The Best 87 Solve Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Solve jokes. There are some solve problem jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these solve equation puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Solve Jokes and Puns

As an atheist I find tell my maths teacher I shouldn't have to solve exponential factors

because I don't believe in higher powers

I was trying to solve an equation when I realised that the minus button on my calculator was broken...

On the plus side, it still worked.

If you could own the entirety of Bill Gates' fortune or solve world hunger,...

what color would your Lamborghini be?

Solve joke, If you could own the entirety of Bill Gates' fortune or solve world hunger,...

Physics Joke

I tried having a threeway with two physicists, but they couldn't solve the three body problem

why dont atheists solve exponential equations ?

they dont believe in higher powers.


Yo momma's so fat that objects 5 meters away accelerate at 1 m/s^2 toward her. What is yo momma's mass if G = 6.67x10^-11Nm^2/kg^2?

Please, someone help me, I can't solve it and it's making me nuts.

Confucius Say

It is only when a mosquito lands on your testicles that you realize there is always a way to solve a problem without violence.

Solve joke, Confucius Say

My company uses salt water to solve any problem.

We are called Saline Solutions.

Why can't atheists solve quadratic equations?

They don't believe in higher powers.

Can someone help me find some videos of Al Gore dancing?

I'm trying to solve a Rubik's cube and a friend told me that using Al Gore Rhythms could help.

How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just two. One to explain to the public that everything possible is being done to solve the problem, and the other to screw the lightbulb into the water faucet.

You can explore solve variable reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean solve insoluble dad jokes. There are also solve puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Relativity theory

In classical (Newtonian) physics, we can't solve the three-body problem. In the theory of relativity, we can't solve the two-body problem. In quantum mechanics, we can't solve the one-body problem, and with quantum electro dynamics, we don't even understand the vacuum anymore.

Why are redneck crimes so hard to solve...

Because everyone has the same DNA and there are no dental records.

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Not original, I heard it on satellite radio yesterday.

I highly doubt any alcohol or vodka will solve any of my life's problems

But I guess it's still worth the... shot

Why did the feminist fail algebra?

She couldn't solve inequalities

Why couldn't the tree solve the Lumberjack's riddle?

He was stumped.

Solve joke, Why couldn't the tree solve the Lumberjack's riddle?

I spent the whole night trying to solve a math problem...

and then it dawned on me.

Marriage brings two people together

to solve issues they never had before

Why did the young Mexican solve the problem so easily?

It was a no buena

My girlfriend is Mexican so I love Mexican jokes. Let me know if you have one!


Did you hear about the math teacher...

...who used a ladder to solve a calculus problem written at the very top of his blackboard?

He really rose to the equation.

Why are redneck murders so hard to solve?

There's no dental records and all the DNA matches

So I went to the doctor yesterday because I've been feeling tired all the time.

He told me I needed to quit masturbating.

I asked him if that would solve my problem. "No," he replied, "but I can't examine you while you're doing it."

There are almost no problems that cannot be solved by adding puppies into the equation...

except for world hunger...which come to think of it, they can also solve.

Why can't Athiests solve exponential problems?

Because they don't believe in higher powers.

A Blonde Tries To Solve A

A blonde has been working on her new puzzle for a couple days now but can't seem to get it right. One day, her husband comes home to his wife crying at the kitchen table. He rushes over and asks his wife why she was crying, and she replies "I've been working on the puzzle forever but can't figure it out! It's supposed to be a tiger." The husband shakes his head and says "honey put the Frosted Flakes back in the box"

How does a mathematician solve their constipation?

They work it out with a pencil

Why is it so hard to solve a redneck murder?

All the bloods the same and there are no dental records

You can't solve every problem with calculus

It has its limits

How do you solve climate change?

Convince Republicans that rising temperatures are turning people gay.

How to solve Global Warming:

Convince republicans that rising temperatures are turning people gay.

How do people in Prague solve Algebra equations?

Guess and Czech.

How does a mathematician want to solve terrorism?

He wants to simplify the radicals.

I don't see why in this day and age there aren't marches against fat shaming

Because marches would definitely solve the problem.

Mom, someone called me gangster at school today.

Mom: Dont worry I'll go tomorrow and solve this problem

Son: Make sure it looks like an accident.

I saw a book at the bookstore called "How to Solve 50% of your problem"

So I bought two

Water can solve all your issues. Want to lose weight? Drink water. Need to wake up? Splash water on your face. Someone annoying you?

Drown them.

water can solve all your problems, want to lose weight, drink mor water, want to wake up, splash want water on your face, someone getting on your nerves,

drown them

The problem with America is stupidity.

So why don't we just take the safety labels off of everything and let the problem solve itself?

Patients in an insane asylum are eating plaster off the walls,

the head doctor calls in the best doctor in the country to try and solve this problem. So the best doctor comes in and inspects the walls. He tells the head doctor to repaint the walls from red to green. The next day after the walls are repainted the head doctor comes in and sees the patients sitting and staring at the walls. "Why aren't you eating the walls now?" the head doctor asks them. "They arn't ripe yet"

Why is it so hard to solve a murder in a trailer park?

Because the DNA evidence is all the same and there are no dental records

why can't you solve a redneck crime

because there are no dental records and all the DNA is the same

A lot of people think a world without sin would be perfect

But there's only so much you can solve with cos and tan

My stalker ex-girlfriend just threatened to kill herself if I didn't take her back.

Isn't it great when problems solve themselves?

[Solved] "What does the Fox say?"

"Cancelled"

So my wife asked me yesterday "What would you do if You and I were 'Adam and Eve'?"

I replied nonchalantly, **"I'd fap and go to sleep. That would solve most problems."**

P.S: A'yup, I slept on the couch. :/

Cats don't need smart phones to solve their problems, they just sleep until the problem solves itself.

Cats: There's a nap for that.

Mother, mother, ...

... how come other children need hours to solve Rubik's cube but I do it in just a few seconds?

- Well, sweetie, it's because you're color blind.

When I was in the library I saw a book titled how to solve 50% of your problems.

So i bought 2 books

I've realized that suicide would solve all my problems....

...if I could just get the right people to try it.

Why can't atheist solve exponential equations?

Why can't atheist solve exponential equations?

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(Well, because they don't believe in higher powers.) ^(4)

If somebody offered me a coin flip to either get 10 million dollars or instantly die, I'd accept in a heartbeat. A 50 percent chance to solve all my problems would be amazing!

And even if I lost the flip, I'd still get some money.

Why was the PTA meeting homicide difficult to solve?

Because it wasn't apparent who did it.

Dear math,

Solve your own problems

A Russian enters a bar full of Turkish people.

He's wearing a t-shirt with bright lettering "Turkish got 3 problems."

Just a few seconds later the Turkishs oppose him and say "Hey, yopu know what you're wearing is insulting?"
The russian responds: "This is your first problem: You're so easily offended."

The Turkish respond: "Okay, maybe we should settle this outside."
The Russian: "That's your second problem: You always want to solve your problems with violence."

The Turkish bring him outside and pull their knives.
The Russian: "And here's your third problem. You always bring knives to gun fights."

Water can solve all your problems..

Want to lose weight?
Drink water.

Clear Face?
Drink water.

Tired of a person?
Drown them in water..

What did the dancing queen use to solve her math problems?

An ABBA-cus.

Kim Jong Un decided to send Donald Trump a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was still alive.

Trump opened the letter which appeared to contain a single-line coded message:

370HSSV - 0773H

Trump was baffled, so he emailed it to the his aides, who had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI

No one could solve it at FBI, so it went to the CIA. With no clue as to its meaning, FBI finally asked MSS (Ministry of State Security in China for help.

Within a few seconds MSS cabled back with this reply:

"Tell The President he's holding the message upside down."

Do you know why it's so hard to solve a redneck murder?

Because the DNA is all the same and there's no dental records.

Why are murders so hard to solve in Alabama?

There are no dental records and all the DNA is the same.

A detective is trying to solve a murder mystery

A lady was killed by being stabbed 17 times. The only evidence was a knife, fully made of concrete. The detective sent the knife to a lab, hoping for any DNA evidence, but unfortunately, the results came back inconclusive.

The detective was puzzled. He was sure it was concrete evidence.

A truck carrying cows and a truck carrying cannabis get into a car accident.

Neither party can agree on who's fault the accident was, so they hire a detective. This is the detective's first day on the job and his boss tells him, If you can solve this case you get a promotion, however if you fail you will be fired. The steaks are high.

A Russian dude enters a bar wearing a tshirt saying, "Turks got 3 problems."

Obvious repost

As soon as he enters the bar a bunch of Turks stop him.

Turks: you come in our country and have the balls to insult us.

Russian : that's your first problem. you guys gets offended so easily.

Turks: Let's get him outside.

Russian: that's your second problem. you wanna solve everything with violence.

*They gets outside of the bar and Turks starts taking their knives out*

Russian: that's your third problem. you bring knives to a gunfight.

Why are crimes in the 'Deep South' so hard to solve?

There's no dental records & all the DNA matches...

Math Joke

Solve carefully:

230 - 220 × 0.5 =

You probably won't believe it, but the answer is 5!

This is a good joke to play on others. Pretend you're trying to solve a crossword puzzle- and say aloud "Postman -blank-. Any ideas?"

They'll likely say something like "Postman Pat" to which you reply- "no that doesn't fit.".

Then- if they're not completely thick- they should ask "How many letters?" and you tell 'em "A SACKFUL!"

Then they'll leave in disgust.

A man buys 2 books called "How to Solve 50% of your problem" so he could solve %100

His friend calls him a moron, saying,





"You could have read it twice!"

My uncle prayed to God to solve all his family's problems

God answered his prayers.

My uncle's funeral is next week.

How does Al Gore solve math problems?

He uses an Al-Gore-ithm

Why are redneck cases the hardest to solve ?

Because all of the DNA matches and there are no dental matches.

What's one thing that can solve both world hunger and overpopulation?

Cannibalism.

How did the chief of police solve his fly infestation problem?

He called the SWAT team

Why is it almost impossible to solve a murder in Alabama?

Because they all have the same DNA.

Steve and his mother were way behind on their car payments

The repo man had been after them for a while but hadn't successfully gotten the car yet. One day Steve had an idea for a "sting" operation to solve the problem once and for all. Before he left he shouted to his mom that he was taking the car, but she was in the bathroom and couldn't make out what he said.

"What are you taking?" she asked.

"Car, ma, for repo sting!"

Why's it so hard to solve a redneck murder?

Cause the DNA's all the same and there ain't no dental records.

Bad dream

A guy went to the doctor complaining about a bad dream.

Doctor : what seems to be the problem?

Guy: I'm having dreams about this chickens playing in a soccer championship, every night.

Doctor: for how long?

Guy: must be a weak or so.

Doctor: okay, we'll solve this problem, just take this pills twice a day for a week, starting now!

Guy: OK Doc thank you but can I start tomorrow cause tonight is the final?

Four students are in the car that breaks down

First student, engineering student, says "This is mechanical problem, there's nothing we can do."

Second student, chemistry student, says "You're wrong, this is clearly reason of faulty gasoline. There's nothing we can do."

Third student, electrical engineering student, says "No, there's problem with ignition. There's nothing we can do."

Last student, IT student, says "We should exit car, close the doors, come in and try again. Maybe that will solve the problem."

I saw a book on Amazon titled How to Solve 50% of your life's problems.

Naturally I ordered two copies.

What do you call two Orthodox Jewish brothers who solve mysteries?

The Haredi Boys

Oldie but goodie

During a job interview, the interviewer asked me if I had any impressive qualities? I said, "Yes, I'm very fast with math!" Suspicious he asked me to prove it. He told me to solve 327x49. I said 34,567! He pulled out his calculator and put it in. With a confused look on his face he says, "That's not even close!" I said, "Yeah, but it was fast though!"

No idea where the original came from but this one gets me every time.

Why did the cannibal start a war?

To solve world hunger

I went to the bookstore ....

I went to the bookstore and saw a book called;
How to solve 50% of your problems. '
I bought two

Drinking alcohol doesn't solve any problems.

But then again, neither does drinking milk.

What is in the redneck's toolkit?

- Duct tape
- WD40
- Coathanger

These solve every problem around the house and in the family.

How do quesadillas solve crimes?

They take them ques by ques

Dear Math,

grow up and solve your own problems.

Redneck murders are hard to solve

There aren't any dental records and all of the DNA is the same

I tried to solve the Rubik's cube today but got nowhere with it.

Back to square one.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the solve textbook jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working solve solution piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes