Following is our collection of funny Software Engineering jokes. There are some software engineering networking jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these software engineering massachusetts institute puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
...just not very many of them.
On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
"What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married 10 times?"
"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative. He kept telling me how great it was going to be.
Husband #2 was in software services. He was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.
Husband #3 was from field services. He said everything checked out diagnostically, but he just couldn't get the system up.
Husband #4 was in telemarketing. Even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
Husband #5 was an engineer. He understood the basic process, but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
Husband #6 was from finance and administration. He thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
Husband #7 was in marketing. Although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.
Husband #8 was a psychologist. All he ever did was talk about it.
Husband #9 was a gynecologist. All he did was look at it.
Husband #10 was a stamp collector. All he ever did was... God! I miss him!
But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm going to get screwed."
A Mechanical Engineer, Project Manager and the Software Engineer were driving down a mountain when suddenly the car slides off the road and rolls down the Mountain. Amazingly none of the occupants had been hurt.
The Mechanical Engineer steps out and says hand me my Swiss army knife I will have this repaired in no time and we can be on our way.
The Project Manager says Wait Up, We need to set achievable goals, set a timeline and ensure we are all working with maximum efficiency to solve this problem.
The Software Engineer Just says "Wow! that is strange, lets push it back up and see if it happens again"
when it breaks down. The mechanical engineer speaks up and says, "It must be the engine!" The electrical engineer says, "No, it must be the wiring." The software engineer finally speaks up and says, "Guys, guys... Let's just all get completely out of the car and then get back in."
suddenly the car stopped. The mechanical engineer said "it must be a problem with the motor", the chemical engineer said "no it's most likely a fuel problem", then the software engineer said "maybe if we all get out, then get back in, it will start"
He asked god why he was dead at such an early age. God replied "Son, according to the billable hours you filed in your time sheet you should be 92 by now "
I didn't have the heart to tell him that means he'll be making the coffee.
and he orders a beer, Orders 0 beer, orders 32769 beers, orders 99999999 beers, orders a lizard, orders -1 beers, orders gksbfkagfiau.
There are two eternal problems in traditional software engineering:
1. Garbage collection
2. Naming things
3. Off-by-one errors
Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots.
So far, the Universe is winning.
It's a little buggy.
You can explore software engineering technology reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean software engineering algorithms dad jokes. There are also software engineering puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
...are riding in a truck that breaks down. They get out, and tries to see what he can see under the hood, but doesn't know anything about cars, another calls a tow truck and waits, and the third says "I don't know what's wrong, let's just get back in the car and see if it happens again"
How many software engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Zero, lightbulbs are hardware.
On their first day at work, Pumbaa's code keeps returning errors for several hours. Finally, Timon says: "Why don't you take a break? I'll fix you some bugs."
When two beggars meet each other and two software engineers meet each other after a long time,
the question asked is the same .
On which platform are you working these days?
Zero, that's a hardware problem.
My buddy's daughter came up with this. She is 4.
A couple of bytes
Their first day in the office, Timon spends three hours straight working on a huge piece of code, but it keeps returning errors.
Finally, Pumbaa says: "Hey Timon, why don't you take a break? I'll fix you some bugs."
Can't be done, it's a hardware problem.
Dev Patel
The extrovert looks at your feet when talking.
He's staring at *your* shoes
FeMail.com
A programmar.
Code - a - line
...and morphine ...and adderall
Because he had a race condition.
They're not trigger errors.
Applying for a software engineer's role at Volkswagen.
1) How many software engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
Does not compute. It's a hardware problem.
Had he been clad with harder clothes, he might have survived.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the software engineering mit jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working software engineering engineers piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.