The Best 11 Speedo Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Speedo jokes. There are some speedo swim jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these speedo sweatshirts puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Speedo Jokes and Puns

What do they use to track Olympic swimmers' speed?

A speedo meter.

When I was fourteen years old, my father gave me an advice for my swimming lessons..

I listened, went to the lesson and after coming back, I talked to him.

Me: "Do you remember what you said earlier? You should put a potato in your speedo to impress the girls! I did that."

He: "So, how did it work?"

Me: "Well, you should've told me to put the potato in the front of my speedo."

Guy goes to a costume party dressed in a Speedo with a potato in the front. He knocks on the door of the party and the host says what are you suppose to be?

He says, I'm a dictator

Speedo joke, Guy goes to a costume party dressed in a Speedo with a potato in the front. He knocks on the door of

Why can't a man waltz in a closet while wearing a tight Speedo?

Because there's no *ballroom*.

What does Sonic the Hedgehog wear when he goes to the beach?

A speedo


Why did Speedo end its sponsorship of Ryan Lochte?

It doesn't like it when people try to hide stuff.

What do you call someone who is fast in a swimming pool?

Speedo Gonzales.

Speedo joke, What do you call someone who is fast in a swimming pool?

What do you use to tell how fast an Olympic swimmer is going?

A speedo meter

What did the sloth wear to the swimming pool?

His speedo

Ryan Lochte just filed a police report...

He stated Speedo pointed a gun at his head and robbed him of his endorsement deal.

Thank god Chris Christie wasn't wearing his Stars'n'Stripes speedo on the beach yesterday...

Puerto Rico, Guam, the U.S. Virgin Islands, and the Marianas would've been automatically granted statehood.

You can explore speedo sweatpants reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean speedo bikini dad jokes. There are also speedo puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the speedo swimmers jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working speedo swimwear piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes