The Best 31 Son In Law Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Son In Law jokes. There are some son in law daughter jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these son in law wife puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Son In Law Jokes and Puns

I told my son, You will marry the girl I choose.


He said, NO!

I told him, She is Bill Gates' daughter.

He said, OK.

I called Bill Gates and said, I want your daughter to marry my son.

Bill Gates said, NO.

I told Bill Gates, My son is the CEO of World Bank.

Bill Gates said, OK.

I called the President of World Bank and asked him to make my son the CEO.

He said, NO.

I told him, My son is Bill Gates' son-in-law.

He said, OK.

This is how politics works.

Then Ok!

Dad: "I want you to marry a girl of my choice."

Son: "No."

Dad: "The girl is Bill Gate's daughter."

Son: "Then Ok!" \*\*

\*\* Dad goes to Bill Gates. \*\*

Dad: "I want your daughter to marry my son."

Bill Gates: "No."

Dad: "My son is the CEO of the World Bank."

Bill Gates: "Then ok!"

\*\*Dad goes to the President of the World Bank. \*\*

Dad: "Appoint my son as the CEO of your bank."

President: "No!"

Dad: "He is the son-in-law of Bill Gates."

President: "Then OK."

Dad Knowing the Laws...

Dad: Have you heard of Murphy's Law?

Son: Yes, if something can go wrong, it will go wrong.

Dad: Yes! Have you heard of Cole's Law?

Son: Actually, no. What's that?

Dad: Thinly sliced cabbage.

How to do Business

Dad: I want you to marry a girl of my choice.

Son: No!

Dad: The girl is Bill Gates' daughter.

Son: Ok then.

Dad goes to Bill Gates.

Dad: I want your daughter to marry my son.

Bill Gates: No!

Dad: My son is the CEO of the World Bank.

Bill Gates: Ok then.

Dad goes to the president of the World Bank

Dad: Make my son the CEO of your bank.

President: No!

Dad: He is the son in law of Bill Gates.

President: Ok then.

21st Century

I was visiting my son and daughter-in-law last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper.

"This is the 21st century, old man," he said. "We don't waste money on newspapers. Here, you can borrow my iPad."

I can tell you, that friggin' fly never knew what hit it ...


A woman stopped by, unannounced, at her son's house. She knocked on the door then immediately walked in.

She was shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked. Soft music was playing, and the aroma of perfume filled the room.
"What are you doing?!" she asked.

"I'm waiting for Mike to come home from work," the daughter-in- law answered.

"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.

"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.
"Love dress? But you're naked!"

"Mike loves me and wants me to wear this dress," she explained." It excites him to no end. Every time he sees me in this dress, he instantly becomes romantic and ravages me for hours on end. He can't get enough of me".

The mother-in-law left. When she got home, she undressed, showered, put on her best perfume, dimmed the lights, put on a romantic CD, and lay on the couch, waiting for her husband to arrive.

Finally, her husband came home. He walked in and saw her lying there so provocatively.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"This is my love dress," she whispered sensually.

"Needs ironing"...

Operation successful

An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting a complicated surgery on him and.....

he insisted that his son-in-law, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation.

As he was about to get the anaesthesia, he spoke to his son-in-law.

'Yes, Dad, what is it?'

'Don't be nervous son; do your best and just remember, if something happens to me.........

........your mother in law will come and live with you.'

The surgery was a great success....

How Politics Really Works

I told my son, "You will marry the girl I choose."

He said, "No."

I told him, "She is Bill Gates daughter."


He said, "Yes."


I called Bill Gates and said, "I want your daughter to marry my son."

Bill Gates said, "No."

I told Bill Gates, "My son is the C.E.O. of World Bank."

Bill Gates said, "Okay."

I called the President of World Bank and asked him to make my son the C.E.O.

He said, "No."

I told him, "My son is Bill Gates son-in-law."

He said, "Okay.

This is exactly how politics works.

Why was the cow arrested for jumping over the moon?

Because it broke the laws of physics!!

(my son says he made this up himself!! can't find it anywhere else so maybe....)

An old woman falls asleep in church

The priest asks, "How many of you commit adultery? Those who do, stand up." Just then the old lady wakes up and asks her son-in-law, "What did he say?" The son-in-law wants to play a prank and answers "Those who take Tic Tacs have to stand up." The woman, who takes the pills by boxes, stands up. Everyone gasps, and the priest asks, "How could you, at your age?"

"Just because I've got no teeth doesn't mean I can't suck 'em!"

"Dad, what was the name of Adam's mother in law?"

"He didn't have a mother in law, son, because he lived in paradise"

You can explore son in law law reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean son in law mother dad jokes. There are also son in law puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


After talking with his girlfriend Kim, Steve reluctantly decided it was best to ask for her father's permission to get married.

"So," said Kim's father, "you want to be my son-in-law, do you?"

Not particularly, " Steve responded, "but if I want to marry your daughter I haven't much choice, have I?"

I told my brother in law, David, to name his son Harley

that way I can introduce him as Harley, David's son.

Morris had died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Morris' Last Will and Testament.

Morris had died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Morris' Last Will and Testament.
"To my dear wife Esther, I leave the house, 150 acres of land, and 1 million dollars.

To my son Barry, I leave my Big Lexus and the new Jaguar.

To my daughter Shirley, I leave my yacht and $250,000.
And to my brother-in-law Aaron, who always insisted that health is better than wealth, I leave my treadmill."

A mother in law knocks on the door, her son in law opens it....

MIL - hi Gabe, I'm here for a visit.

Gabe - cool. How long are you here for?

MIL - I don't know, as long as you want me to.

Gabe - you mean you won't even stay for a cup of tea?

Birthday Return

Friend: "What are you going to give your mother-in-law for her birthday?"

Me: "Her son back!"

Dad: Son, I want you to marry a girl of my choice.

Son: No.

Dad: The girl is Bill Gate's daughter.

Son: Okay then!

Dad goes to Bill Gate.

Dad: I want your daughter to marry my son.

Bill Gates: No.

Dad: My son is the CEO of the world's greatest bank.

Bill Gates: Okay then!

Dad goes to the CEO of the world's greatest bank.

Dad: Make my son the CEO.

CEO: No.

Dad: My son is the son-in-law of Bill Gates.

CEO: Okay then!

This is BUSINESS.

In-laws

A son would be a son-in law

A mother would be a mother-in law

A brother would be a brother-in law

But your wife, is the law.

The President's son, son-in-law, campaign manager, and a Russian lawyer walk into a bar…

finish that one for me, will ya


I said to my son, "You will be forced into an arranged marriage."

He said no. I replied with, "It is Bill Gates' daughter in law." He said yes.

I called up Bill Gates and said, "Your daughter will marry my son." He said no. I replied with "I am the CEO of the World Bank." He said yes

I called up the world bank and said, "Make me CEO." They said no. I replied with, "Bill Gates is my brother-in-law." They said yes.

My mother in law is Spanish

My mother in law is Spanish, so when we named our son 'Muchos' it really meant a lot to her.

After two years of a marriage...

Mother in law: it is time for you guys become 3 from 2

Daughter in law: I know, I have been asking your son to try a threesome but he refuses....

Cemetery Plot for Christmas

One Christmas time, an elderly woman opens her present from her son-in-law and discovers a cemetery plot inside. Despite the confusion, she thanks him very much for the gift.

The following Christmas, she approaches her son-in-law and asks where her present is. He simply replies that he didn't get one for her.

"Why not?! You always get me a gift..."

"Well, you haven't used the gift I gave you last year!!"

Little Jhonny asks his father: "Dad, why grandma is doing that weird dance in our garden?"

"Grandma to some, mother-in-law to others. Better pass me that box of ammo over there, son".

We have mothers-in-law, fathers-in-law, sons-in-law and daughters-in-law, but what is the wife?

The law.

My wife and visiting mother-in-law got mad at me when my son looked at the turkey and said....

"Dad. Where's the fat cow you said we would be serving for dinner?".

I don't think I'll be able to get my Mom what she really wants on Mother's Day – a doctor for a son-in-law.

My son said he wants to be an outlaw when he grows up

When I asked why, he said "dad you hate in-laws so much I figured I'd be the opposite!"

Wife calls her mother in-law and asks her "If your baby puked and pooped, who should it clean it up?" Mother in-law yells "the mother!"

Wife - "Then come clean up your drunk son!"

My son has an exam coming up about the court of law.

I'll testimony when he wants to be.

The father with his daughter are taking a walk to a public place of their town;



"Ann! Why are you so nervously looking around?" observes the father.

"How else can I find you a really good son in law, dad?"

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the son in law adoptive jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working son in law jared kushner piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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