Following is our collection of Spanish jokes which are very funny. There are some spanish porque jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these spanish tapas puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.
When a beautiful young girl in a miniskirt walks by. Just as she passes them a breeze comes along and lifts the girl's skirt up revealing she's not wearing panties. The French man looks at the Spanish man and says "C'est la vie" and the Spanish man exclaims back "Se la vi, tambien."
Roberto.
it told me i didn't have enough people in the car
I tried telling my boss a corny joke but he said he didn't get it because it was too 'American'(his words not mine). So i told him I'd find a joke in Spanish and try telling him it. I want to make my boss laugh so help me out guys! So if you know any work friendly jokes in Spanish post them here with a translation. Thanks!
How often do I tell chemistry jokes? Periodically.
Is Silicon the same in English as in Spanish? Si.
The last time I told a chemistry joke there was no reaction.
Chemistry puns Im in my element.
What do you do with a dead chemist?
Barium
Ion-estly cant think of anymore... All the good ones Argon!
Edit 1 just thought of this.
What does Barium Cobalt and Nitrogen make?
BaCoN
And just like that, the Spanish magician was gone without a tres.
A Mexican man finds a much needed job and asks the owner to hire him. The owner says he'll hire him ONLY if he can come up with a sentence using 3 words of his choice. The words are Green, Pink and Yellow. So the Mexican thinks for a second then replies (read in a Spanish accent) the phone goes Green Green, so I Pink it up and say Yellow?
Jajaja
The ΒΏQuΓ© QuΓ© QuΓ©?
A spanish magician gets on stage and says "I will disappear in 3 seconds." He counts: "Uno, Dos." And he disappeared without a tres.
You can explore spanish eso reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean spanish english dad jokes. There are also spanish puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
So there's this Spanish magician right and he says "I'll make myself disappear on the count of three".
"Unos..... Dos...." *BANG!" in a cloud of smoke he disappeared without a Tres.
A paragraph.
Because he's not a full essay.
Rough translation from Spanish:
Child:Mom, why am I dark if my father's skin is alabaster and yours is too?
Mother: With how drunk I was that night it's a miracle you don't bark!
The cop asked, "Do you know how fast you were going?"
The photon said, "c."
I went to see a Spanish magician and he told the crowd that he could make himself disappear on the count of three.
He started counting.
"Uno! Dos!"
And then he was gone. Without a tres.
Nobody expects the Spanish text edition.
The Spanish Inquisition.
"I completed a jigsaw puzzle in record time!"
"No way! How long did it take you?" Replied her friend
"6 months"
"That cannot be a record time!'
" Well the box said from 1 to 3 years"
Sorry for bad English, original was in Spanish
The Spanish Inquisition.
They take the seΓ±or discount.
He begins his trick for the birthday girl, grabbing a handful of magic sprinkle dust. He then begins to count, "uno, dos," POOF.
He disappeared without a tres.
Applicant:Well I discovered aliens, outside my house and managed to learn their language.
Interviewer:That seems rather complicated...
Applicant:Well Spanish isn't hard to learn sir.
Nobody expects the Spanish in position.
Yes, Oui, Si, Ja
I asked him if the word is masculine or feminine
And a stunning gorgeous woman seats by his side. He's the eager to start a conversation.
"So, what are you doing in Paris?"
"I'm a scientist, I research sex"
The man is now tempted:
"What have you discovered about sex in your research?"
"I came to find that Native Americans have the longest penises and Spanish can last the longest in bed. By the way, I'm Carol, what's your name?"
"I'm Sitting Bull Hernandez, nice to meet you"
was just introducing itself in Spanish
He thought Manual labor was a Spanish musician
The barman looks up and asks "We don't serve wine here"
Jesus looks at him quizzically and goes to look for a Spanish translator because he had just immigrated from Mexico and English was not his first language.
IT'S THE SPANISH INQUISITION!
Goooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllllll
sabe inglΓ©s?"
"si"
"como se dice 'un zapato' en inglΓ©s?"
"a shoe"
"salud"
"gracias
Some Spanish guy named "Manual"... A copy of his autobiography, printed in multiple languages, comes free with every electronic device or machinery... although much of his life story is lost in translation.
Dad: Son what are you drinking?
Son: Soy Milk
Dad: Hola Milk, me llamo Dad
Nobody expects the Spanish Acquisition
A Pedrophile.
He says uno, dos... then POOF, he disappears without a tres
He come out late at night to ring people's doorbells.
Because nobody suspects The Spanish Inn Physician
And then he disappeared without a tres
It really means a lot
He counted from uno to dos and disappeared without a tres.
Q: What do you call a person who speaks 3 languages?
A: (Try to elicit responses..) Tri-Lingual.
Q: What do you call a person who speaks two languages?
A: (Many of them know this one) Bi-Lingual.
Q: What do you call a person who speaks one language?
A: An American!
One student goes for the French student, and the whole time she screams, "Oui! Oui! Oui!"
The other student gets with a Spanish student, and she screams, "SΓ! SΓ! SΓ!"
The teacher locks a German student in his office, the whole time she screams, "Nein! Nein! Nein!" He replies, "Really? I could have sworn you were only eight years old."
People are amazed at how good the tattoo artists are in Spain........
They weren't expecting the Spanish ink precision
No one expects the Spanish ink precision
And *Poof*..... He disappeared without a tres.
"For my next trick, I'll disappear into thin air. Uno, dos."
And he vanished without a tres!
Nobody expects "The Spanish Inquisition".
Ciudad
it means a lot to them for sure.
She meant nothing to me
He can't say 'please' which I think is poor for four
He still can't say "please" though, which I think is poor for four.
It means alot to them
Why? Because nobody expects the Spanish ink precision!
He still can't say 'Please' though, which is poor for four.
Soy sauce.
Which I think is poor for four
It means a lot to them
Uno.
Reincarne
He replied, CC
What covid is doing is just plaguerism.
Nobody expected the Spanish ink precision...
But I ain't no snitch
Officer: You aren't American. You shouldn't be here.
Spanish Person: But officer, I'm American.
The officer thinks about it and says, If you are, then use the words green, pink, and yellow in a sentence.
The Spaniard thinks for a moment and says, The phone goes green green, I pink it up and say 'Yellow'.
...they said it meant a lot to them.
I called to the front desk and they said they had a doctor on staff. After he made me feel better, I told him I was amazed such a small place had a doctor. He nodded and said: "No one expects te spanish inn physician. "
The class had students from many parts of the world. One day the teacher was late and when she came to the class, it was pure chaos in there. Americans were constantly quarrelling, Australians were standing on their head, Italians were making pasta. But the Spanish kid was surprisingly quiet and was in his seat.
Nobody expects the Spanish in position
After she gets off the call, the man behind her taps her on the shoulder and says, "I didn't want to interrupt your call, but next time you need to speak in English"
"Excuse me?" the woman replied.
"This is America," the man said, "We speak English in America. If you wanna speak Spanish, you can go back to Mexico."
"Sir, I was speaking Navajo, which was a language of this country long before you came here," the woman replied, "If you want to speak English, you can go back to England"
A Spanish magician announced to his audience that "he would disappear on the count of three" then said "uno, dos" and then disappeared without a tres.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the spanish nada jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working spanish hispanic piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.