Sniff Jokes
55 sniff jokes and hilarious sniff puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about sniff that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Everyone loves a good joke, and now you can have a good time with a unique twist - scratch and sniff jokes! Experience the stench of fresh humor with jokes that come with a scent. Freshen up your day with a laugh and a whiff!
Funniest Sniff Short Jokes
Short sniff jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sniff humour may include short snort jokes also.
- A major difference between men and women is if a woman says "Sniff this." it usually smells nice.
- Why doesn't Joe Biden visit children with cancer in hospitals? Because he can't sniff their hair.
- My friend's dog has been trained to sniff drugs. It's brilliant, he can even roll up his own $20 bill.
- The moment we find out dogs really could sniff out coronavirus infections... We'd ask WHO, let the dogs out! WHO! WHO!
- Easter Kids' Joke Why can't you sniff out Easter Eggs?
(In a tone like you have no idea) "No bunny nose"
-Made up this morning in bed to a very dissatisfied girlfriend - The public pool had to be shut down because they found five drowned blondes in the deep end. Some kid had put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom.
- I love how Canadian money is Scratch n Sniff! American money is too, just not intentionally.
- How to freak her out I love walking up to women I barely know, hug them and sniff loudly followed by me saying, "You smell so much better when you are awake."
- *sniff...sniff* Guy: "Honey! Do you smell that?" Girl: "No babe."
Guy: "Yeah me neither, start cooking." - why couldn't the imperial guard sniff out the money trail in skyrim? because of a deviated septim
Share These Sniff Jokes With Friends
Sniff One Liners
Which sniff one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sniff? I can suggest the ones about sneeze and snoop.
- What do you call an STI in your nose? Sniff-illis
- I can't afford aromatherapy so I just randomly sniff stuff and hope.
- What's the difference between a snort and a sniff? Nobody knows the answer yet.
- What do you call a dog that sniffs out drugs? Snoop Dogg
- I keep getting kicked out of museums... Something about them not being scratch and sniff.
- Why do dogs sniff each other's butts? Because they're allowed to.
- sniff I sniff it I lick it if I lick it I \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ it?
- Why Do Kids In High school Take Art? You don't have to pay for the glue to sniff...
- When a dog sniffs a fire hydrant They are just checking their pee-mail.
- Solvent a**... It's nothing to sniff at.
- Dogs and c**... addicts are a lot alike They both just wanna sniff
Scratch And Sniff Jokes
Here is a list of funny scratch and sniff jokes and even better scratch and sniff puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My cat is the opposite of a scratch n sniff sticker First he sniffs me, then he starts stratching
- Plans are already underway for a Trump Library... It's the first time a Presidential library will have *just* scratch and sniff books.
Uplifting Sniff Jokes to have Hilarious Fun with Friends
What funny jokes about sniff you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean smell jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make sniff pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Probably old, but I got it in email and it made me chuckle.
An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her
return, her father cursed her heavily. "Where have ye been all this
time, child? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why
didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mother
through?""
The girl, crying, replied, 'Sniff, sniff... Dad...I became...a p**...."
"Ye what!!? Get outta here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a
disgrace to this Catholic family."
"OK, Dad, as ye wish. I just came back to give Mum this luxurious
fur coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion plus a $2 million savings certificate.
For me little brother, this gold Rolex, And for ye, Daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes Limited Edition convertible that's parked outside, plus a membership to the country club... (takes a breath)... and an
invitation for ye all to spend New Year's Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera."
"Now what was it ye said ye had become?" asks Dad.
The girl, crying again answered, "Sniff, sniff...a p**..., Daddy!
Sniff, sniff."
"Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant.
Come here and give yer old Dad a hug!!!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Irish p**...- An old joke but still good!
An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her return, her father cursed her.
Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old mum thru?
The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff....dad....I became a p**......."
"Ye what!!? Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this family."
"OK, dad-- as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion plus a savings certificate for $5 million."
"For me little brother, this gold Rolex and for ye daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside plus a membership to the country club....(takes a breath)....and an invitation for ye all to spend New Years' Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera, and...."
Now what was it ye said ye had become?" says dad.
Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff....a p**... dad! Sniff, sniff.
"Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant. Come here and give yer old man a hug.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What is the difference between paint and a midgets' underpants?
When you sniff paint, you get high
Holy Moly! - What's that smell!?
A mama mole, a papa mole, and a baby mole all lived in a little mole hole. One day the papa mole stuck his head out of the hole, sniffed the air and said: "Yum! I smell maple syrup!"
The mama mole stuck her head out of the hole, sniffed the air and said "Yum! I smell honey!"
The baby mole tried to stick his head out of the hole to sniff the air, but couldn't because of the bigger moles were in the way so he said: "Geez, all I can smell is..."
Are you sure you're ready?
You may never forgive me for this one...
*MOLASSES*
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two dogs meet on the street and sniff each other...
Finally one says, "I don't recall your name but your f**... familiar."
Topical Jokes for 1/31
The CEO of McDonald's has announced he'll be resigning later this year. It's the first time in history that a McDonald's employee has quit and given more than five seconds notice.
The New Hampshire lottery is selling scratch 'n sniff tickets that smell like bacon. The aroma is there to remind people that if they didn't waste their money on lottery tickets, they could afford to eat bacon.
In Alabama, a truck driver caused a mile-long traffic jam when he swerved off the road while trying to pull out a loose tooth. Drivers slowed down to look, because people in Alabama had never seen someone who has a tooth.
Suge Knight is suspected of running a man over with his car after an argument. The argument was about whether or not there's a pumpkin-flavored Jelly Belly.
...running over someone with your car seems crazy, but you have to keep in mind that Suge Knight's motto is Live every day like it's 'The Purge.'
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Person A: Do you know the shelf life of c**...?
Person B: I don't know
Person A: Nobody knows. Sniff
There are now dogs that can sniff out cancer in its earliest stages.
Looks like the end of the CAT scan.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What are the similarities between c**... and Gain detergent?
A:With both of them you go sniff sniff hooray!
I never had a girlfriend because of how I smell..
I sniff their armpits while looking them straight in their eyes.
You know what they say about those dogs that sniff out cancer...
They have an excellent sense of tumour.
A man goes shopping for candles...
He's strolling through Bed Bath and Beyond, when he finally locates the candle section. So many options to pick from, he starts to give them all a good test sniff. As he's smelling more and more candles he wrinkles his brow and remarks to himself "All these candles smell funny..."
So he catches the attention of an employee and asks her, "Ma'am why do all of these candles smell so funny?"
"Well sir, that's our new Scents of Humor line!"
Vampire bats fly out of their cave and into the night looking for blood.
As the sun begins to rise the following morning, all of them return without consuming a single drop of blood, no one could find any food that night.
All except one, Gerald, who flies back in with blood pouring down his fangs.
"I searched all night for some blood, didn't even get a sniff of the stuff", one bat says to Gerald. "How on earth did you find some?"
"You see that rock in front of the cave entrance?", said Gerald.
"Yeah", said the other bat.
To which Gerald replies, "Well, I didn't."
Anytime I bring something new in the house my dog always has to sniff and inspect what it is..
And I realized that dogs can be pretty nosy.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If you scratch and sniff a Canadian dollar, you can smell maple syrup
If you scratch and sniff an American dollar, you can smell a stripper's p**... hair
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
'How long does c**... last?' asked my friend.
'Depends how quick you sniff it,' I informed him.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do you get a Blonde to commit s**...?
You put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.
A Frenchman and a Mexican are sitting on a bench.
The Frenchman will occasionally sniff his fingers and say, "Ah, Fifi. My Fifi."
One day the Mexican asks, "What is this you're doing with the 'Fifi'?"
The Frenchman responds, "Every morning I finger my wife, Fifi, so I can smell her and think of her fondly. "
The next morning the Mexican finds the Frenchman on the same bench, sniffing his fingers and mumbling "Fifi."
The Mexican sits down next to him, rolls up his sleeve, and takes a long sniff from his elbow to the tips of his fingers...
"JUANITA!!!"
My neighbor has a 15 acre farm, he breeds dogs to do work on them. He grows cantaloupe, and come harvest time the dogs sniff out the ripe ones and bring them back to the barn.
He says the breed are Melon Collies
Glue-sniffing drug addicts
A group of experienced glue-sniffers was teaching a newcomer to sniff glue.
But instead of sniffing the glue, the glue sniffer poured it into his mouth, and had to go to the hospital emergency room.
"Hey," reminded one of the glue-sniffers. "Don't expose our glue-sniffing group."
"Don't worry," replied another. "His lips are sealed."
Sniffs
Two dogs were walking down the street. One dog says to the other, "Wait here a minute, I'll be right back." He walks across the street and sniffs this fire hydrant for a minute, then walks back across the street. The other dog says, "What was that about?"
The dog first dog says, "I was just checking my messages."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
When I was young I used to sniff gasoline to get high…
These days we switched to c**... to save some money.
Tracker
So the cowboys hire a native american tracker. The tracker would often dismount his horse, look closely at the ground, sniff, put his ears on the ground, etc.
So today they are riding a trail. Tracker asks for a halt, gets off the horse and holds his ears to the ground. Gets up says "Buffalo come!"
Cowboy says "Wow! You can feel the vibrations of the herd moving?"
Tracker : "No. Face sticky!"
