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Soda Jokes

158 soda jokes and hilarious soda puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about soda that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Start the day with a fizzy laugh - check out these funny jokes about soda! From baking soda to diet soda, orange soda, grape soda, 7up, and even lemonade, get the inside scoop on the lighter side of these classic drinks.

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Funniest Soda Short Jokes

Short soda jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The soda humour may include short coca cola jokes also.

  1. Last night a movie theater was robbed of over $1000 dollars. The thieves took one large bag of popcorn, two large sodas and a pack of Skittles.
  2. 9 out of 10 doctors reccommend for children to drink water instead of soda that 1 doctor lives in flint michigan
  3. I dreamed I drowned in an ocean made of orange soda. When I woke I realized it was just a Fanta sea.
  4. Breaking News: A movie theatre has just been robbed of over two thousand dollars The theives took a large soda and two bags of popcorn
  5. Working at the aluminum can recycling center is the saddest job I've had. It's just soda pressing.
  6. I dreamed that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda But then I woke up. It was just a fanta sea.
  7. My Mom said to stop drinking soda because it has acid in it. I replied," Stop making such baseless accusations".
  8. My wife told me to pick up 8 cans of soda on my way home from work. She was pretty mad when I only picked seven up.
  9. Nine out of ten doctors suggest you drink water instead of soda. The one that doesn't lives in Flint, Michigan.
  10. Why was the man who crushed recycled pop cans for a living sad with his life? Because his job was soda pressing.

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Soda One Liners

Which soda one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with soda? I can suggest the ones about soft drink and coca.

  1. I got hit on the head with a can of soda yesterday. Lucky it was a soft drink
  2. I used to have a job crushing cans. It was soda pressing.
  3. I had a job as a can crusher but I had to quit That job was just soda-pressing
  4. What's Pamela Andersons favorite soda? Hepsi!
  5. What sort of scientists does Soda Stream employ? Fizzyscists
  6. I saw a Pepsi getting run over today It was soda- pressing
  7. Last night I dreamed the oceans were made of orange soda. But it was just a Fanta sea.
  8. I used to think an ocean of soda existed. Turns out it was just Fanta sea.
  9. Did you hear about the can of coke that got run over? It was soda pressing
  10. Why does the can crusher hate his job? Because it's soda pressing.
  11. I was feeling really sad while crushing cans today... It was soda pressing.
  12. Tell me girl, do you like soda? Because I'd mount 'n do you. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
  13. Boy, I just got hit in the head with a can of soda. I was lucky it was a soft drink.
  14. So someone threw a can of soda at me today. I'm alright though it was a soft drink.
  15. How does carbon dioxide make soda so bubbly? By obeying the laws of fizz-ics.

Orange Soda Jokes

Here is a list of funny orange soda jokes and even better orange soda puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I've always dreamed of swimming in an ocean of orange soda Its a fanta-sea of mine
  • I dreamt that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda... But I woke up and realized it was just a fanta sea.
  • I sometimes dream of a rivers of orange soda But it's just a fanta-sea
  • I had a dream last night where I was drowning in an ocean made from orange soda... It took me a while to figure out that it was a Fanta sea.
  • Last night I dreamt that I was drinking orange soda... But the I woke up and realized that it was just a Fanta-sea.
  • TIFU by sleeping with my Crush Now there's orange soda all over my bed. :(
  • I've always wanted to replace the Mediterranean with orange soda I guess it's always been my biggest Fanta Sea.
  • I thought I was drowning in an ocean
    of orange soda yesterday....
    It took me a while to work out it was
    just a Fanta sea.
  • I want an ocean of orange soda It's a Fanta sea of mine
  • I had a dream last night that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. Then I woke up and realized it was just a Fanta sea.

Soda Pop Jokes

Here is a list of funny soda pop jokes and even better soda pop puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • A soda company printed Michael Jackson on all of their cans He really is the king of pop
  • Why is crushing pop cans taxing on one's mental health? Because it's soda pressing.
  • I quit my job crushing pop cans today. It was just soda pressing.
  • You may think I'm paranoid But I think diet soda is just another form of pop elation control.
  • People who make soda jokes. People who make soda jokes must know a lot about pop culture.
  • Why was the balloon scared of having a soda? He didn't want to pop.
  • I would request a last meal of soda and pop rocks so I could die on my own terms.
  • I was crushing old pop cans when one squirted old soda on me. It was soda pressing.
  • Crushing pop cans is... Soda pressing
  • I see you're crushing pop cans... ...That must be soda pressing
Soda joke, I see you're crushing pop cans...

Baking Soda Jokes

Here is a list of funny baking soda jokes and even better baking soda puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Did you hear about the guy who needed to snort a line of baking soda every day? He was basically addicted.
  • What do you get when you put Cola in an oven? Baking soda
  • What does the baking soda say when he gets sad? I'm sodapressed.
  • What do you get when you put soda in the oven? Baking soda!... I'll leave now
  • Why do I add baking soda to my pumpkin spice lattes? To make them even more basic.
  • What's a joke that you invented? Here's mine:
    Did you hear about the guy who had to snort a line of baking soda every day?
    He was basically addicted.
  • What is the driest soda you can buy? Baking soda.
  • My wife is really mad at me because I accidentally handed her washing soda instead of baking soda. It left her foaming at the mouth.
  • My girlfriend said she wanted to experiment more in the bedroom... I don't know why she got so mad when I put my baking soda and vinegar volcano next to the nightstand.
  • Did you know the baking soda packets are training their children to be police officers? Yeah, they're raising agents.

Diet Soda Jokes

Here is a list of funny diet soda jokes and even better diet soda puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • My doctor told me my soda consumption was the cause of my diabetes... so I switched to diet soda, and now I only have diet-betes.
  • The machine poured me a diet coke with no caffeine in it. That was just soda pressing.
  • You're nickname should be "Diet Soda" Because you made yourself think you're sweet.
Soda joke, You're nickname should be "Diet Soda"

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about soda can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of soda puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Cheerful Soda Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!

What funny jokes about soda you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean pepsi coke jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make soda prank.

A Baptist preacher sits next to a cowboy on a flight...

After the plane took off, the cowboy asked for a whiskey and soda, which was brought and placed before him.
The flight attendant then asked the preacher if he would like a drink.
Appalled, the preacher replied, "I'd rather be t**... and taken advantage of by women of ill-repute, than let liquor touch my lips."
The cowboy then handed his drink back to the attendant and said, "Me too, I didn't know we had a choice."

A blonde...

...is at a soda machine outside a gas station. A man walks up to her because he sees she has her arms full of soda cans. She put in another quarter, and yet another soda pops out. Another quarter, another can. He finally asked her, "Why do you keep putting money into the machine? I think you have enough." She replied, "I can't help it. I keep winning!"

Did you hear about the man who got hit in the head with a can of soda?

He was lucky it was a soft drink.

A grandfather and his grandson in the supermarket

A woman in a supermarket is following a grandfather and his badly behaved three-year-old grandson. It's obvious to her that he has his hands full with the child screaming for candy in the candy aisle, cookies in the cookie aisle and for cereal and soda in the other aisles.
Meanwhile, Granddad is working his way around, saying in a controlled voice: "Easy, William, we won't be long, easy, boy."
Another outburst, and she hears the granddad calmly say: "It's OK, William, just a couple more minutes and we'll be out of here. Hang in there, boy."
At the checkout, the little t**... is throwing items out of the cart, and Granddad says again in a controlled voice: "William, William, relax buddy, don't get upset. We'll be home in five minutes; stay cool, William."
Very impressed, the woman goes outside where the grandfather is loading his groceries and the boy into the car. She says to the elderly gentleman: "It's none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don't know how you did it. That whole time, you kept your composure, and no matter how loud and disruptive he got, you just calmly kept saying things would be OK. William is very lucky to have you as his grandpa."
"Thanks," said the grandfather, "but I'm William. The little s**...'s name is Kevin."

Why did the soda can quit its job at the vending machine?

It was soda pressing.

Cans

I work in a can recycling factory.
My job is to crush cans.
I don't enjoy it. It's soda pressing.

Why did the flattened can of Coke want to off itself?

Because it was soda pressed!

A sad man walks into a Coca-Cola carbonation factory...

But he leaves because it was just soda pressing.

What do you call it when you open a soda for a buddy who is in outer space?

An astrofizzassist.

as i get to the soda machine...

... I find a blonde already there. She puts in some change, makes a selection, and the soda pops out at the bottom of the machine. She then puts in more change, makes a selection, and again, another soda appears.
This goes on for several minutes and I finally ask if I could step in and get a soda really quickly.
The blonde looks up and glares at me. "Are you kidding? Not while I'm winning!"

Did you hear they discovered a soda cavemen drank?

It's a carbon dated beverage...
Good jokes are good

A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender: "I'll have a whisky and….......... soda." The bartender says: "Why the big pause?" "Dunno" says the bear. "I've always had them."

Everyone says soda is bad for you...

but OJ will kill you.

I agree

I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so I sat down and had a cold soda.
The day was really quite beautiful,
and the drink facilitated some deep thinking on various topics.
Finally I thought about the age old question:
Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts?
Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful
than a guy getting kicked in the nuts.
Well, after another soda, and some heavy deductive thinking,
I have come up with the answer to that question.
Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby;
and here is the reason for my conclusion.
A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say,
"It might be nice to have another child."
On the other hand, you never hear a guy say,
"You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts."
I rest my case.

I feel like a crushed Coke can on the sidewalk.

Soda pressed.

How do you make an elephant float?

Take one elephant, two tons of ice cream, and one ton of soda. Blend.

A nutritionist is giving a speech at a conference on eating healthy

Red meat is terrible for your metabolism, soda rips apart your gastric wall. Fast food is almost all fat and sugar but there's one food that is the worst of all. Almost all of us eat it sooner or later and the negative effects can last for years after a single consumption. Does anyone know what this is?
After a moment of silence an elderly specialist sitting in one of the front rows gets up and says "wedding cake"

The night before the wedding

The bride-to-be and her bridesmaids were giggling over tequila and strawberry daiquiris at the bachelorette party. The maid of honor started a game of truth or dare.
"If your boyfriend were a soda, what would he be?" she slurred at the other bridesmaid.
"7-Up, because he's got seven inches and he can keep it up. What about you?"
"Mountain Dew. He knows how to mount and do me. And what about the future Mrs. Johnson? What kind of soda is Matt?"
"Jack Daniels," said the bride proudly.
"But that's not a soda! Jack Daniels is a hard liquor!" protested her friends.
The bride looked at them and said, "Girls, why do you think I'm marrying him?"

A joke told by an old man.

I was speaking to an old man at the grocery store yesterday when he told me something interesting about the olden days of america.
Old man: Son, back in the day my mother could give me a dollar and I could run to the store and get myself a candy bar and a soda pop, and still have money left over to buy the milk my mom asked me to get.
Me: s**... you can not do that today!
Oldman: Yeah, I know son! Now a days, there is just way to much security . . .

Why does pushing my finger against a bottle of Pepsi make me sad?

Because it's soda pressing.

A movie theater was robbed of $150 worth of candy

The thieves took 2 bags of M n' Ms and a small soda

Arthur Guinness

The leaders of the big beer companies meet for a drink. The president of Budweiser orders a bud, the Ceo of Miller gets a Miller, the head of coors orders a coors, and so on. Until it's Arthur Guinness's turn, he orders a soda. "Why didn't you order a Guinness?" everyone asks. "Nah" Guinness replies. If you guys aren't having a beer,then neither will I.

My job testing fizzy drinks is really getting to me...

It's soda grading.

A can crushers job must be...

Soda pressing.

A really sad man committed s**... by crushing himself with a vending machine

He was soda pressed.

whats a math teachers favorite soda

root beer

Me: Do you want something to drink?

Me: We've got this new soda called 'Princess Di.' It's a tribute to Princess Diana
Friend: Got anything else?
Me: Just Mountain Dew.
Friend: So those are my only two options?
Me: It's Dew or Di.

A latino goes to a vending machine

He gets a soda for 75c. He puts in 65c. The machine says "dime", so he whispers quiero una pepsi porfavor

Why couldn't the crumpled can of coke get out of bed in the morning?

Because it was soda pressed.

How much soda does Kim Jung Un drink in a day?

A Supreme Liter.

How much soda should tropical birds drink?

Two cans

9 out of 10 doctors recommend drinking water over soda

Not Dr. Pepper.

I want to make a sad YouTube channel where I compress soda cans

I'll name it "Soda Pressing"

I crushed my coke can today...

It was soda pressing :(

A woman was arrested for bringing her own popcorn, candy, and soda to the movie theater.

She was fined and had to pay court fees, but the good news is she still came out a few bucks ahead from if she would have bought the popcorn at the theater.

What did the Coke can say when we got crushed?

I'm soda pressed.

I got hit in the head with a soda can yesterday...

I'm just glad it was a soft drink.

What kind of soda do the Guardians of the Galaxy drink?

Groot Beer!

I had a dream about swimming in an ocean of soda last night.

Turns oout it was just a Fanta-sea.

Scott Pruitt has resigned to focus more on his true passion..

Throwing uncut plastic soda rings into the ocean.

What's a prostitutes favorite soda?

Mount-and-do

What did the 24oz bottle of soda say to the 32oz bottle of soda?

Take me to your liter

A pessimist sees the glass half empty; an optimist see the glass half full.

Dave: (reading) a pessimist sees the glass half empty; an optimist see the glass half full.
Wife: [returning from the kids room] why is half my soda gone?
Dave: because you're a pessimist.

A monkey and a weasel go to a bar in California

The monkey sits down at the bar and orders a beer. He gestures at the weasel and says, "he's driving though, so no beer for him." The bartender turns to the weasel and says, "alright, what'll you have?"
"Soda," goes the weasel.

I wanted to buy a drink from a vending machine, but there was a guy in front of me.

I tried to wait my turn patiently, but he just kept buying soda. I stood there for a while just watching him put in some money and take his drink, over and over until he had a whole bag of soda cans. He showed no signs of stopping, so I asked him, "Why do you keep doing that? Are you ever going to give anyone else a turn?"
He smirked and replied, "You're just jealous because I've won every time!"

How much soda can a tropical bird drink?

Tucans

Doctor, I'm worried about my son. He spends all day measuring imaginary bottles of orange soda.

Don't worry ma'am, it's normal for boys his age to spend their time fantasising.

Back in the days, I'd only take just $1 with me to the supermarket and came back with 3 bottles of soda and 2 bags of crisp

But these days, there are surveillance cameras everywhere

What do you call a doctor who drinks a lot of soda?

A fizz-ician (physician)

A squirrel in the refrigerator

A man comes home after a hard day's work and opens the refrigerator
to get a soda. Inside, he sees a squirrel taking a nap.
What are you doing in my fridge? the man asks.
The squirrel opens one sleepy eye and says, Isn't this a Westinghouse?
Um, yes, the man replies. It is.
Well then, the squirrel says, shutting his eyes again, I am twying to west.

Which state serves the smallest drinks?

Mini soda

Soda joke, Which state serves the smallest drinks?

jokes about soda

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these soda jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.