Sound Jokes
141 sound jokes and hilarious sound puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about sound that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article highlights the funny side of sounds with a list of the funniest animal, DJ, speed of sound, and fart sound jokes. Find out the meaning behind "tak" and why a chicken's sound is so funny. Enjoy the Sonic and Ding jokes too!
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Funniest Sound Short Jokes
Short sound jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sound humour may include short song jokes also.
- What asian stereo type do you hear the most? Personally I've got a Sony surround sound system.
- My laptop was making funny noises today, it sounded like it was singing... Probably because it's a Dell
- Queue sounds like q followed by 4 silent letters, but… They're just waiting their turn.
- It's a good thing Gatorade was developed at the University of Florida as opposed to Florida State Seminole Fluid doesn't sound quite as good.
- TIL "sugar" is the only word in the English language where "su-" makes a "sh" sound. At least, I'm pretty sure...
FP - If light travels faster than the speed of sound... how come I can hear the guy in the bmw behind me honk before the light turns green?
- If a tree falls..... A tree falls in the forest but doesn't make a sound.
Hunter in camouflage gear: "WHAT THE HECK???!"
Tree: "I mean, AAAAAARGH, I fell!" - I found a vinyl record called "Sounds of the Wasps." When I played it, I said to myself, "This doesn't sound like wasps." I was right. I was playing the B-side.
- How do you milk a sheep? Sell headphone for $549.
- I started calling my toilet the "Jim"... instead of the John.
It sounds much better when I say that I go to the Jim first thing every morning.
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Sound One Liners
Which sound one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sound? I can suggest the ones about audio and sing.
- {air horn sound} {second air horn sound}
Me: this isn't deodorant - I have a russian friend who's a sound technician And a Czech one too.
A Czech one too. - If pronouncing my b's as v's makes me sound Russian, Then soviet.
- My girlfriend accused me of cheating I told her she was starting to sound like my wife.
- What sound does a Turkey make? "coup coup"
- The US has placed 18th for math… It sounds bad, I'm just glad we hit top ten.
- When do S and C sound the same? When it's necessary.
- What sound does a 747 make when it bounces? boeing boeing boeing
- What does a German snake sound like? ßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßß....
- Light travels faster than sound! That's why some people appear bright until they talk.
- There's this new cryptocurrency called Decibel. 🚀🔊🌕 It's a sound investment.
- What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot
- What is an onomatopoeia? Exactly what it sounds like.
- I hate the word "xenophobia" it just sounds so...foreign
- What is a microwave's beep sound file called? Micro.wav
Sound Of Music Jokes
Here is a list of funny sound of music jokes and even better sound of music puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I was listening to some music with my friend and he told me "you should turn the bass down on your speaker". It was sound advice.
- The thing about good music is.. ...its technically sound.
- No matter what you think of the celebrities commenting on how we handle the current crisis, you should ALWAYS listen to music producers. They give sound advice.
- How was the sound quality of Shrek's musical keyboard? Nothing special, it was just MIDI-Ogre
- If a tree falls in the woods It won't make a sound because it has been copyright claimed by Warner Music Group.
- Was at a party where the DJ was playing the music too quietly so I asked him to turn it up. Thought it was nice to offer some sound advice.
- What makes a barbershop quartet sound so amazing? They're on the cutting edge of musical innovation.
- Why are the guys at the music shop so trustworthy? They always give you sound advice.
- Where do musical notes go surfing? On sound waves.
- I just bought a new InSinkErator that plays music when you turn it on. It might sound crazy..... but it ain't no lie...baby, bye bye bye
Fart Sound Jokes
Here is a list of funny fart sound jokes and even better fart sound puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I recently learned that humans farts have sounded the same since ancient Egypt. We share a toot in common.
- Where are the best sounding farts listed? Sharts.
- What sounds flat, but smells sharp? Farts. Now, all you musicians who got this joke; go practice.
Cat Sound Jokes
Here is a list of funny cat sound jokes and even better cat sound puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What did the guitarist say to the accordion player? Your instrument sounds like a dying cat, but at least it’s not a banjo.
- How do cats like their steak joke? Rare
P.S.
Rare sounds like a cat meowing. Get it? - What does a non-moving cat and a motorcycle traveling at 80mph have in common? They make the same sound.
- What do we want? Cat sounds!
When do we want them?
*purrrrrr purrrrr* - funny cat with sound
Sound Check Jokes
Here is a list of funny sound check jokes and even better sound check puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I moan every time a cashier checks an item for me The sound is proportional to the amount. I once bought a house. They heard me three states away
Animal Sound Jokes
Here is a list of funny animal sound jokes and even better animal sound puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What does an anime firetruck sound like? owo owo owo owo owo owo owo
- What do the beach boys and animal shelters have in common? Pet sounds
- I love waking up to the sound of birds arguing with their spouses.
- I really like animal puns. I know it sounds weird, but just bear with me.
- Apparently animals make different sounds according to different languages. For example, in Korea a dog makes a sizzling noise
- I think Noah might be the craziest of Biblical figures; hearing God, building an ark, gathering animals The whole thing sounds delugional.
- China banning animal farm sounds ironic
- Which animal dies every time it makes a sound? A Frog.
It Croaks. - Turtle to turtle: "Don't ya just love the sound of rain on your roof?"
- What's a moo hoo for the sound you hear when a cow spits?
A cud thud.
Hilarious Sound Jokes for a Fun-Filled Night with Friends
What funny jokes about sound you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean sense jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make sound pranks.
Can you write a whole paragraph without the letter A?
I wouldn't recommend it.
Honestly, your sentences willl just sound wrong.
Everyone will notice you're doing something
different. Your writing won't flow smoothly. You'll
use weird words.
It's not worth the effort involved in spending
time online looking up tons of synonyms which
don't feel right, just to produce weird, stilted
prose.
You'd be better off giving up, to be honest.
I woke up hung-over to the sound of my neighbour mowing his lawn.
He'll have to mow around me. I'm not moving.
What does a church shooting sound like?
Pew! Pew!
My parents told me not to listen to my iPod too loud...
It was sound advice.
Technology has ruined our kids
A group of young children were siting in a circle with their teacher. She was going around in turn asking them all questions.
"Davy, what noise does a cow make? "
"It goes moo. "
"Alice, what noise does a cat make? "
"It goes meow. "
"Jamie, what sound does a lamb make? "
"It goes baaa. "
"Jennifer, what sound does a mouse make? "
"Errr.., it goes.. click! "
If a hipster falls on the forest, does it make a sound?
Yes...but you've probably never heard it before.
Harry is taking a stroll through the woods....
...when he finds a large hole in the ground. The hole seems ridiculously deep, so Harry takes a small rock and throws it down the hole. Then he listens for the sound of the rock hitting the ground below. He doesn't hear anything, so next he tries a larger rock. Still, no sound. He looks around for something larger, and he finds an old railroad tie. He lifts up the railroad tie and chucks it down the hole. Still no sound.
Then out of NOWHERE, Harry sees a goat charging at him full speed from behind. Harry dives out of the way, then watches as the goat charges strait down the hole.
Harry is sitting there, perplexed, when a farmer approaches Harry and asks
Farmer: "Hey son, you haven't seen a goat around here have you?"
Harry: "Actually, Yes I did! It was the strangest thing, a goat just charged me full speed! I was just able to get out of the way. THEN the goat ran strait down that hole over there" as Harry points to the hole.
Farmer: "That's impossible, I tied that goat to a railroad tie"
I bought some new speakers today......
I think I made a sound investment.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A teacher in a Chicago kindergarten class asked...
her class what kind of sound a pig makes.
Little Tyrone stood up and yelled: "FREEZE, MUTHAFUCKA!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The day after Beethoven's f**...
The day after Beethoven's f**..., at midnight, a drunken man, having just left the bar, went into the graveyard, where he heard a strange sound. Looking for the source of the mysterious sound, he discovered it was coming from Beethoven's grave. Alarmed, he called his friends, and found they could hear the sound too (even the sober ones).
Soon, a crowd was forming at the graveyard. The mayor, who was very familiar with classical music, recognized the sound as Beethoven's 9th Symphony played backwards. When it ended, Beethoven's 8th Symphony started playing, also backwards, and then the 7th, and then the 6th, and so forth. At dawn, having reached a conclusion, the mayor said to the gathering crowd:
"There's nothing to fear, gentlemen. He's just decomposing."
So aliens from Mars comes down to Earth...
...And they're friendly! The leaders of the world and the aliens plan a huge televised event where the leaders can ask questions on whatever they want.
During this event, the pope is up to talk to the aliens.
"I know this question may sound odd to you gentlemen," the pope starts to ask, "but I was wondering if you and your kind knew about Jesus Christ?"
"Jesus Christ?!?" the alien leader exclaims, "how do we not! He swings by our planet every two years or so. Awesome guy!"
Now this obviously starts a huge debate within the UN, as this information now has implications to everything they knew. The pope, however, is not exactly a happy person as his brain is on other information.
"EVERY TWO YEARS OR SO?!?" The pope exclaims, "We've still been waiting for his SECOND coming!"
Trying to calm down the pope, the aliens say "Well maybe he didn't like your chocolate."
The pope, upon hearing this news, takes a few moments to calm down. When he finally regains his composure, he states calmly, "Forgive me, but what does chocolate have anything to do with this?"
The aliens respond, "Well when he was on our planet, we would give him huge boxes of chocolates. Why, what did you guys do when he was here?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What sound does a fratboy make when he hits the water?
d**...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Do you know what evil kisses sound like?
Muah hahaha
What does it sound like when a pterodactyl uses the bathroom?
Nothing, the pee is silent
I wish life was more like hockey...
Who doesn't want a horn to sound when their period ends?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Little Billy started playing o**... when he was 5
Little Billy started playing o**... when he was 5. He practiced and practiced every day. He had heard of this orchestra from his town that was really hard to get accepted into. This made him want to practice and practice even more. He even got private lessons with a skilled organist. Finally, the day came. He went to the audition room and started to play, but no sound would come out. The o**... was broken. The judge immediately arranged for another o**.... As Billy began to play, the o**... also creaked and then ceased to make a sound. The judge arranged for yet another o**... for Billy, but that one broke down as well. The judge suddenly collapsed to the ground.
At the hospital, the doctors pronounced the judge dead and performed an autopsy.
"The cause of death appears to be multiple o**... failure."
This will blow your mind!
If you take the pin out of a grenade and put your ear to the hole you can hear the faint sound of the world wide I.Q average increasing.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A woman is woken up late one night to the sound of her husband coming home.
He crashes into the bedroom reeking of booze, with a duck under his arm.
"What the h**...'s going on, Steve?" asks the woman.
"What do you think of the pig?"
"That's not a pig, it's a duck."
"I wasn't talking to you."
My mum tripped and dropped the basket of clothes she'd just ironed.
It may sound far-fetched but it's true. I watched it all unfold.
So I woke up this morning to my dishwasher making a weird sound..
Turns out she was just vacuuming.
Sometimes, to impress girls, I use big words that I don't fully understand...
...in an effort to sound more photosynthesis.
A man is walking through a forest and sees a huge hole
The whole is really deep. It's huge and dark and seems bottomless, so the man decides to see how deep.
He throws in a pebble and listens, but it doesn't make a sound.
He throws in a big stick; still no sound
He throws in a huge tree stump he prised up out of the ground; nothing
Suddenly, a dog comes running by and jumps straight into the hole at alarming speed.
The man stares into the hole, dumbfounded, when another man walks by and asks "have you seen my dog?"
"Yeah" he replies, "he just jumped in this hole"
"That's funny" the other man replies, "I had him tied to a tree stump"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
It's a good thing Harambe got shot....
d**... out for dead kids just doesn't sound good
I named my dog Shark to make him sound tough...
For some reason, people go into a panic when he runs off on the beach.
I'm so proud of my son
I asked him what the sound of one hand clapping is. He said "dunno" and walked off to his room, but I can hear him trying to figure it out.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I got a call from my brother the other day...
I found out he was diagnosed with an intense fear of wanting to have s**... with other men; Homonymphobia. Which really freaked me out because I have a fear of words that sound the same but mean different things.
What sounds do nuts make when they sneeze?
Cashew
What does a Boston terrier sound like?
Bahk bahk. Wicked bahk.
A tree falls on a woman. Does it make a sound?
Idk. The better question is why is there a tree in the kitchen?
My girlfriend "Dad joked" me on a hike.
I asked my girlfriend what she thought trees would sound like if they talked while on a hike.
She said "I bet we couldn't understand them"
I said "why do you think that?"
She said "because they probably only bark"
She then laughed the next half mile down the trail barking occasionally and saying "shh, shh, do you hear that? Thats a tree talking in the distance"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My mate asked me why I have s**... noises saved on my phone.
I said, It's for sound effects during s**....
He asked, Your wife a bit quiet in the sack?
I replied, No, I work in a morgue.
The dentist said, "You need two root canals. They'll be expensive, but I'll let you pay...
..for them for $500 a month for 36 months."
I said, "Wow, those sound like car payments."
"They are."
My doctor said he could give me some aids for my erectile dysfunction.
I told him that didn't sound like a good trade.
A baby's laughter can be the most beautiful sound you will ever hear...
Unless it's 3am
And you're home alone
And you don't have a baby...
My wife always gives me sound advice
99% sound, 1% advice
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What sounds like a mouse, but much, much louder?
#**A MOUSE**
Which STD is transmitted through sound?
Hearing aids
Three boys are hanging around a farm trying to get a glimpse of the farmer's daughter showering.
The farmer notices them and he grabs his shotgun. They run and hide in the barn, each in one sack. The farmer arrives at the barn, and notices the 3 sacks.
He kicks one. From the sack, a sound comes out: Meow!
"Must be a cat." He moves on.
Kicks the second sack: Woof! Woof!!
"Must be a dog." He moves on.
He kicks the third sack: The sack says: "Potatoes!"
A policeman said he wanted to search my car.
"You won't find any drugs," I told him.
He said, "You don't sound sure about that."
I said, "Trust me, I looked earlier."
What sound does a chocolate gun make?
Cacao!
My girlfriend keeps insisting that I'm cheating on her.
She's starting to sound like my wife.
What sound does a rubber airplane make?
Boeing
I was once taught that nothing rhymes with silver...
But to this day, I still don't think they sound the same.
My friend was showing me his new golf ball.
He tells me, "This ball is amazing, you can't lose it. If it goes in the rough, it makes a beeping sound. It glows in the dark so you can find it when its getting dark. If it goes in the water, it will float and make its way back to the shore."
I said to him, "That's incredible, where did you get it?"
"Found it"
I ran my car into a pole late last night
The worst part was the awful sound it made, but I don't speak polish so I just kept driving
My band used to have a Polish sound guy.
And we also had a Czech one, too.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Woman goes to a doctor with a t**... lodged inside her...
Doctor: So how did this happen?
Woman: I don't know, I mean I didn't get them from the store as usual, I saw a special deal on eBay, a hundred boxes for $1!
Doctor: A hundred boxes for $1? Didn't that sound suspiciously cheap to you?
Woman: Well I thought that too, so I checked the entire listing and it said plain and clear
One hundred boxes of tampons for $1...
...no strings attached!
A zookeeper wishes to buy some new animals from another wildlife park.
She writes:
Dear sir, We are a recently opened zoo and are looking to purchase 2 mooses. "No that doesn't sound right." She thinks.
We are looking to purchase 2 meese. "No that can't be right either."
Dear sir, I wish to inquire about purchasing a moose. Kind Regards.
P.S. Please send another moose along with the first.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Day 284 without s**......
Went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound
A man comes home drunk...
As he stumbles in trying to be quiet as possible not to wake up the wife...he's too drunk and knocks over a stool startling wife from sleep...
Wife, from bedroom: Bob, is that you? what was that ?
Bob: Oh nothing honey, just a stool. Be right there...
As he stumbles into the bedroom he falls over creating a loud CRASHHH
Wife: Bob? Are you OK? What was that sound???
Bob: Oh its nothing honey, i was just hanging my shirt and it fell.
Wife: How did your shirt make such a loud sound?
Bob: I was still wearing it
If me having a Russian accent means my B's sound like V's...
Soviet
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A woman's closet door what making a terrible sounds whenever a bus was crossing the street outside
So she called a carpenter to check it out.
The carpenter comes to see what's the problem but sees nothing. Right then a bus was crossing the street and a loud creaking sound was heard. He couldn't believe it.
So he told her that he'll be waiting inside the closet to see what is making this noise.
After a few minutes the husband comes home, opens the closet and see a man inside.
He looks at his wife with disgust and back at the man and asks: "what the h**... are you doing in my closet…?"
The carpenter then said "would you believe me if I told you I am waiting for the bus? "
My hot flight attendant asked how I like my coffee
Trying to sound cool, I told her I like my coffee like I like my women. And that's when she told me "That's cute honey, but the coffee's free. You don't have to pay for it here!"
A zookeeper lost a pair of mongoose to a storm and needed to replace them. He began writing an email to his supplier...
Dear sir, please send me two mongooses at once.
That didn't sound right, so he tried again.
Dear sir, please send me two mongeese at once.
That still didn't sound right, so he gave it one last attempt:
Dear sir, please send me one mongoose. And while you're at it- send me another mongoose.
(In memory of my dad who told that joke at every family gathering for 30 years.)
Recently a new supermarket opened nearby
It has an automatic water mist generator to keep the produce fresh.
Just before it starts the mist, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.
When you pass the milk section, you hear cows mooing and you get the scent of freshly cut hay.
In the meat department there is the aroma of charcoal grilled steaks with onions.
When you approach the egg counter, you hear hens cluck and cackle, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of eggs frying.
The bread department features the tantalizing smell of fresh baked bread and cookies.
I don't buy toilet paper there any more…
A few weeks ago I ordered a box to store my money and a set of speakers online.
They arrived today, safe and sound.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
For my first cake day I want to share a joke my dad told me when I was probably too young to really understand it. How does an elephant hide in the jungle?
Climbs to the top of a cherry tree and paints his b**... red.
What's the loudest sound in the jungle?
Giraffes eating cherries!
(Apologies if you've heard it before fellow Redditors! Maybe by next cake day I'll get better material)
Two cowboys were riding through a canyon and from far off they heard the sound of drumming.
One of them said, "I don't like the sound of those drums." And a distant voice called out "He's not our regular drummer!"
The last thing my grandfather told me was It's worth spending money on good speakers.
That was some sound advice.
The difference between a man and a woman's friends.
A wife did not come home one night and the next day the husband was furious. She swore she spent the night at a girlfriend's house.
The husband called 10 of his wife's closest friends and none of them knew what he was talking about.
To get her back he did not come home the next night. The next day his wife met him at the door furious at him. He swore he spent the night at his buddy's house.
She called 10 of his closest friends. 8 of them confirmed that he spent the night at their house, two of them swore that he was still there sound asleep.
Sylvester Stallone, Chuck Norris and Arnold Schwarzenegger are sitting in a restaurant, and Sylvester Stallone is like: "Guys, we should make a movie with the three of us, but I'm all out of ideas at the moment, I'm kind of bored with the standard action flicks."
Chuck says: "Don't you have any ideas?"
"Yeah, this may sound silly, but I was actually thinking about doing a movie on great classical composers"
That's when Arnold trows himself in the conversation and says: "That sounds like a great idea! Sylvester, you can be Mozart, and Chuck can be Beethoven!"
"And who will you be, Arnold?"
"I'll be Bach."
My mom pointed at a guy across from our house...
...and said, "Stay away from him, he takes drugs."
That's sound advice, I thought to myself. I don't want him taking mine.
Dont see why people say that babysitting a toddler is hard. You just grease the bathtub, put them inside with some food and drink, and go do your business. I guarantee you that they will still be there when you return.
If you stay in the house, you might need to use sound cancelling headphones too though.
There really should be a subgenre of hip-hop called Bubble Rap
It would probably sound a lot like pop.
I'm using vibration and oscillation in specific frequencies to impart information
It might seem far-fetched, but the idea is sound.
Scientists record the sound of two helium atoms laughing.
HeHe
I told my girlfriend I think she's cheating on me.
She told me I sound just like her husband.
