spelled Jokes

funny jokes and hilarious spelled stories

What are the best Spelled puns and pranks?

Did you ever wanted to prank someone about Spelled? Well here is a complete list of Spelled to have fun with:

Why is 'dark' spelled with a k and not with c?

Because you can't see in the dark

Badambum!

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So God's getting ready to go on vaction...

And he's packing his bag and an angel comes up and asks, "So, where are you going to go for your vacation?" And God says, "Huh, not Earth again, last time I went there I got this Jewish girl pregnant and they haven't stopped talking about it since!'

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Entrance Exam

A recent entrance exam for Medical School included several questions that would determine eligibility.

One of the questions was "Rearrange the letters P N E S I to spell out an important part of the human body that is more useful when erect."

Those who spelled 'spine' became Doctors.

The rest ended up in Congress.

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Medical School Entrance Exam...

When I was young (100 yrs. Ago) and my intent was to go to medical school, the entrance exam included several questions that would determine eligibility.



One of the questions was "Rearrange the letters P N E S I to spell out an important part of the human body that is more useful when erect."



Those who spelled "SPINE" became Doctors. The rest ended up in Congress.

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My cat freaked out when I told him he was adopted.

Granted, I spelled it out on the floor with a laser pointer.

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Poor Ajmal.

After playtime, Ms Wilson asks some of her kindergarten kids what they did during playtime.
"What did you do at playtime Tom?"
"I played in the sandpit" said Tom.
"Very good, if you can spell sand, I'll give you a cookie!"
Tom spelled sand and was given a cookie by Ms Wilson.
"What did you do at playtime Sally?"
"I played in the sandpit with Tom" said Sally.
"That's nice, if you can spell pit, I'll give you a cookie!"
Sally spelled pit and was given a cookie by Ms Wilson.
"What did you do at playtime Ajmal?"
"I tried to play in the sandpit, but Sally and Tom threw rocks at me!" said Ajmal.
"That sounds like blatant racial discrimination, If you can spell blatant racial discrimination I'll give you a cookie!".

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Election and erection are spelled very similarly.

They also have similar meanings, a dick rising to power.

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Why is dark spelled with a k, and not a c?

Because you can't see in the dark.

Courtesy of my 14 year old this evening.

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If I ever have a daughter I want to name her Noe.

It would be pronounced like Noel and spelled the same but with no 'L'.

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Saul Epstein was taking an oral exam in his English as a Second Language class...

Saul was asked to spell "cultivate," and he spelled it correctly.
He was then asked to use the word in a sentence, and, with a big smile,
responded: "Last vinter on a very cold day, I vas vaiting for a bus, but
it vas too cultivate, so I took the subvay home."

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Little Tut is having a Hieroglyphics class in Ancient Egypt.

The teacher dictates: "Our Pharaoh, King of the Kings, Son of Ra, strong as a crocodile and manly as.."
And Tut, from the back of the class, asks:
-How many balls is "manly" spelled with?

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What word in the English language is always spelled incorrectly?

Incorrectly.

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The Texan Massacre

A Texan went up to the airline check-in counter and said, "Howdy, ma'am. My name's Brown, spelled B-R-O-W-N. Ah'm from Dallas, Texas. Ah'm 6-foot 3-inches tall. Ah'm white from the top of mah head to the tip of mah toes, and I hate the Irish."

She didn't know what else to do, so she took his ticket and showed him onto the plane.

He sat down in his seat, and turned to the fellow next to him, "Howdy, suh. My name's Brown, spelled B-R-O-W-N. Ah'm from Dallas, Texas. Ah'm 6-foot 3-inches tall. Ah'm white from the top of mah head to the tip of mah toes, and I hate the Irish."

The little fellow turned to him, "Well now, how d'ye do. My name is Patrick Michael O'Donnell. I'm from Dublin, Ireland. I'm 5-foot 6- inches tall, and I'm white from the top o' me head to the tip o' me toes, except for my rectum, which is brown. Spelled B-R-O-W-N."

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What word is always spelled wrong?

Wrong

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Did you know Canada was originally going to be called "CND"?

When they were asked to spell it, they spelled it: C-eh. N-eh. D-eh.

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Hi, my name is Typo!

It's spelled 'Tpyo'.

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What did Eminem say when his label spelled his name wrong?

It doesn't Mather.

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Why is dark spelled with a 'k' and not a 'c'?

Because c represents the speed of light.

(Just my version of a joke I saw on here)

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What is woman spelled backwards?

Kitchen

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Bollywood

What's the reason Bollywood Cast parties are awkward?

They think Cast is spelled with an e.

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What is "Woman" spelled backwards?

Kitchen.

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What terrible class of humans should you avoid mixing with or talking to and can be spelled with the letters I N G G E R S?

Gingers

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An American in London

A tall, American man wearing a "'Merica Fuck Yeah" shirt is walking down the street in London. A Englishman walks up to him, and in a posh, Oxford accent says,

"Sir, there is a spelling mistake on your shirt. It's spelled 'Mercia.'"

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Subscriber

Text conversation:
GF: Babe I think.. I'm pregnant
BF: The subscriber yu are trying to reach is no longer in service.
GF: You know you spelled "You" wrong
BF: The subscriber you* are trying to reach is no longer in service

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How to write in Japanese

* be me

* have weeaboo friend who thinks they're basically japanese

* tell them you can write fluent japanese

* they write their name in english and japanese

* tell them they spelled it wrong

* draw big semi circle and half cylinder over their name

* "You can't see your name through the mushroom cloud"

( อกยฐ อœส– อกยฐ)

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TUMS

HAS ANYONE ELSE REALIZED THAT TUMS SPELLED BACKWARDS IS SMUT? WELL, IN ADVERTIZING THEY SAY SEX SELLS

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Have you heard of an astronaut gerbil?

It's spelled with two S's.

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TIL: "Boobytrap" spelled backwards is "Party boob."

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What's therapist spelled backwards?

tsipareht

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Hieroglyphics

How many balls is "manly" spelled with?

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A white man, an asian man, and a black man died and went to see St. Peter...

As they approached the podium behind which St. Peter stood, he informed them that in order to enter in, they must each correctly spell a word of his choosing, or face an eternity of torment.
The white man volunteered to go first.

"Spell cat," said St. Peter.

"C-a-t, Cat," spelled the white man, beaming with pride.

"Well done, you may now enter into the joy of our Lord," said St. Peter.

The other two men became excited, and the asian man volunteered to go second.

"Spell off," said St. Peter.

"O-f-f, off!" exclaimed the asian man.

"Well done, faithful servant of the Lord, you may now enter," He said with a smile.

Almost erupting with joy, the black man stepped forward.

"Okay," he shouted,"I'm ready for my word now!"

St. Peter smiled and said,"Spell chrysanthemum."

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Black people started wearing their pants low

White people started calling it "saggin". What's "saggin" spelled backwards? White people are tricky

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CONCLUSION

You've read some of the best spelled jokes of all time. Most of the stories are suitable for kids with good sense of humor, children or teens boys and girls, of course dads. You must supervise kids not to read pranks for adults. Note that some jokes are disgusting, filled with black humor so don't tell dirty spelled gags to your kids. These jokes are updated with new ones in December 2019.

How do I make my girlfriend or boyfriend laughs? Well, this list of funny stories will make you cry in laughter. Some of these spelled jokes are funny and some are hilarious.

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