smirnoff Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious smirnoff puns

Whata country..

You might remember comedian Yakov Smirnoff. When he first came to the United States from Russia he was not prepared for the incredible variety of instant products available in American grocery stores.

He says, "On my first shopping trip, I saw powdered milk -- you just add water, and you get milk. Then I saw powdered orange juice -- you just add water, and you get orange juice. And then I saw baby powder, and I thought to my self, "What a country!"

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The official bad Yakov Smirnoff punchline thread about the Sochi Olympics

You have been warned...

In Russia, yellow water is not dirty, it's colored that way by Russian government so we don't mistakenly drink water instead of vodka!

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I'm trying to remove a poop stain with vodka.

It's Smirnoff.

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Viagra Cocktails

Mountain Dew + Viagra - Mount and Do

Jack Daniels + Viagra - Jack-Off Daniels

Smirnoff + Viagra - Sperm Off

Budweiser + Viagra - Nut Wiser

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Why does Peter Dinklage drink Smirnoff?

Because he can't reach for the Grey Goose

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My favorite Yakov Smirnoff joke about the good old USSR.

In America you find the party. In Russia the party finds you.

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What are Islamic extremists favourite drink?

Smirnoff Isis

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What do teenage terrorists drink?

Smirnoff ISIS

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What is the only alcoholic beverage Muslim extremists are permitted to drink?

Smirnoff ISIS

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What do terrorists love to drink?

Smirnoff ISIS.

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Smirnoff bought pabst

Now traded as pab-smir

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What are the most funny Smirnoff jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Smirnoff? Well, here are the best Smirnoff dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Smirnoff pick up lines to share with friends.

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Joko Jokes