Solitary Confinement Jokes
6 solitary confinement jokes and hilarious solitary confinement puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about solitary confinement that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Quirky and Hilarious Solitary Confinement Jokes to Let the Chuckles Begin.
What is a good solitary confinement joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
"I think solitary confinement is a luxury," said my friend, "don't you?"
"You're on your own there," I replied.
Judge: "You are sentenced to 2 years of solitary confinement"
Me: "Thank you."
An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman are sentenced to 20yrs solitary confinement.
The judge allows each to choose something to take with them.
-The Englishman takes 20 women with him.
-The Scotsman takes 20 years worth of whiskey.
-The Irishman takes 20 years worth of cigarettes.
After 20 long years they are all released from solitary.
When the Englishman's cell is opened he emerges with multiple children of various ages.
The Scotsman leaves his cell absolutely hammered from 20 years worth of alcohol a**....
Finally the Irishman emerges from his cell with a cigarette in his hand and asks "anyone have a light?"
Is it just me or am I the only one who enjoys solitary confinement?
Hello?
After committing very heinous crimes, three men are sentenced to 20 years of solitary confinement.
However, they are allowed to have *one* form of luxury for their sentence.
The first man requests a large stack of legal textbooks for his cell. The second man asks for a large stack of medical textbooks. The third man, on the other hand, requests 200 packs of cigarettes.
20 years have passed, and the three men are each released. The first man looks very pleased with himself and says to the wardens, "I've studied so hard I can now qualify as a *lawyer*!"
The second man looks equally proud. "I've studied so hard I can now qualify as a *doctor*," he remarks.
The third man shuffles out of his cell, looking extremely disgruntled. With a very annoyed tone, he says "Does anyone have a match?"
An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman are each locked away for a year in solitary confinement.
Before they are thrown in, they are each allowed to request a year's supply of whatever he wants to help them through the hard time.
The Scotsman asks for whisky, so he gets some and he's locked away.
The Irishman asks for a fix of Guinness, so several hundred bottles are thrown in.
The Englishman requests a year's supply of cigarettes, so he's given the cartons and he too is locked up.
When it's time to let them out, they open the Scot's door, he stumbles out shouting "FREEDOM!" before he collapses and dies of alcohol poisoning.
p**... is dragged out into the light, where he soon dies of a busted liver.
When the door to the Englishman's cell is opened, everyone waits eagerly to see what sort of state he's gotten himself into. To their surprise, he walks right out, scoots up to the nearest person and asks, "I say, you wouldn't happen to have a match, would you?"
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