Spanish Jokes

164 spanish jokes and hilarious spanish puns to laugh out loud. Read ethnic jokes about spanish that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Check out this collection of hilarious Spanish jokes! Get ready to laugh at these classic yo mama, gay, Dominican, Gómez, hola and eso jokes. Whether you speak Spanish fluently or just know a few words, you'll find something to chuckle about with these jokes.

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Funniest Spanish Short Jokes

Short spanish jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The spanish humour may include short spanish teacher jokes also.

  1. People always ask where I got my incredibly detailed tattoo done, but they never believe me when I tell them Spain. Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.
  2. My neighbour's 4-year-old has been learning Spanish since lockdown. He still can't say "please" though, which I think is poor for four.
  3. Here, have a joke in spanish sabe inglés?"
    "como se dice 'un zapato' en inglés?"
    "a shoe"
  4. I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at football. Nobody expects the Spanish in position.
  5. My 4-year-old has been learning Spanish all year and still can't say the word please Which I think is poor for four.
  6. My company got bought out by a Madrid based firm today. Everyone seemed surprised. Nobody expects the Spanish Acquisition
  7. Over 99.99% of people that took the vaccine for the 1918 Spanish flu have passed away. This seems very suspicious to me!
  8. My uncle runs a clinic inside a hotel in Spain He come out late at night to ring people's doorbells.

    Because nobody suspects The Spanish Inn Physician
  9. Spanish Dad Joke Dad: Son what are you drinking?
    Son: Soy Milk
    Dad: Hola Milk, me llamo Dad
  10. LPT: If you are ever at a party or business meeting with Spanish speakers, make sure to stand up and say Mucho It means a lot to them

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Spanish One Liners

Which spanish one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with spanish? I can suggest the ones about spanish name and spanish language.

  1. I always say muchos to spanish people It means a lot to them
  2. Who wears a red suit and knows if you were naughty or nice? The Spanish Inquisition.
  3. If you talk to a Spanish speaker make sure to say "mucho" It means a lot to them.
  4. What do you call a group of confused Spanish speaking racists? The ¿Qué Qué Qué?
  5. I've getting feedback that my jokes are in broken English, so here's one in Spanish. uno.
  6. "Uno, dos..." And just like that, the Spanish magician was gone without a tres.
  7. My four-year-old nephew still can't say 'please' in Spanish. That's poor for four.
  8. My friend is so rich He thought manual labor was a Spanish musician
  9. I used to have a Spanish girlfriend called Nada She meant nothing to me
  10. My dad is moving to a Spanish city Ciudad
  11. My wife says I have a short attention spanish is a beautiful language isn't it?
  12. I like saying 'mucho' in front of my Spanish friends It means a lot to them.
  13. What do you call a Spanish midget? A paragraph.
    Because he's not a full essay.
  14. What do you call a Spanish man with a rubber toe? Roberto.
  15. Why do Spanish men get half price movie tickets? They take the señor discount.

Spanish Speaking Jokes

Here is a list of funny spanish speaking jokes and even better spanish speaking puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • When speaking with Spanish people, make sure to always mention "mucho" It means a lot to them
  • When I'm around my Spanish-speaking friends, I always use the word "mucho"... It means a lot to them.
  • Did you hear about the Spanish speaking magician? He counted from uno to dos and disappeared without a tres.
  • What did the guy with 6 children say to the guy with six felonies? I don't know; they were speaking Spanish.
  • What do you call a group of Spanish-speaking moms who band together to protect their neighborhood? Super Barrio Mothers
  • I always make sure to say "muchas" near my Spanish speaking friends. It means a lot to them.
  • I asked my friend, a spanish-speaking theoretical physicist, if there was an abbreviation for the speed of light. "Sí", he replied.
    (The joke works better out loud)
  • Did you hear about the Spanish speaking magician? He said for my next trick, I will disappear on the count of three. Uno, dos - but then he vanished without a tres.
  • Chuck Norris can speak Spanish in three different languages.
  • Do you speak Spanish? A) No. B) A little. C) Señor

Spanish English Jokes

Here is a list of funny spanish english jokes and even better spanish english puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • In a huge lecture hall once I only had four international students turn up - English, French, Spanish and German. I asked if they could all see me. They said... Yes, Oui, Si, Ja
  • What did the Spanish sauce say to the English sauce? Soy sauce.
  • Does Spanish have anything in common with English? No
  • What do English speakers yell when they're on a rollercoaster? Weeeeeeeeeeee!!!!
    What do Spanish speakers yell when they're on a roller coaster?
  • How do you convert Spanish programming into English? Yes++
  • I was surprised to see that the first chapter of the otherwise English novel was written entirely in Spanish But then again, no one expects the Spanish exposition.
  • The word Algo may not sound familiar to English speakers. But in Spanish it really means something.
  • I wonder if stereotypically romantic Spanish in pauses...because they to speak watching...the subtitles...of romantic movies.
  • How many mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? Juan.
    *SPOILER* - For those who dont get it, if u say "juan" in spanish, it sounds like "one" in english.
  • No means no. -page 47 of my Spanish to English dictionary
Spanish joke, No means no.

English Spanish Jokes

Here is a list of funny english spanish jokes and even better english spanish puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • English speakers yell "yes" or "yeah" when excited. Spanish speakers yell "sí".... ...French speakers sound like they're going down rollercoasters.
  • How do you say? How do you say ''Hablas Español'' in English?
    Do you speak Spanish?
    No, that's why I'm asking?
  • An English speaking man is dating a Spanish speaking women He makes sure to tell her "mucho" every day. It means a lot to her.
  • Why did the English majors switch to Spanish? (OC) Too many persuasive esses.
  • A Spanish man who doesn't speak English says to a Mexican woman, "Lady, I want to make the love with you," and she says, "Mande?" and he says, "No Monday, today."
  • I'm writing an English to Spanish self defense book. It's called " No means no."
  • Why did the waiter delay until after converting English menus to Spanish to announce they weren't the gender everyone thought? Because they were happy to serve as trans later.
  • The Spanish have an agenda! Whereas the English have a diary
  • I asked my Spanish teacher what "no se" meant in English.. ..he said he didn't know.

Spanish Name Jokes

Here is a list of funny spanish name jokes and even better spanish name puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I've started buying store brand Spanish rice instead of the expensive stuff As they say, "Arroz by any other name..."
  • My friend told me he can think of over 300 Spanish names... but I can only think of Juan.
  • I asked a Spanish teacher to translate this sentence "Me llamo comprar"
    She looked at me confused and said
    "Your name is to buy?"
    "It's pronounced Toby"
  • If a guy lives in a Spanish speaking country. And has last name is Rita. He would be Señor Rita.
  • My mother in law is Spanish My mother in law is Spanish, so when we named our son 'Muchos' it really meant a lot to her.
  • Bouncer with the best name ever I went to the club last night and met this half Spanish, half Russian bouncer with the most appropriate name ever: Julio Buggeroff.
  • A parrot named Nigel leaves home and returns home,4 years later, speaking Spanish It's pretty common, all the language majors I knew moved back in with their parents too.
  • What did the spanish fireman name his 2 sons? Jose and Hose B
  • I know a Spanish philosopher and he lives in my kitchen... His name is Plato.
  • I think my Spanish girlfriend is cheating on me She keeps talking about this "great" guy names Jesus
Spanish joke, I think my Spanish girlfriend is cheating on me

Rib-Tickling Spanish Jokes that Bring Friends Together

What funny jokes about spanish you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean spanish english jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make spanish pranks.

Two old men, one French and one Spanish were sitting on a park bench.

When a beautiful young girl in a miniskirt walks by. Just as she passes them a breeze comes along and lifts the girl's skirt up revealing she's not wearing p**.... The French man looks at the Spanish man and says "C'est la vie" and the Spanish man exclaims back "Se la vi, tambien."

changed my voice settings to Spanish on my gps

it told me i didn't have enough people in the car

I need a joke in to tell my Hispanic manager!

I tried telling my boss a corny joke but he said he didn't get it because it was too 'American'(his words not mine). So i told him I'd find a joke in Spanish and try telling him it. I want to make my boss laugh so help me out guys! So if you know any work friendly jokes in Spanish post them here with a translation. Thanks!

Hear are sum morre punny science jokes

How often do I tell chemistry jokes? Periodically.
Is Silicon the same in English as in Spanish? Si.
The last time I told a chemistry joke there was no reaction.
Chemistry puns Im in my element.
What do you do with a dead chemist?
Ion-estly cant think of anymore... All the good ones Argon!
Edit 1 just thought of this.
What does Barium Cobalt and Nitrogen make?

The Spanish national soccer team visited an orphanage in Brazil today

"It was hard to see their sad and hopeless faces", said one of the orphans

A Mexican Joke

A Mexican man finds a much needed job and asks the owner to hire him. The owner says he'll hire him ONLY if he can come up with a sentence using 3 words of his choice. The words are Green, Pink and Yellow. So the Mexican thinks for a second then replies (read in a Spanish accent) the phone goes Green Green, so I Pink it up and say Yellow?

A spanish magician ...

A spanish magician gets on stage and says "I will disappear in 3 seconds." He counts: "Uno, Dos." And he disappeared without a tres.

The Spanish magician

So there's this Spanish magician right and he says "I'll make myself disappear on the count of three".
"Unos..... Dos...." *BANG!" in a cloud of smoke he disappeared without a Tres.

Mom, why am I dark if my father's skin is alabaster and yours is too?

Rough translation from Spanish:
Child:Mom, why am I dark if my father's skin is alabaster and yours is too?
Mother: With how drunk I was that night it's a miracle you don't bark!

A cop pulled over a spanish photon...

The cop asked, "Do you know how fast you were going?"
The photon said, "c."

I went to see a Spanish magician

I went to see a Spanish magician and he told the crowd that he could make himself disappear on the count of three.
He started counting.
"Uno! Dos!"
And then he was gone. Without a tres.

I recently bought a copy of Monty Python's Big Red Book, but was later dismayed to find that I'd purchased the Spanish language version...

Nobody expects the Spanish text edition.

What is it called when a spanish man has 10 t**...?

Diez nuts!

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino?

The Spanish Inquisition.

A blonde tells her friend

"I completed a jigsaw puzzle in record time!"
"No way! How long did it take you?" Replied her friend
"6 months"
"That cannot be a record time!'
" Well the box said from 1 to 3 years"
Sorry for bad English, original was in Spanish

A Spanish magician is at a party

He begins his trick for the birthday girl, grabbing a handful of magic sprinkle dust. He then begins to count, "uno, dos," p**....

He disappeared without a tres.

What if soy milk... just regular milk introducing itself in Spanish?

Interviewer: Name one of your accomplishments

Applicant:Well I discovered aliens, outside my house and managed to learn their language.
Interviewer:That seems rather complicated...
Applicant:Well Spanish isn't hard to learn sir.

My Spanish teacher taught me the word for "Transgender"

I asked him if the word is masculine or feminine

A man is in an airplane from Miami to Paris

And a stunning gorgeous woman seats by his side. He's the eager to start a conversation.
"So, what are you doing in Paris?"
"I'm a scientist, I research s**..."
The man is now tempted:
"What have you discovered about s**... in your research?"
"I came to find that Native Americans have the longest p**... and Spanish can last the longest in bed. By the way, I'm Carol, what's your name?"
"I'm Sitting Bull Hernandez, nice to meet you"

I always thought soy milk...

was just introducing itself in Spanish

Jesus walks into a bar

The barman looks up and asks "We don't serve wine here"
Jesus looks at him quizzically and goes to look for a Spanish translator because he had just immigrated from Mexico and English was not his first language.

My dog only responds to commands in Spanish

He's Espanyol

A priest, a rabbi and penguin walk into a bar


What is the longest word in the Spanish language?


The most well known person in the world

Some Spanish guy named "Manual"... A copy of his autobiography, printed in multiple languages, comes free with every electronic device or machinery... although much of his life story is lost in translation.

What do you call a spanish child m**...?

A Pedrophile.

A Spanish magician tells the audience he is going to disappear on the count of 3

He says uno, dos... then p**..., he disappears without a tres

I saw a Spanish magician last night.. he said "uno, dos.."

And then he disappeared without a tres

Asked my Spanish friend if he liked any letters in the alphabet.

"C," he said. "E, too."

I'd like to thank my Spanish teacher for spending so much time teaching me what mucho means

It really means a lot

My Spanish-speaking students got a kick out of this one.

Q: What do you call a person who speaks 3 languages?
A: (Try to elicit responses..) Tri-Lingual.
Q: What do you call a person who speaks two languages?
A: (Many of them know this one) Bi-Lingual.
Q: What do you call a person who speaks one language?
A: An American!

When people ask me where I got my well drawn tattoo, their always suprised when I say i got it in Spain.

Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.

Two students and a teacher want to have s**... with foreign exchange students.

One student goes for the French student, and the whole time she screams, "Oui! Oui! Oui!"
The other student gets with a Spanish student, and she screams, "Sí! Sí! Sí!"
The teacher locks a German student in his office, the whole time she screams, "Nein! Nein! Nein!" He replies, "Really? I could have sworn you were only eight years old."

Many people who go to Spain to get tattoos are surprised at how skilled the tattoo artists are.

Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.


People are amazed at how good the tattoo artists are in Spain........
They weren't expecting the Spanish ink precision

People are always amazed at the skilled tattoo artists in Spain.

No one expects the Spanish ink precision

A Spanish magician told the crowd he'll make himself vanish on the count of 3. He goes "Uno, dos...

And *p**...*..... He disappeared without a tres.

A Spanish magician was showing a trick..

"For my next trick, I'll disappear into thin air. Uno, dos."
And he vanished without a tres!

What do you call a 60 year old Spanish man?

A señor citizen

Whenever I'm asked "What happened in 1492?", people are always surprised by my answer.

Nobody expects "The Spanish Inquisition".

(True story, for what it's worth) My neighbour has a new Spanish teacher at school, his name is Mr Armada.

Like the Spanish Armada? I asked.
Yeah, he said and I shook my head in disbelief.
Well, I sighed. At least he isn't called Mr Inquisition. Nobody would have expected that.

I was surprised when my boss told me that our company was bought by a millionaire from Barcelona.

Nobody expects the Spanish acquisition

We should say mucho to all spanish speakers in this sub

it means a lot to them for sure.

My 4-year-old nephew has been learning Spanish since lockdown.

He can't say 'please' which I think is poor for four

I always say mucho to my Spanish friends

It means alot to them

In New York there are many tattoo artists from all over the world, but for some reason the artists from Spain have trouble getting business.

Why? Because nobody expects the Spanish ink precision!

During lockdown my next door neighbours 4 year old started learning Spanish.

He still can't say 'Please' though, which is poor for four.

I wasted my life

I fear I've wasted my life. I spent years and years learning Latin, Spanish, Mandarin, and Swahili but it turns out I just misheard my uncle when I though he told me "girls love a cunning linguist".

A girl was studying French, and doing very well at it.

One day, she asked her teacher Do you know anything about Spanish? For I know everything there is to know about French, and I need a new language.
The teacher responded What a sudden change! And why would you possibly ask me, your French teacher? This was completely unexpected!
Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

My daughter has been learning Spanish for a year now but still can't say please

Which I think is poor for four

What do Spanish people call leftover beef?


I asked my Spanish colleague if he could include me on an email

He replied, CC

Smallpox, the Spanish Flu, and the black death have already done the whole global pandemic thing...

What covid is doing is just plaguerism.

We did our company Christmas party online this year and my coworkers were surprised at my incredibly detailed tattoo. They refused to believe me when I told them it was done in Madrid, before the pandemic...

Nobody expected the Spanish ink precision...

I showed my Mexican friends I know a little Spanish by saying "mucho" and they seemed really flattered

...they said it meant a lot to them.

I got sick in a small hotel in Madrid.

I called to the front desk and they said they had a doctor on staff. After he made me feel better, I told him I was amazed such a small place had a doctor. He nodded and said: "No one expects te spanish inn physician. "

Spanish Magician

A Spanish magician announced to his audience that "he would disappear on the count of three" then said "uno, dos" and then disappeared without a tres.

My Spanish teacher's husband died last week

I approached her in class and said "Mucho"
"Thanks," she said, "that means a lot."
"Oh my," she replied. "Thank you, that means so much."
"El mundo."
"Thank you so much," she said, "what you've said means the world."

Spanish joke, My Spanish teacher's husband died last week

jokes about spanish