Snowden Jokes

Following is our collection of blizzard puns and aleutian one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Snowden jokes for adults, dirty moscow jokes and clean whistleblower dad gags for kids.

The Best Snowden Puns

Why couldn't the whistleblower leave his house?

Because he was Snowden

A tip for Snowden.

Apparently he is traveling all of the world but if you never want to appear in front of an American judge there is only one place to go...

Guantanomo bay

What did Edward Snowden say when he bumped into Barack Obama?

Pardon me

Why couldn't the American leave Russia?

He was snowden

Why was Putin late for dinner with Obama?

Because he got Snowden.

Why couldn't the man leave Moscow?

He was Snowden.

What do you call a whistleblower stuck in a blizzard?


why does the NSA hate blizzards?

Because they get Snowden.

Why couldn't Edward leave Russia?

He was Snowden!

[OC] Why does the NSA hate winter?

Because they're not used to getting Snowden.

(I'll see myself out)

Why wasn't the CIA employee able to go home to visit his family for Christmas?

Because he was Snowden.

Why could Edward not leave his driveway and get back to his home country?

He was Snowden.

Did you hear about the whistle-blower who couldn't make it home for Christmas?

He was Snowden.

What does a whistle-blower do during a Russian blizzard?

Nothing, he's Snowden.

Why was the NSA computer programmer late for work?

Because he got Snowden

Why did Edward miss his flight out of Russia?

Because he was Snowden.

Why couldn't the NSA agent leave his house this Winter?

He was Snowden.

Where's the best place for Edward Snowden to hide?

Wallstreet. No one there ever seems to get prosecuted.

Why can't Edward leave Russia this winter?

He'll be Snowden.

Edward Snowden was discovered trapped inside of one of his ski lodges this Saturday, November 19th.

"Edward Snowden Snowed in Snowden Snow Den."

Why couldn't the NSA do anything after the blizzard?

Because they were Snowden.

Why doesn't Boston like whistleblowers during the winter?

Because they always seem to get Snowden

Why couldn't the NSA leave their houses?

They got Snowden.

Edward Snowden just joined Twitter. Almost immediately he got more followers than the NSA.

Luckily for the NSA, they follow a lot more people than Snowden.

What did the NSA say to Russia after the blizzard?

We're Snowden!

Why didn't Edward leave his house?

Because he was Snowden.

What do you call it when you can't leave Russia cause it's precipitating under 32 degrees?


Quick Snowden

Transition into a woman

What do you call a blizzard at NSA headquarters?


The bad weather kept my friend Edward from going to work today

He's Snowden

Why couldn't he whistle blower leave Russia?

Because he was Snowden!
Get it? Snowed in? Snowden?'ll get it tomorrow.

Why couldn't Edward leave the Airport?

Because he was Snowden...

What do you call a refugee in a blizzard?


Why couldn't Edward go to school?

because he was Snowden.

Why does Edward never leave Russia?

He's always Snowden.

Have you heard about Edward Snowden's brother Jon Snowden?

He knows nothing...

Why does the NSA hate the winter?

They always get Snowden

Why did the whistleblower wait until summer to move to Russia?

It doesn't really Snowden.

The NSA wants Edward Snowden to leave Russia.

NSA: Hey Edward, you should really come back to America so we can talk.

Edward: I can't. I'm Snowden.

How did the man get stuck at the Russian airport?

He got snowden.

The NSA Agent

Why couldn't the NSA agent leave the Russian airport?

Because he got Snowden!

Why was Edward late for work at the NSA?

He was Snowden.

Why has Edward been in Russia so long?

Because he was Snowden.

Why was Edward stuck in Russia?

He was Snowden

Living in Russia...

Living in Russia in the winter, you're already snowden.

Why couldn't the whistleblower step outside?

Because it's Snowden.

What did the whistleblower say after the blizzard in Russia?

I'm Snowden!

Why was it easier for the whistleblower to leave American soil earlier in the year?

It didn't Snowden.

What do Midwesterners have in common with Whistleblowers this week?

They're both Snowden.

There is an abundance of internyet jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 49 funniest jokes and snowden puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any snowy witze you can hear about snowden.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes