Spiderman Jokes
116 spiderman jokes and hilarious spiderman puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about spiderman that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Looking for funny spiderman jokes? Check out our collection of hilarious spiderman jokes that will make you laugh out loud!
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Funniest Spiderman Short Jokes
Short spiderman jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The spiderman humour may include short venom jokes also.
- Why is spiderman so good at comebacks? Because with great power comes great response ability.
- I watched Into The Spiderverse and I wondered how Spider-Man always comes up with his witty comebacks. Then it it me with great power comes great response ability.
- If Wonder Woman and Spiderman went into business together would they call it Amazon Web Services?
- What do Spiderman and I have in common? We both end up with sticky hands after using the web.
- You guys heard about this new Spiderman restaurant? Don't bother bringing cash. All the orders are web only.
- What did Spiderman say when he worked at MacDonalds? With minimum wage comes minimum responsibility.
- What's black, white, and red all over? Some people say it's a news paper, I say it's Spider-Man.
- Did you know the Green Goblin decided to turn good and team up with Spider-Man? Yeah, he's now Willem Dafriend
- Why does spiderman always have the best comebacks? With great power comes great response ability!
- Dad: "Son, do you know why Spider-Man is so good with his quips?" Son: "Why dad?"
Dad: "Because with great power comes great response ability"
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Spiderman One Liners
Which spiderman one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with spiderman? I can suggest the ones about peter parker and mary jane.
- Why does Spiderman hate driving with his evil twin? Because he's a bad parallel Parker
- What is the one thing Spiderman can't eat? Uncle Bens rice.
- What does Spiderman do when he's not fighting crime? Web Development.
- Spiderman: Just another guy who ends up with sticky hands after using the web.
- What do you call Spiderman when he parks his car? Peter Parker
- Why is Spider-Man a bad boyfriend? He's super clingy.
- Why did spiderman's evil twin fail is diver's test Because he was a bad parallel parker
- Why are Spiderman stickers the stickiest? They don't peel so good.
- I'm half Spiderman, half Batman Half without superpower, half without money
- What would be a more appropriate name for spiderman? Peter parkour.
- Why is there no Australian Spider-Man? He didn't survive the bite.
- Why does Spider-Man only have 11 months on his calendar? Because he lost May…
- What was that Spiderman quote again? With great reflexes, comes great response ability.
- I can't believe AntMan and Spider-Man are in civil war. That really bugs me.
- What disorder will Spiderman get as he ages? Peter Parkinsons
Spiderman Dark Jokes
Here is a list of funny spiderman dark jokes and even better spiderman dark puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do you call skid marks on Spider-Man underwear? The Dark Web
- what is the place from which they bought the black spider-man in the movie 'Spider man into the spider verse The dark web
- What does Spiderman use when he wants to be stealthy? The Dark Web
- Spider-Man Spider-Man Does whatever a spider can
Everything's, going dark
"I don't feel good Mr. Stark"
Oh nooooo, there went Spider-Man
Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Spiderman Jokes with Friends.
What funny jokes about spiderman you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean uncle ben jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make spiderman pranks.
Why was Spider-Man found sleeping on the roof of an old rundown power station?
No power, no responsibility.
What does Spider-man wear when it gets cold out?
A Peter Parka
Why doesn't Spiderman like rice?
It reminds him of Uncle Ben.
someone tried to tell stan lee this joke during his panel at comic con this week end
what do you call spiderman when he quits the daily bugal and starts working as a valet?
peter PARKER.
Where's Spiderman's home page?
On the world wide web
What is Spiderman's perfect job?
A web designer.
^^^^^sorry!
What's Spider-Mans favorite online music app?
Spotafly.
Why do the Avengers keep calling Spiderman over to fix their computer?
Because they heard he's a web developer
Why does Spider-Man only drink Kool-aid?
Because with grape powder comes great responsibility.
What does Spiderman like to get high on?
What superhero should you never have dinner with?
Spider-Man. He never saves any Uncle Ben's.
I've nicknamed my grandad Spiderman.
He doesn't have any superpowers, he just can't climb out of the bath.
The entire plot of spiderman
A teenage boy finds out he can shoot white stuff out his body
The last twenty five years have been a bizarre time to grow up.
For instance, i've lived through more 'Spiderman' re-boot than legitimate presidential elections.
We call my grandpa "Spider-Man"
He doesn't have any super powers, he just finds it hard to get out of the bath
Why is Spiderman gay?
He's a Peter Parker.
Why did Spiderman open a retirement account?
He wanted to turn his Spidey cents into Spidey dollars.
I met Spider-Man in college
He was in Web development.
Peter Parker was at home alone one day, when suddenly aunt may walks in on him m**....
I guess she was the first person to see Spiderman home coming.
What's spider-mans favorite brand of rice ?
Uncle Ben
What do you get when you cross Iron Man with Spiderman?
Pony Park
What does Spider-Man do after he gets hurt?
He checks Web MD
What do Spider-Man and Metallica have in common?
Both have had an experience of entering Sandman
I used to be flexible back in highschool. In fact all my friends called me Spider-man...
mainly because my uncle was murdered.
In Need of a Pun
Alright, so I need help coming up with a spiderman-themed pun to ask a girl to Prom. I'm going to be holding a sign with the pun-loaded question while dressed as Spiderman. Help is greatly appreciated.
To keep the mods happy, I'll give you a joke:
A dyslexic bar walks into a man, bartender long face asks him "Why?"
We used to call my Grandad spiderman...
He wasn't agile, he just couldn't get out of the bath.
I call my Grandpa, Spiderman. Not because he has superpowers,
he just struggles to get out the bath.
What did Spider-Man say when he was deployed to the Middle East?
Iraq, no phobia
Do you know what spiderman would name his dog?
Peter barker
Hey girl you must be like spiderman cause
You don't look too good...
In Spider-Man, I always considered Harry's father an ally..
A shame he ended up as Dafoe.
I was quite flexible and fast when I was younger. The kids at school used to call me Spider-Man.
Because my uncle was murdered
Why did Spider-Man go to the hospital?
Because he didn't feel so good.
Guess who missed Spiderman homecoming?
Uncle Ben.
What was the true identity of the Greek Spider-Man?
Pita Parker
So when Spiderman produces a white sticky substance it's "cool"
Why is it whenever I produce a white sticky substance I'm considered a "massive pervert"?
Yesterday I heard someone complain that there is no lesbian representation in marvel
Which makes no sense because the shocker has been a spiderman villain for years
When Spiderman shoots a sticky substance all over someone he's "amazing"...
But when I do it I'm a pervert.
What do you call spiderman after he lost his powers, but still jumps from building to building?
Peter Parkour
(-my brother)
What do Game of Thrones, The Walking Dead, and Spider-Man all have in common?
They're more realistic than The Bachelor.
When we were children, we used to refer to our Grandad as Spiderman.
He didn't have any special powers, he just couldn't get out of the bath without any assistance.
When I was a kid, I wanted to be like Spider-Man
but now I want to be like Uncle Ben
What does Spider-Man do on his day off?
Surfs the web
Spiderman designed a new outfit that he can wear to formal occasions.
It's a class action suit.
Why America failed to save the world from Coronavirus
Thor is in Asgard
Ironman died
Captain is now old
Hulk doesn't have much power. Rest of the Avengers are suffering from Corona and China ate Spiderman and Batman.
What does Spider-Man and your mouth have in common?
They're both Peter Parkers.
Did you know that Spider-Man has a winter jacket made out of Mediterranean flatbread?
It's a pita parka.
Who called it Spider-Man trilogy and not..
A web series.
Spider bite created Spiderman. What would a dog's bite create?
Doberman.
Spiderman began using firearms a few days ago
Everyone told him that it's not a good idea but he is sticking to his guns
Dr: "I have some good news and some bad news Spiderman. The good news is that the constant tingling sensation isn't your Spidey sense warning you of some huge, impending calamity!"
"What's the bad news Doc?"
"Well son, what do you know about g**... h**...?"
What's Spiderman's favorite hobby?
Web designer
What would you call if spiderman starts jumping around buildings instead of swinging using his spider webs?
Peter Parkour
spider-man: weird your rug looks just like a giant piece of paper
**me [sneaking up behind him with an enormous cup]:** that 𝑖𝑠 weird
Who is Green Goblin in Spiderman?
Dafoe
Why is spider-man so good at making quips??
Because with great power comes great response-ability.
What Marvel Superhero is the best at HTML?
Spiderman.
What do you call a Spiderman villain who eats a lot?
Green Gobblin'.
We used to call our Grandad 'Spiderman', not because of his agility or that he was a superhero...
It's because he couldn't get out the bath by himself.
Why'd the alternate universe Spider-Man do so well on his driving test?
He's an excellent parallel Parker.
Do you know why Spiderman is bisexual?
Because he swings both ways.
Why did Spiderman refuse to come down from the building?
Because he had no way home.
