guard immediately comes to him and demands why is he doing this, to which the blind man answers: "No need to get agressive I'm just looking around!"
While browsing broom section at grocery store with girlfriend...
Me, to older man also browsing: "you think the cheap $4 ones work just as well as the $12 ones?"
Older man, without missing a beat: "I don't know, ask her to take it for a spin."
Wheel of Nostradamus
A man was at the fair when he heard a carnie shouting "Step right up and spin the Wheel of Nostradamus and win a prize!" Intrigued, the man approached and asked how much for one spin.
"Only five dollars per spin, sir."
Outraged, the man asked why it was so expensive. The carnie replied:
"I'm trying to turn a prophet here!"
How many talking heads does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. One to hold the bulb, and another to spin the story until the bulb fits.
How many social justice warriors does it take to change a lightbulb?
One. They just hold the lightbulb and cry until the universe spins around them.
A blind man
A blind man walks into a store with his service dog. He goes to the middle of the store, picks the dog up by its hind legs and starts spinning around. Everyone in the store stops and stares. The store manager immediately runs up to him and says "Sir, can I help you find something?" The blind man, still spinning with the dog, says "nope, just looking around."
How many dwarves does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two; one to hold the bulb and the other to serve him beer until the room starts spinning.
How do you make the letter "H" healthy?
You spin it.
It becomes spin-h.
juh-jen
What happens if you spin an oriental person around really fast for an extended period of time?
They become disoriented.
What do you call a spinning, bisexual dinosaur that loves Juno & Superbad?
Biceratops
How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One to hold it in place and forty more to get drunk enough to make the room start spinning.
dead baby jokes
Q. whats more fun than spinning a dead baby around at 50mph?
A. stopping it with a shovel.
How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
17, 1 to hold the lightbulb, 1 to hold the ladder and the other 15 to drink whiskey until the roof spins
What do you call a spinning potato?
A ro-tater.
My Car spinning uncontrollably thru a crowd of people
And My Korean friend screams "Hit the Blakes" & I'm like "I can't be that selective"
If my wife were a car, she'd be a Ferrari.
I paid through the nose for it but only take it out for a spin maybe once a month.
... Also, I wish I had a Ferrari.
Young boy: Mommy, Mommy I can't stop spinning in circles!
Mommy: Shut up, or I will nail your other foot to the floor too!
What happens when you spin an Asian around?
He becomes disoriental
A blind man walks into a bar with his sight dog..
He then takes the dog and starts spinning it around by the tail. The bartender asks "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" The blind man replies "Just looking around."
What happens when you spin an oriental around?
They get disoriented.
Since we're doing old jokes: How do you stop a baby from spinning around in circles?
Nail it's other hand to the floor.
If my grandmother knew how much money i spent on her f**...
She'd be spinning in her ditch
I love the way the Earth spins
It really makes my day.
Why was Jesus hanging around the spinning teacups carnival ride?
He was taking away the sins of the whirled
Husband takes his wife to a disco.
Husband takes his wife to a disco. There's a guy on the dance floor dancing like a king –moonwalking, break dancing, head spins, the works. The wife turns to her husband and sighs: "You see that man? 25 years ago he asked me to marry him and I said no."
Husband says: "Yep, it looks like he's still celebrating!!"
How to start a revolution with change?
Just take a coin and give it a spin.
Little kids are like fidget spinners
They're overhyped.
Oh yeah and they spin easier when you stick something metal through them.
Whats more fun than spinning a baby around on a clothesline?
Stopping it with a shovel ;;)
What is a politicians favorite setting on a washing machine?
The spin cycle.
How many drunks does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to swig till the room starts to spin.
What's the hardest part about fidget spinning?
Telling your parents you're gay.
A young boy says to his father, "Dad, why does the dog spin in circles when she's excited?"
The boy's father replies, "Because it's very hard to spin in squares."
When I spin around my s**... desire increases.
I think it's an aphrodizzyac.
A blind guy walks into a store with a seeing-eye dog.
All of a sudden he grabs the dog by the tail and start spinning it around over his head. Horrified, a shopkeeper rushes over to him and says sir, sir are you OK?
The blind guy says sure, I'm just looking around.
How can you tell if your girlfriend is too fat?
She keeps getting picked in spin the bottle
Why do Fox News and CNN journalists go to the same gym?
It has a really great spin class.
A propeller is a big fan
A jet's propeller is basically just a big fan to cool down the pilot. Once it stops spinning, you can see him start sweating.
How many Kennedys does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Four. One to hold the bulb and three to drink until the room starts spinning.
A group of lads go out for a night and then go to a cowboy themed bar.
When they go in they see that the bar has installed a spinning bull. They all have a go and the bull spins them around and they all fall off within 30 seconds.Up steps p**... and he jumps on the bull and he stays on for 10 minutes before falling off . The rest of the lads ask how he managed to stay on for so long and he replies
"my wifes epileptic"
Can you perform a spinning dragon uppercut?
shor-yu-ken
Last week, a burglary was reported at the fairgrounds
The burglars appear to have taken the bumper cars, the Tilt-a-Whirl, the spinning teacups, the Whirligig swing, the carousel and the Ferris wheel. Detectives have been searching the fairgrounds for clues, but report they still haven't found anything to go on.
I've started wearing a bike helmet, cause I find safety important. Now people stare and make fun of me.
I'll never go to that spinning class again.
A blind man comes into a store.
He takes his guide dog by the tail and spins it over the head. The saleswoman asks: "Can i help you Sir?" "No thank you", the man replies, "ill just have a look around."
Ryu wanted to confess to his lady-crush Chun Li....
So he baked some white fudge treacle tarts and put them down on a table. Ken walked up and was like, "ooh, these tarts smell delicious" and he started to pick one up, when Ryu grabbed the whole plate and did a jumping-spinning kick at Ken while yelling "THESE TARTS AREN'T FOR YOU KEN!"
If they put Jesus on a fidget spinner...
Would he have died for our spins?
Super stoked for the new Cosby Show spin-off...
Pudding it in Cosby.
Two kinda oldish guys visit a casino...
And they arrive at the Roulette table. "Hey, what number should we bet on?" "I dunno. How often do you have s**... in a week?" "12 times." "AWESOME! Me too! Let's bet on 12!".
The ball spins around and around and finally settles on the Zero.
Moral: Be honest.
An old lady walks into an Apple store with a dripping wet MacBook in hand.
She finds an employee and tells him that her MacBook wouldn't turn on after she cleaned it. The employee looks at the MacBook and sees that it's soaking wet.
Ma'am did you wash it with water? He asks.
Yes but I don't think that's what killed it. Replied the old lady.
Than what killed it? Asked the employee very confused.
The Spin Cycle.
What's the fastest spinning country?
France, because it has the most revolutions per minute.
My parents spin a world globe and randomly point out their next vacation destination.
That's how they drowned.
I thought I wouldn't like m**... while spinning in my desk chair.
But I'm coming around to it.
How many astronauts does it take to screw a light bulb?
One but it will take several others to prevent the spacecraft from spinning in the same direction.
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From my book *400 Fresh Clean Jokes For Everyone*.