Softens Jokes

Hilarious puns and funny pick up lines

A student comes to a young professor's office hours...

She glances down the hall, closes his door, and kneels pleadingly. "I would do anything to pass this exam." She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, gazes meaningfully into his eyes. "I mean..." she whispers, "I would do... anything."

He returns her gaze. "Anything?"

"Anything."

His voice softens. "Anything??"

"Absolutely anything."

His voice turns to a whisper. "Would you... study?"

The lead singer of Smash Mouth is up late with a friend.

The lead singer of Smash Mouth is up late with a friend. His wife's not home; the past few nights she's returned past midnight with increasingly elaborate alibis. He's getting frustrated; he loves her, but he's not sure he can keep giving her the benefit of the doubt. His friend asks what he's going to do when she shows up. His face contorts in frustration. "When I see her face..."

He softens.

"Imma believe 'er."

An attractive student goes up to her young professor...

and she says to him "I want an A for this semester!"

He says "No."

She then says "Please... I will do *anything* to get an A..."

The professor's expression softens. "Anything...?"

The student nods.

The professor says "So would you like to... study?"

Why do cartels, always cut cocaine with Tide?

It softens the blow!

What's the difference between boiling water and a woman's hands?

Boiling water softens a piece of meat. A woman's hands does the opposite.

What are the funniest softens jokes of all time?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking about Softens? Well, here are the best Softens puns to laugh out loud. Crazy and funny Softens pick up lines to share with friends.

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