Sperm Donation Jokes
67 sperm donation jokes and hilarious sperm donation puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about sperm donation that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Sperm Donation Short Jokes
Short sperm donation jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sperm donation humour may include short blood donation jokes also.
- Me: When i donate blood i do not extract it myself. A nurse does it for me Receptionist: Yes, but this is a s**... bank and it doesn't work that way.
- TIL s**... donors are paid $50 per donation. It was devastating. Imagine all the money that has slipped through my fingers.
- "When I donate blood, I don't extract it myself..." "... the nurse does it for me."
"I understand stand sir, but this is a s**... bank, it doesn't work that way here." - I read that donations to s**... banks have dropped dramatically... It's probably because, these days, most men do their banking online...
- I didn't know you could get paid for donating s**.... When I think of all the money I've let slip through my fingers...
- When the nurse declined his request... He simply said
**"When I donate blood I don't extract it, the nurse does"**
And walked out of the s**... bank. - Man: Why do I have to do it myself? I've donated blood before and a nurse draws it. Receptionist: Yes sir, but this is a s**... bank, it doesn't work like that here.
- A man is donating at his local s**... bank, right as he finishes the doctor walks in.... covers his eyes, and says dont worry I didnt see nuttin
- Have you heard the one about the two Irishmen who went to London to donate s**...? Patrick missed the tube and Shamus came on the bus.
- I tried donating s**... the other day, but they refused me. The requirements they have are really strict there at the salvation army
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Sperm Donation One Liners
Which sperm donation one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sperm donation? I can suggest the ones about kidney donation and donation.
- Why are s**... donations more expensive than blood donations? They are hand made
- Why is s**... donations are more valued than blood donations? Because they're hand-made
- Why do s**... donations cost more than blood ones? Because they are done by hand.
- Why couldn't the poor man donate at the s**... bank? He was too low income
- Why is a s**... donation more expensive than a blood donation? Cuz' it's hand made.
- When I found out you could donate s**... by post... I came in a jiffy
- A s**... donator, a carpenter, and a married man walks into a bar He came, he saw, he left
- Donated s**... the other day Now I have a few 'mil' in the bank
- I went to a s**... bank to make a donation. This guy in the lobby came with me.
- I should really start donating to the local s**... bank I've got loads to offer.
- How does a gay man give a donation at the s**... bank? He farts in the cup.
- I used to donate s**... all the time! But im not allowed in that goodwill anymore :(
- Why is s**... donation more expensive than blood donation? Handmade things are costlier.
- Where do snowmen go to donate their s**...? The snowbank.
- A p**... walks to a s**... bank to donate her spit It worked
Sperm Donation Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about sperm donation you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean blood donor jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make sperm donation pranks.
A man walks into a s**... Bank.
He approaches a man who has just walked out of a donating cubicle.
He decides to start a conversation with him.
He approaches the man and says "So then, do you come here often?"
The man replies "Only when the internets off" and walks off.
I tried to donate s**... once, but they didn't accept it ...
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They said it had to be my own, and f**... it into the cups doesn't count.
Donating s**...
A man and a woman were waiting at the hospital donation center.
Man: "What are you doing here today?"
Woman: "Oh, I'm here to donate some blood. They're going to give me $5 for it."
Man: "Hmm, that's interesting. I'm here to donate s**..., myself. But they pay me $25."
The woman looked thoughtful for a moment and they chatted some more before going their separate ways.
About a week later, the same man and woman meet again in the donation center.
Man: "Oh, hi there! Here to donate blood again?"
Woman (shaking her head): "Mnph Mnph!"
Blood Bank
A guy was running for an elevator and he stuck his hand in to stop the doors, and the doors opened. Inside stood a woman.
He said, "Good morning, which floor are you going to?" She responded, "3rd floor." He pushed the 3rd floor button, plus the 5th floor for himself.
As the elevator started moving the gentleman struck up a conversation and asked the woman where she was going.
She said, "I'm going to the blood bank on the 3rd floor; I donate blood once a week for $10 to supplement my income." Then she asked the
gentleman where he was going.
He responded, "I'm going to the s**... bank on the 5th floor; I donate s**... there once a week for $50 to supplement my income".
The next week the same scenario happens. He stopped the elevator doors with his hand, the doors opened and the woman was standing inside.
He smiled and greeted her and asked if she was going to the 3rd floor?
At this point in the joke, the teller raises five fingers and makes a suitable mouth-full-of-s**... noise.
I hate it when people bother me...
I'm tired of people ringing my doorbell at all hours of the day and night, asking for donations. This morning it was some woman from the s**... bank. Boy, did I give her a mouthful!
A lady came to my door the other day, asking for donations to my local s**... bank..
I gave her a right mouthful.
A woman is donating some blood to make a little extra money . . .
She heads to the hospital and gets on the elevator with a man about her age. They say hello and she tells him she is heading to the 4th floor and asks if he would push the button for her. He clicks the button and also hits the 6th floor button for himself. A few weeks later the woman returns to the hospital to donate and again runs into the same man. As they enter the elevator he clicks the 4th and 6th floor b**... and asks her why she is at the hospital again. She tells him that she makes $50 by donating blood and asks why he has returned to the hospital. He tells her he makes $100 donating s**.... The following month they once again end up on the same elevator and as they enter the man asks the woman, "4th floor?". She shakes her head and says with a full mouth, "No m goin to da shixth floor"
News: Man dies of heart attack while donating to a s**... bank
He came and went at the same time
John is in an elevator and another woman enters.
John is in an elevator and another woman enters.
He politely asks, "Which floor?"
The woman replies, "Third please."
He replies, "Oh, are you donating blood at the blood center?"
"Yes, I am! Just need some quick money, having kind of a financial crisis."
"Oh I see. Same here actually, but I'm going to the fifth floor to donate s**.... It pays more."
The elevator reaches the third floor and they say goodbye.
A week later, John comes back, enters the elevator and sees the same woman running to it.
John asked, "Third floor, I suppose?"
"Fifth, actually." She replies, with a mouth-full.
Where do you go when you need a s**... donation?
Sasha Grey's mouth
A guy walks into a hospital and sees a really attractive female with brunette hair sitting down.
And sits right next to her to make conversation.
Guy:Hi, What are you here for?
Girl:I am donating blood.
Guy:How much are they giving you for your blood?
Girl:$50 for a pint, what about you? why are you here?
Guy:Oh, I am donating s**....
Girl: Cool, how much are they giving you?
Guy:$300
Girl:Wow *surprised/shocked face*
Then the two go there separate ways. The next day the female walks into the hospital and sits next to the same guy she met yesterday and the guy says "Are you donating blood?"
And the girl whose mouth cheeks are puffed up shakes her head no
A joke I heard from a regular customer.
A woman donates her plasma for some extra cash.
There is a man in front of her in the line for the cashier. She notices that his check is for $200 as he leaves. She excitedly gets to the cashier. To her surprise, the cashier hands her a check for $50. "Wait a second," asks the woman, "how come he got $200 and I only got $50?"
"Well ma'am, you donated plasma and he donated s**...," replies the cashier.
"Oh I see" says the woman.
A week goes by and the woman returns to the donation center. The same cashier is working again. "Oh it's you again," says the cashier, "back to donate more plasma?"
The woman shakes her head no and says, "uh uh", carefully keeping her mouth closed.
Could have been a rich man
A man was sitting at a bar, morosely staring at his untouched beer. The bartender walked over and asked, "What's the problem, pal?"
"My brother just told me there's a s**... bank in his neighborhood that pays $40 for a donation."
"Yeah, so?" "Don't you realize?" the man cried. "I've let a fortune slip through my fingers! -
A man and a woman were waiting at a hospital donation centre.
The man asks the woman, "What are you here to donate?"
The woman replies, "I'm here to give my blood. The hospital is going to pay me $5 for it."
"Good on you! I'm here to donate s**...," says the man, "The hospital is going to pay me $25 for it."
The woman woman looked thoughtful for a brief moment and they chatted some more before going their separate ways.
Several months later, the same man and woman meet again in the donation centre.
The man asks the woman, "Here to donate blood again?"
The woman shakes her head with her mouth closed and replies with a muffled, "Unh unh."
So the prophecy says that your son is fated to m**... you. You laugh until .....
you remember you used to donate s**...
A man steps onto an elevator with a woman inside...
He asks her, "Where are you headed today Miss?"
She says, "I'm on my way to the blood bank to donate blood."
The man asks, "How much do you get for that?"
She responds, "$20."
He then says, "Really? I'm on my way to the s**... bank, they pay me $100."
She looks angry about that, and then they part ways.
The next day the man gets on the elevator again to see the same woman. He says, "What a coincidence seeing you again. Where are you headed today?"
She responds, "To the s**... bank." with her mouth full.
-when I donate blood I don't have to do it my self, the nurse does it..
-yes but this is a s**... bank and it's different
-awful service
A girl and her boyfriend go to the hospital...
The girl goes in to the hospital to donate plasma. The boyfriend goes in to donate s**....
Once they're finished, they get back together and discuss their profits. The girl says, "I got $30 to donate some plasma." The boyfriend then says to her, "I got $125 to donate s**...." Enraged, the girl says, "That is so unfair!"
Two days later the girl returns to the hospital and the doctor asks, "Ah, you again, are you here to donate plasma?" With her mouth full girl shakes her head and says "Mm-mm."
So I walked into a s**... bank the other day to donate a sample
Someone donates one kidney and is hailed as a hero.
I donate s**..., and get arrested? guess the recipient has to be awake to receive it.
A man is attempting to donate s**... at a s**... bank...
... but he's having difficulty finishing, and so takes a while.
Eventually he manages, so he screws the lid on, and heads back into the reception to deposit the cup.
But by now a long line has formed with other men attempting to do the same thing - all the way to the door.
Furious, he marches up to the receptionist at the front of the line and says, "This is unacceptable - I can't wait this long, I have places to be! I need you to process my sample right now."
The receptionist turns to him and replies, "I'm sorry sir, but you'll have to go to the back of the line; we have a strict first-come first-served policy."
To any of you Idiots still using condoms and afraid of getting a glorious STI, I ask you this.
Can **You** donate to a blood bank and s**... bank by jacking off?
A man and a woman are chatting in an elevator.
"What are you up to today?" he asks.
"I'm going down to give blood."
"How much do you get paid for giving blood?"
"About $20 a pint."
"Hmm ...," the man, says. "I'm going up to donate s**..., and the s**... bank pays $100 a tablespoon."
The woman gets a strange look on her face and gets off the elevator.
The next day, they meet in the elevator again.
The man asks, "So, where you off to today?"
"Fmerm mank," she says, with her mouth full.
A man is leaving the s**... bank at which he just donated and chats with the receptionist...
Man: Have a good day! And thanks again for that glass of milk earlier!
Receptionist: Wait wait wait... what milk?
M: The glass of milk that was sitting on your counter
R: Oh no... you drank the last of my milk
Why is it always crowded in a s**... bank?
Because people are paid to come.
Why'd you think s**... donations are really expensive, because they're handmade
But Its hardwork tho, it takes alo of b**... to do it, whatever you thing you on regular that's nutting.
Donations
A man was sitting at a bar, morosely staring at his untouched beer. The bartender walked over and asked, "What's the problem, pal?" "My brother just told me there's a s**... bank in his neighborhood that pays $50 for a donation." "Yeah, so?"
"Don't you realize?" the man cried. "I've let a fortune slip through my fingers!"
Guy says to a receptionist at the clinic.
Guy: When I donate blood, I don't extract it myself, the nurse does it for me.
Receptionist: I understand sir, but this is the s**... bank, it doesn't work that way here....