The Best 63 Snow Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Snow jokes. There are some snow snowbank jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these snow snow removal puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Snow Jokes and Puns

A weather report for you

I just got off the phone with a friend living in North Dakota near the Canadian Border. He said that since early this morning the snow has been coming down, it is nearly waist high and is still falling. The temperature is dropping way below zero and the north wind is increasing to near gale force. His wife has done nothing but look through the kitchen window and just stare. He says that if it gets much worse, he may have to let her in.

Two Snowmen are in a field...

...and one turns to the other and says "Yeah, you're right, it DOES smell like carrots."

My favorite joke - short, hysterical, and perfect for any occasion.

What did the Seven Dwarfs say when the prince woke up Snow White?

Welp.... I guess it's back to jerking off!

Snow joke, What did the Seven Dwarfs say when the prince woke up Snow White?

One snowman says to the other snowman,

"do you smell carrots?"

Why did the snowman take his pants off?

He heard the snow blower was coming.


Snow wife.

One winter morning while listening to the radio, Bob and his wife hear the announcer say, "We are going to have 4-6 inches of snow today.
You must park your car on the even numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through."

Bob's wife goes out and moves her car.

A week later while they are eating breakfast, the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 6-8 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through."

Bob's wife goes out and moves her car again.

The next week they are having breakfast again, when the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 8-10 inches of snow today. You must park..." then the electric power goes out.

Bob's wife is very upset, and with a worried look on her face she says, "Honey, I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the plow can get through?"

With the love and understanding in his voice like all men who are married to blondes exhibit, Bob says, "Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time?"

Recently I felt Funny and came over Queasy...

At which point I was told to leave the local theatre adaption of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.

Snow joke, Recently I felt Funny and came over Queasy...

What's white, cold, falling in winter and ending with "bass" ?

The snow, dumbass.

What is the difference between Snow White and Brazil?

Snow White had the excuse of being asleep before letting seven in.

Snow White and the Three Dwarfs met Goldilocks and the Seven Bears at a party last week

They exchanged numbers

Let's hear it for snow!..

The only time that four inches can keep a woman in bed all day.

You can explore snow snowman reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean snow snowy dad jokes. There are also snow puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Husband and wife are arguing...

The husband thinks it's raining

His wife says, "No honey, that's snow"

So they ask Rudolph, their soviet friend what he thinks.

He says, "That is rain, comrade."

The husband says, "See! Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."

John Snow.

John Snow was at a bar outside the great wall drinking. A beautiful girl comes inside and her eyes meet his. She likes him, so she goes and introduce herself.

-Hello, handsome. My name is Jenny Spring. What's yours?

John laughs and continues with his drink.

-Why is this funny?

John responds,

-Nothing. I just imagine how rare it would be to have 7 inches of Snow in spring...

Where does a polar bear keep his money?

In a snow bank.

I hate it when..

I hate it when my black friend disappears in the dark,

My white friend in snow,

My Chinese friend in sand,

And my Middle-Eastern friend in drone strikes.

Why did Jon Snow stand in line for 6 hours at the Apple Store?

For the watch

Snow joke, Why did Jon Snow stand in line for 6 hours at the Apple Store?

Father looks out the window on a snowy evening.

He gets furious and turns red.

"What's the matter, dear," his wife asks.

"It's our daughter's new boyfriend. He's written his name in the snow with pee."

"Oh. That's not so bad."

"Yeah, but it's in *her* handwriting."

Why did the snowman smile?

He heard that the snow-blower was in town.

Why was the snow yellow?

Elsa let it go.


How do you find Will Smith in the Snow?

I don't know. Just look for the Fresh prints! Ha ha.

He's also black.

Why was the snowman smiling?

He saw the snowblower coming.

Why is sex like snow?

Because you never know how many inches you'll get or how long it will last..

Why do Indians hate snow?

Because it's white and settles on their land.

A Russian Couple

A Russian couple is walking in Moscow when the man feels a drop hit his nose. "It's raining," he says. "No," says his wife, "It's snowing." And they begin to argue. Finally, the man says, " Let's ask comrade Rudolph what the *official* weather is." They approach and they ask him. "It is officially raining." he says. The woman cries, "But it felt just like snow!" To which her husband says, "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!

I lose my White friends in the snow, I lose my Black friends at night, I lose my Asian friends in the sand, where do I lose my Arab friends?

In an explosion.

Looks like we got about 4 inches of snow last night

Or as my boyfriend calls it... 7.

Friends are like snow

when you pee on them, they disappear.

Why don't native Americans like snow?

Because it's white and all over their land.

There's an old Native American man that sits in a teepee along the road I take to work.

Every morning for a while now I stop in and ask him what the weather will be that day. Rain, snow, sun, clouds. He's always right.

Well yesterday I stopped in just like normal and asked what the weather was going to be like.

"Got no clue", he said.

I was shocked. "What's different about today that you don't know?"

He just shook his head sadly. "Radio broke."

What do you call a Buddhist monk who meditates in the snow?

Fro-zen.

Why do Aboriginals hate snow?

Because it's white and on their land.

Why do Indians not like snow?

It is white and settles on their land.

Why did Walt Disney fire Snow White?

'Cause she kept sitting on Pinocchios' face singing 'tell me lies, tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies'.

*Joke's from my Dad and his friend*

Why is Jon Snow so ticklish?

Aunts in his pants...

There was a lady with 3 sons, named Rain, Snow and Brick

Rain asked his mom, Why is my name 'Rain'?
Because a raindrop fell on your head when you were born.
Then Snow asked his mom, Why is my name 'Snow'?
Because a snowflake fell on your head when you were born.
Then Brick asked his mom, NYANYANYANYA

What's the difference between Switzerland and Columbia?

In Switzerland, snow is measured in meters, in Columbia in kilograms.

What was the snowman doing in the carrot section of the grocery store?

Picking his nose

What do snowmen eat for breakfast?

Snowflakes.

Cr

The snow in the UK is pretty bad right now

So I thought I'd check on my elderly 85 year old neighbour Valerie to see if she needed anything from the shops.

She said she did so I gave her my list too, no point us both going out in this weather.

So far we have four inches of snow on the ground.

Or as my husband would say...seven inches.

In North Korea, you cannot throw fruit in the snow...

Because they do not have the right to freeze peach.

1 and 2 went out for a walk in the snow.

1's hands got so cold that they went numb.

2's hands and feet both got cold, so he was even number.

Snow White and the 7 Dwarves were all in bed feeling happy

Happy left soon afterwards, so they started feeling grumpy

Why do native Americans hate the snow?

...because it is white and settles all over their land.

how can you find will smith in the snow?

look for fresh prints

Trump looks out on the snow covered White House Lawn, and notices that someone has pissed Trump Sucks in the fresh snow.

Furious, he demands the Secret Service investigate. A few days later, the head of the SS says Mr President, I've got good news and bad news. The good news is we've done a dna test on the urine, and found the culprit. It turns out it's Mike Pence's. That traitor , shouts Trump. I'll have him hanged! Now, what did you say was the bad news? Well , says the SS chief, turns out it's Melania's handwriting .

Snow isn't a problem in the Middle East

...but ISIS

Living in the northeast, I don't normally get mad about snow.

But this snitch ass weatherman just let my wife know what six inches actually looks like.

Why do natives hate snow

Because its white and it settles on their land.

Told to me by a six year old.

Why was the snow yellow?

Because Elsa let it go!


I am a waiter and I have regular family every week on Monday. I exchange jokes with the youngest boy and he always wins free dessert. This week however he won a free meal for the whole family. I laughed til I made yellow snow

Edit. Did not know it was my cake day! I think this is my first joke post. Just wanted to share.

Why do Native Americans hate snow?

It's white and on their land

A blonde got lost in her car in a snow storm. She remembered what her dad had once told her: "If you ever get stuck in a snow storm, wait for a snow plow and follow it." Pretty soon a snow plow came by, and she started to follow it.

She followed the plow for about forty five minutes. Finally the driver of the truck got out and asked her what she was doing. She explained that her dad had told her if she ever got stuck in the snow, to follow a plow.

The driver nodded and said, "Well, I'm done with the Walmart parking lot, now you can follow me over to Target."

Record low temperatures causing snow and freezing all over the southern United States.

Finally: white people in Texas are having problems with ICE.

Some Yank had the audacity to say us Texans were dumb for not having Snow Tires. Bless their heart.

We may not have as much experience as y'all Yanks when it comes to snow, but after tinkering with it a couple minutes I think all of us Texans can agree to try and make a tire out of snow is a pretty dumb idea.


We'll keep our tires made of rubber, thanks.

Carnival is offering a new voyage where you set sail and leave a bunch of senior citizens behind in the snow.

It's called a Ted Cruise

Snow isn't a problem in Islamic countries

But ISIS

Two drunk men are eating out of a crock pot in the snow.

Neither of the men know what they are eating.

The first man says Wow, this soup makes it feel hot out here!

The second man looks in the pot, takes a bite, and says No no, I think it's chili.

Little Timmy is skiing on a mountain with his family

At a certain point, he decides that it would be nice if he impressed his mother, so he shouts: "look mom, without hands!", then proceeds to drop the ski poles on the snow and go down.

After he manages to return on the top, he shouts again: "look mom, without seeing!" then puts his wool hat on his eyes and go down, but he crashes against a tree out of his family's sight.

Then he returns again up, and shouts to his mother: "look mom, without teeth!"

I bought a crystal ball but only ever predicted very cold winters.

Turns out they sold me a snow globe.

Snow White gets into a hot tub and starts feeling a little happy

Happy gets out and she starts feeling a little grumpy.

Grumpy gets out and Bill Cosby gets in and she starts feeling a little sleepy.

If a class going to cosmetology school can't make it because of a snow storm…

Do they have a make up day?

What is the difference between a Snow man and a Snow woman?

Snow balls

Why do Native Americans hate snow?

Because it's white and settles on their land.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the snow snow man jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working snow snow plow piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes