Solar Eclipse Jokes
56 solar eclipse jokes and hilarious solar eclipse puns to laugh out loud. Read space jokes about solar eclipse that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Solar Eclipse Short Jokes
Short solar eclipse jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The solar eclipse humour may include short moon eclipse jokes also.
- I'm taking my wife for skydiving. So if you see a solar eclipse today, don't be surprised.
- Someone told me you can watch a solar eclipse through a colander I tried but just ended up straining my eyes.
- Thankfully, someone created an online resource for everyone who suffered retinal damage watching the solar eclipse. It truly is a site for sore eyes.
- Know your eclipses. Earth between sun and moon: Lunar eclipse.
Moon between sun and Earth: Solar eclipse.
Sun between moon and Earth: Apoceclypse. - Fun fact: 99% of voters who live in the "path of totality" for the upcoming solar eclipse voted for trump. Which is ironic, because the *last* thing they wanted to do is make the country darker.
- My Dad is like the Solar Eclipse If i make direct eye contact he'll hurt me, but when it's safe for me to look at him he already left for milk and won't be back for several years.
- What do people who make memes and solar eclipses over the US have in common? It takes them both 38 years to go all the way.
- I am surprised Trump wanted to look at the solar eclipse today... Because if he went blind all he would see is black
- You can use a cereal box to see the solar eclipse, But can they see why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch?
- I'm really worried about the upcoming solar eclipse. Because I've always heard that once you go black, you never go back.
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Solar Eclipse One Liners
Which solar eclipse one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with solar eclipse? I can suggest the ones about eclipse and solar.
- Dad can you explain to me what a solar eclipse is No sun
- RIP to all the vampires who got fooled by the solar eclipse.
- Eclipse is an acronym * Eyes
* Cannot
* Look
* Into
* Partial
* Solar
* Eclipse - What did the buffalo say during the solar eclipse? Bison...
- The next solar eclipse will be in 2024... Three or four presidents from now.
- Why is Annie the Orphan crying? There was a solar eclipse.
- The solar eclipse was cool to look at and all... But when does this darkness go away?
- What do you get when cross-eyed and looking at a solar eclipse? A solar ellipses...
- How long would it take to follow the total solar eclipse across the US? All-night.
- Your mother is so big that... ...when she is in a plane it makes a solar eclipse.
- Do you know why Turkey couldn't see the solar eclipse? It's been censored there.
- Why don't we have solar eclipses more often? Sorry, I spaced out. Wrong sub.
Hilarious Fun Solar Eclipse Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about solar eclipse you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean moon phase jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make solar eclipse pranks.
Military Humor
I had to translate. You can help me fix it.
Lieutenant Colonel to Major:
There is a total solar eclipse coming tomorrow at 9am, which does not happen every day. Assemble all soldiers on exercise field, I will provide explanation. In the event of rain, since we won't be able to see it anyway, assemble everyone in the gymnasium.
Major to Captain:
Per Colonel's order, tomorrow at 9am there will be ceremonial solar eclipse. If there is a need for rain, Lieutenant Colonel will give a separate order in the gymnasium, which does not happen every day.
Captain to Lieutenant:
Per Colonel's order tomorrow at 9am there will be solar eclipse. In the event of rain the solar eclipse will occur in the gymnasium, which does not happen every day.
Lieutenant to Sergeant:
Tomorrow at 9am Colonel will perform solar eclipse in the gymnasium, which does not happen every day.
Sergeant to Corporal:
"Tomorrow at 9am there will be eclipsing of Colonel because of the sun. If it is raining in the gymnasium, which does not happen every day, assemble all soldiers on the exercise field.
Two privates talking to each other:
Seems it will rain tomorrow. The sun will eclipse Colonel in the gymnasium. I wonder why it does not happen every day.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a deaf woman during a solar eclipse.
Whatever you want to. It's not like she's going to know.
The government will be giving out special glasses for the solar eclipse
It's called the no child left blind
For those of you in the U.S. who bought those special polarized glasses to view the upcoming solar eclipse
don't be too quick to throw them away, they can also be used to view nuclear blasts...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
This monday there will be a solar eclipse at 10am...
Followed shortly after by f**... proceedings for the Flat Earth Society.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A solar eclipse is like watching a woman breastfeed in public
It's beautiful, it's free, but under no circumstances should you look at it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The solar eclipse is like my s**... life
it will be dark, hurt your eyes and only last 2 minutes!
Every solar eclipse, children are often reported missing...
Because the parents cannot find their sun.
LPT: Scientists are warning against using a colander to view the solar eclipse
It'll strain your eyes
My Grandfather told me "I once looked at a solar eclipse for two seconds without going blind"
He also thought that today America's future looked bright
NASA has reported a solution for Global Warming
They said they'll keep the Totality Solar Eclipse there for a while while the earth chills out
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The solar eclipse is like a woman breastfeeding...
You're not supposed to look, but you know you are going to take a peek.
I'll never forget this solar eclipse, it'll forever be seared into my mind...
...and retinas. I really should've worn some glasses.
LPT: When the next solar eclipse rolls around, you can use a colander to view the eclipse.
Just be sure you don't strain your eyes.
Directly after witnessing the total solar eclipse, my vision was 180/20...
...my vision was also 180/20 before the eclipse, but still.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The solar eclipse is the most exciting thing in my entire life!
Because it lasts longer my s**... life...
I really wish someone would have told me how long this solar eclipse was going to take.
Don't get me wrong, I had been enjoying watching it, but had I know it would still be going on for this long, I would have bought a pair of those fancy NASA glasses.
The solar eclipse was like a one night stand
I spent a whole lot of effort for two minutes of pleasure.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What does a broken c**... and a solar eclipse have in common
They are both major disappointments.
What do you call a piece of mint that's been lying under the sun for an hour?
A solar Eclipse
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A solar eclipse is like a woman breastfeeding
It's beautiful, it's natural, it should be celebrated, but that still doesn't mean you should stare at it
A _solar_eclipse is when the moon is between the Earth and the Sun. A _lunar_ eclipse is when the earth is between the Moon and the Sun. What's it called when the sun is between the moon and the earth?
The apocalypse…
