Sore Back Jokes
19 sore back jokes and hilarious sore back puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about sore back that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Sore Back Short Jokes
Short sore back jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sore back humour may include short bad back jokes also.
- Why did Bill Murray's cameo have a sore back? It had to carry the new Ghostbusters movie for almost two hours.
- Why don't you need to get frozen yogurt after your SO gets back from the gym? Because you already have a Sore-bae.
- What does a Moose do when it gets a sore back? It gets a Moosage!
(Credit goes to a 10 year old patient of mine.)
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Sore Back One Liners
Which sore back one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sore back? I can suggest the ones about stiff back and my back hurts.
- Where to Egyptians go when they have a sore back? The Cairo-practor
- What do you call an Irish basketball player with a sore back? Hunch-black of Notre Dame
Sore Back Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about sore back you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean back hurt jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make sore back pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Jon was excited about his new rifle..
... and wanted to try it out, so he went bear hunting. He spotted a small black bear and shot it. There was then a tap on his shoulder and he turned round to see a larger black bear. The black bear said "You've got two choices, I either maul you to death or we have s**...." Jon decided to bend over. Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Jon soon recovered and vowed revenge. He headed out on another trip, found the black bear, and shot it. Immediately, there was another tap on his shoulder. This time a big brown bear stood right next to him. The brown bear said, "That was a huge mistake, Jon. You've got two choices. Either I maul you to death or we'll have rough s**...." Again, Jon thought it was better to comply. Although he survived, it was several months before Jon finally recovered. Outraged, he headed back to the woods, managed to track down the brown bear and shot it. He felt sweet revenge, but then there was a tap on his shoulder. He turned round to find a gigantic grizzly bear standing there. The grizzly bear said "Admit it, Jon, you don't come here for the hunting, do you?"
Jar Full of $10 Bills
A man walks into a bar and sees a jar full of $10 bills on the bar. He goes to the barkeep and says "Hey, what's up with that jar?"
The bartender responds "Well, you put in 10 bucks, do 3 challenges, and if you do them you get the whole jar."
The man says "Wow that's pretty cool, what are the challenges?"
The barkeep lists "Well, first ya gotta drink a whole bottle of hot sauce, and no nursing. Second, there's a dog out back who has a sore tooth and he's real grouchy, and you gotta take out the bad tooth bare handed. Last, there's this old lady upstairs who's never done the hokey pokey, if ya know what I mean, and you gotta fix that."
The man replies in disgust "I can't do any of those!" So the man gets drunk. Being drunk, he decides he can do anything and says "Hand me the bottle of hot sauce." So the bartender hands the man the bottle and the man drinks the whole, straight down. He then goes outside to deal with the dog. As the door shuts you hear yelping and screaming and hollering and growling and then.... dead silence... The door creaks open and the man walks in. He's all covered in blood, his shirts torn, he's missing hair... and in a drunken slur he asks "Where's the old lady with the tooth problem?"
How did the man escape from prison?
Well, he rubbed his hands to make them sore,
He used the saw to cut the table in half,
Two halves make a whole,
He jumped into the hole and got out,
Finally he shouted til his voice was hoarse then climbed on the horse and rode back home.
An old one my grandfather told before he died.
My English teacher had a sore back today.
When someone asked him why, he said, "Well, i was trimming hedges, and I finished the first one, and i felt a little pinch in my back, but i just ignored it. But after the second one, my back just gave out on me."
To which i replied: "So, like the american economy- Fine after the first bush, collapsed after the second."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Sore Paws
Little Johnny calls his dad, 'Dad those two dogs over there, why is the one at the front giving the one at the back a ride?'
'Errr, hmm, well son, the one at the back has saw front paws, so the one at the front is giving him a lift home'
'It's always the same innit dad'
'What's that son?'
'You try and help someone out, you end up getting f**...!'
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was going to get a headjob for Valentines Day
But my back was sore and I couldn't reach.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Worried due to her husband's bad cold and sore t**...,...
...his wife advises him, "Why don't you go across the street? The doctor who lives there might help you."
The husband, due to the pain in his t**..., whispers, "It's 10 in the night. Won't he be irritated?"
The wife replies, "He might be, but he might also help. Go on and ask him."
The husband reluctantly goes to the doctor's house and rings the doorbell. When the doctor's wife opens the door, he whispers, "Is the doctor in?"
The wife smiles and whispers back, "No, he isn't. Come on in."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man walks into a bar...
A man walks into a bar and sees a jar full of $10 bills. He asks the bartender what all of that money was for, since there must have been over a thousand dollars in the jar. The bartender says that you can walk away with the whole jar if you complete his challenge: A. Drink an entire bottle of tequila, B. Outside, there is an alligator with a sore tooth, and you have to pull it out, C. Next door is a woman who has never had s**..., and you have to bang her.
The man says O.K., puts ten dollars in, downs the bottle of tequila, and stumbles out of the bar. Ten minutes later, he walks back in and says,
"Alright, now where's the woman with the sore tooth?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man goes to the doctor for a sore t**.....
The doc looks into his t**..., makes his diagnosis;
doc: " Looks like you have strep. Have you taken penicillin before?"
man: " Yes I have".
doc: " Alright."
The doctor's nurse gives the man penicillin and within minutes, he starts convulsing, having a full body rash and trouble breathing. The doctor runs back into the room and yells at the man
doc: " I ASKED YOU IF YOU'D TAKEN PENICILLIN BEFORE?"
The man replies in a muffled voice: "Yea, and the same thing happened last time too"
The Train Carriage Compartment
So, traveling by train through Europe were a Ukrainian man, a Russian soldier, an old lady, and a beautiful young woman. Naturally, there was some tension, and nobody spoke.
Then the train went into a tunnel, and everything, for a moment, was pitch dark.
There's the sound of a loud kiss, a slap, and when the train emerges from the carriage, the Russian soldier is nursing a very sore cheek.
The old lady thinks: "Serves him right! How dare he take advantage of that young woman in the dark!"
The young woman thinks: "Serves him right! But I wonder why he kissed the old lady instead of me?"
The Russian soldier thinks: "That cheeky Ukrainian. He kisses the young woman, and I'm the one who gets slapped."
The Ukrainian man thinks: "Ha! I kiss the back of my hand, and I get to slap a Russian soldier!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Bar Bet
A man walks into a bar that he has never been to before. He walks up to the bar and takes a seat. The bartender asks "What are you having". The man is about to respond when he sees a large pickle jar FILLED with cash. The man asks "What's that" the bartender responds "We have a challenge here, if you can complete the three part challenge the money is yours" The man thinks about it for a while and says "What's the challenge" the bartender says "Well first you have to drink a bottle of Jack" the man says "No problem" the bartender continues "Next there is a Rottweiler outside who has a rotten tooth and you have to pull it out" The man starts to get nervous but assures himself he can do it. "Finally" says the bartender "There is a 98 year old woman upstairs who has never been laid and you have to do her" the man shivers but says "Let's do it". The bartender hands him an un-opened bottle of Jack and the man quickly c**... it down. The man continues outside wobbling to the door and for the next several minutes all anyone can hear outside is barking followed by growling and finishing with the whining. The man stumbles back inside, with his shirt torn and bite marks all over his body says "Now whhheere is the oold lady with a sore tooth?"
The pig farmer
The pig farmer is having trouble with his pigs not breeding so he visits the vet. The vet suggests he try artificial insemination, and that if successful, the pigs will roll in the mud. Being a simple pig farmer, he thinks "artificial insemination" means "do it himself."
To save his embarrassment and to give himself and the pigs some privacy, he loads them into the back of his pickup and takes them to the woods to do the deed.
The next day he wakes up and the pigs are, unfortunately, not in the mud. Back into the pickup and out to the woods for a second day...
The next morning he wakes up and the pigs are still not rolling in the mud. The farmer loads them into the pickup again and takes them out to the woods.
The next morning the farmer is too tired and sore to get out of bed so he asks his wife if the pigs are rolling in the mud. She responds, "They aren't rolling in the mud, but they're piled into the back of the truck and one of them is honking the horn."