The Best 72 Sound Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Sound jokes. There are some sound cacao jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these sound sound of music puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Sound Jokes and Puns

What Asian stereo type do you hear the most?

Personally I've got a Sony surround sound system.

{air horn sound}

{second air horn sound}

Me: this isn't deodorant

I have a Russian friend who's a sound technician

And a Czech one too.
A Czech one too.

I wish life was more like hockey...

Who doesn't want a horn to sound when their period ends?

jokes about sound

This will blow your mind!

If you take the pin out of a grenade and put your ear to the hole you can hear the faint sound of the world wide I.Q average increasing.


What does a German snake sound like?

ßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßß....

My mum tripped and dropped the basket of clothes she'd just ironed.

It may sound far-fetched but it's true. I watched it all unfold.

Sound joke, My mum tripped and dropped the basket of clothes she'd just ironed.

What sound does a Turkey make?

"coup coup"

So I woke up this morning to my dishwasher making a weird sound..

Turns out she was just vacuuming.

Sometimes, to impress girls, I use big words that I don't fully understand...

...in an effort to sound more photosynthesis.

It's a good thing Harambe got shot....

Dicks out for dead kids just doesn't sound good

You can explore sound ding reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean sound boeing dad jokes. There are also sound puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


My girlfriend accused me of cheating

I told her she was starting to sound like my wife.

If pronouncing my b's as v's makes me sound Russian,

Then soviet.

I'm so proud of my son

I asked him what the sound of one hand clapping is. He said "dunno" and walked off to his room, but I can hear him trying to figure it out.

A man notices a TV for sale.

"Hey, how much is this TV?"

The salesman replies "1 dollar."

"Only a dollar? Why so cheap?"

The salesman tells him "the sound is stuck on the highest volume."

"So it's always on the highest volume? And it's only one dollar?"

"Yup."

"Wow, can't turn that down."

What sound does a bouncing plane make?

Boeing boeing boeing

Sound joke, What sound does a bouncing plane make?

TIL "sugar" is the only word in the English language where "su-" makes a "sh" sound.

At least, I'm pretty sure...

FP

What sound does a 747 make when it bounces?

boeing boeing boeing

If light travels faster than sound.

Then why do I always hear a honk before the light turn green?


A tree falls on a woman. Does it make a sound?

Idk. The better question is why is there a tree in the kitchen?

If light travels faster than the speed of sound...

how come I can hear the guy in the BMW behind me honk before the light turns green?

My girlfriend "Dad joked" me on a hike.

I asked my girlfriend what she thought trees would sound like if they talked while on a hike.
She said "I bet we couldn't understand them"
I said "why do you think that?"
She said "because they probably only bark"
She then laughed the next half mile down the trail barking occasionally and saying "shh, shh, do you hear that? Thats a tree talking in the distance"

There's this new cryptocurrency called Decibel. You just yell in your microphone to get money...

It's a sound investment.

My mate asked me why I have sex noises saved on my phone.

I said, It's for sound effects during sex.

He asked, Your wife a bit quiet in the sack?

I replied, No, I work in a morgue.

Light travels faster than sound!

That's why some people appear bright until they talk.

What sound does an airplane make when it bounces off the ground?

Boeing.

Sound joke, What sound does an airplane make when it bounces off the ground?

What sounds like a mouse, but much, much louder?

#**A MOUSE**

Three boys are hanging around a farm trying to get a glimpse of the farmer's daughter showering.

The farmer notices them and he grabs his shotgun. They run and hide in the barn, each in one sack. The farmer arrives at the barn, and notices the 3 sacks.

He kicks one. From the sack, a sound comes out: Meow!

"Must be a cat." He moves on.

Kicks the second sack: Woof! Woof!!

"Must be a dog." He moves on.

He kicks the third sack: The sack says: "Potatoes!"

A policeman said he wanted to search my car.

"You won't find any drugs," I told him.

He said, "You don't sound sure about that."

I said, "Trust me, I looked earlier."


My girlfriend keeps insisting that I'm cheating on her.

She's starting to sound like my wife.

I was once taught that nothing rhymes with silver...

But to this day, I still don't think they sound the same.

Did you know that light travels faster than sound?

That's why some people look bright until they start talking.

I ran my car into a pole late last night

The worst part was the awful sound it made, but I don't speak polish so I just kept driving

When do S and C sound the same?

When it's necessary.


Woman goes to a doctor with a tampon lodged inside her...

Doctor: So how did this happen?

Woman: I don't know, I mean I didn't get them from the store as usual, I saw a special deal on eBay, a hundred boxes for $1!

Doctor: A hundred boxes for $1? Didn't that sound suspiciously cheap to you?

Woman: Well I thought that too, so I checked the entire listing and it said plain and clear

One hundred boxes of tampons for $1...

...no strings attached!

Day 284 without sex...

Went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound

If me having a Russian accent means my B's sound like V's...

Soviet

A woman's closet door what making a terrible sounds whenever a bus was crossing the street outside

So she called a carpenter to check it out.

The carpenter comes to see what's the problem but sees nothing. Right then a bus was crossing the street and a loud creaking sound was heard. He couldn't believe it.

So he told her that he'll be waiting inside the closet to see what is making this noise.

After a few minutes the husband comes home, opens the closet and see a man inside.
He looks at his wife with disgust and back at the man and asks: "what the hell are you doing in my closet…?"

The carpenter then said "would you believe me if I told you I am waiting for the bus? "

So, I trained a chicken to talk

WIFE: Well, let's see

ME: What's a male deer?

CHICKEN: Buck

ME: How much is 200 pennies?

CHICKEN: Buck Buck

WIFE: This is stupid. Chickens just make that sound

ME: Oh believe me it gets better

CHICKEN: Yeah, just be patient Susan

My hot flight attendant asked how I like my coffee

Trying to sound cool, I told her I like my coffee like I like my women. And that's when she told me "That's cute honey, but the coffee's free. You don't have to pay for it here!"

A zookeeper lost a pair of mongoose to a storm and needed to replace them. He began writing an email to his supplier...

Dear sir, please send me two mongooses at once.

That didn't sound right, so he tried again.

Dear sir, please send me two mongeese at once.

That still didn't sound right, so he gave it one last attempt:

Dear sir, please send me one mongoose. And while you're at it- send me another mongoose.

(In memory of my dad who told that joke at every family gathering for 30 years.)

I have a Russian friend who's a sound technician ...

I have a Czech one, too.

What is a microwave's beep sound file called?

Micro.wav

It's a good thing Gatorade was developed at the University of Florida as opposed to Florida State

Seminole Fluid doesn't sound quite as good.

If you say AT&T backwards

You sound like a Canadian Bomb Technician.

A few weeks ago I ordered a box to store my money and a set of speakers online.

They arrived today, safe and sound.

For my first cake day I want to share a joke my dad told me when I was probably too young to really understand it. How does an elephant hide in the jungle?

Climbs to the top of a cherry tree and paints his balls red.

What's the loudest sound in the jungle?

Giraffes eating cherries!

(Apologies if you've heard it before fellow Redditors! Maybe by next cake day I'll get better material)

The last thing my grandfather told me was It's worth spending money on good speakers.

That was some sound advice.

If a tree falls.....

A tree falls in the forest but doesn't make a sound.

Hunter in camouflage gear: "WHAT THE HECK???!"

Tree: "I mean, AAAAAARGH, I fell!"

The other day I visited the thrift shop and picked up an old record album called 'Sound of Wasps'.

When I got home and played it I realised it didn't sound anything like wasps!

Turns out I'd been playing the Bee side.

Sylvester Stallone, Chuck Norris and Arnold Schwarzenegger are sitting in a restaurant, and Sylvester Stallone is like: "Guys, we should make a movie with the three of us, but I'm all out of ideas at the moment, I'm kind of bored with the standard action flicks."

Chuck says: "Don't you have any ideas?"

"Yeah, this may sound silly, but I was actually thinking about doing a movie on great classical composers"

That's when Arnold trows himself in the conversation and says: "That sounds like a great idea! Sylvester, you can be Mozart, and Chuck can be Beethoven!"

"And who will you be, Arnold?"

"I'll be Bach."

My mom pointed at a guy across from our house...

...and said, "Stay away from him, he takes drugs."

That's sound advice, I thought to myself. I don't want him taking mine.

I have a Polish friend who is a sound engineer ...

... and a Czech one too.

I'm using vibration and oscillation in specific frequencies to impart information

It might seem far-fetched, but the idea is sound.

A German couple has a baby...

For 4 years he makes no sound, does not speak. Then one day the mother gives him soup, he says This soup is cold. The parents are amazed and ask If you can talk, why have you not spoken before? The child replies Up to now everything has been satisfactory!

I told my girlfriend I think she's cheating on me.

She told me I sound just like her husband.

What sound does a cow make when it runs out of milk?

None. There is udder silence.

A guy named Bob dies and goes to hell

Before him stands the Devil.

"Hello, Bob. Welcome to Hell" the Devil says. "Now there are seven levels of hell and since your only sin was cheating on a science test in third grade, you'll be moved to level 1"

"Okay, that doesn't sound so bad" Says Bob

"Level 1 is the hottest level because heat rises. You would know that if you studied for your science test, Bob"

Today I brought home a record I found at Goodwill. It was called "Sounds Wasps Make"...

I put it on my record player and thought, "This doesn't sound anything like wasps!" Then I realized I was playing the bee side.

There's this new cryptocurrency called Decibel. 🚀🔊🌕

It's a sound investment.

Fun fact: "sugar" is the only word in the English language where "su-" makes a "sh" sound. . .

At least, I'm pretty sure that's correct.

I found a vinyl record called "Sounds of the Wasps." When I played it, I said to myself, "This doesn't sound like wasps."

I was right. I was playing the B-side.

did you know light travels faster than sound?

That's why people look bright until they talk

Why don't you see elephants hiding in trees?

Why don't you see elephants hiding in trees? Because they are really good at it.

Why do elephants paint their balls red?
So they can hide in cherry trees.

What's the loudest sound in the jungle?
Giraffes eating cherries

It's only natural

My wife was in labour when the nurse said it was time to push.
She gave it everything she had, until a fart, that from sound and stench, had obviously followed through. She was mortified.
"Don't worry," i said, patting her head. "I've heard this kind of thing is perfectly natural during birth. Isn't that right nurse?"
"Yes," said the nurse gagging, "But it's usually the mother not the father!.."

Which sound system technology do the Malfoys use?

Dobby Atmos

I visited a fortune teller at a fair. They were quite grumpy and told me I was going to die within minutes.

I walked out of the tent and tried to find another for a second opinion. They were a little angry, and said i would live forever. I didn't like the sound of either of those outcomes so kept looking around, but just couldn't find a happy medium.

What sound does a brass frog make?

Rivet

I went to the movies and there was a man who brought his dog into the theater with him.

After the movie, I went up to the man and I said "Hey this might sound weird, but it seemed like your dog was really enjoying the movie." The man said "Yeah, I'm suprised too, because he *hated* the book!"

I have a Slovakian friend who's a sound technician.

Oh, and a Czech one too. Czech one too. Czech one too.

You can tell the speed of light is much faster than the speed of sound.

Some people appear bright until you hear them talk.

What does a nut with the flu sound like?

*CAAAASHEW!*

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the sound noise puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working sound sound engineer piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes