Smell Jokes
185 smell jokes and hilarious smell puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about smell that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Looking for a laugh? Check out our collection of smell jokes. From stinky jokes to fart jokes, we've got all the best stinkers in one place.
Quick Jump To
- Short Smell Jokes
- Smell One Liners
- You Smell Jokes
- You Smell Like Jokes
- Fart Smell Jokes
- Smell So Bad Jokes
- Covid Smell Jokes
- More Smell Jokes
Funniest Smell Short Jokes
Short smell jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The smell humour may include short fragrance jokes also.
- This girl I met on Tinder had a tattoo of a seashell on her innerthigh If you put your ear against it and listened closely, you could smell the sea.
- My girlfriend got a tattoo of a shell on her thigh Every time I lay my ear on it I can smell the sea.
- I happily dad joked my fiancé While on her way to work, she texted me saying she only put deodorant on one side.
To which I replied, "At least you won't smell half bad!" - I once met a girl with a tattoo of a conch on her inner thigh When I put my ear to it I could smell the sea
- I like the smell of mothballs. But it can sometimes be hard getting their little legs apart.
- Why did Dwayne 'the rock' Johnson's family get tested for COVID-19 They couldn't smell what the rock was cooking.
- My girlfriend got a tattoo of a seashell on her inner thigh… When I hold my ear up to it I can smell the ocean!
- I stopped showering or changing my clothes, as a precaution against COVID-19. If anybody gets within six feet of me, I know they must have lost their sense of smell.
- People shouldn't be shamed for their kinks. Me, I get really turned on when someone smells like musty sweat and coal. But I always get called a monster when I admit to being attracted to miners.
- I knew a girl with a tattoo of a seashell on her inner thigh She said if you put your ear up to it, you could smell the ocean.
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Smell One Liners
Which smell one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with smell? I can suggest the ones about taste and scents.
- New Teslas don't come with a new car smell They come with an Elon Musk.
- I like my women like I like my coffee I've never had coffee but it smells really nice
- Did you know Teslas don't have that new car smell? They have more of an Elon Musk.
- Teslas do not have New Car smell… They have an Elon Musk
- I love the smell of my f5 key... It is very refreshing
- What do you call new car smell in a Tesla? Elon's Musk
- Why does Piglet smell so bad? Because he plays with Pooh
- Why are people with foot fetishes always losers? They love the smell of defeat.
- What do you call a rapper that smells nice? Post Cologne
- What does a new tesla car smells like? Elon Musk
- What's blue and smells like red paint?
blue paint. - Today I got slapped for telling a girl her hair smelled nice. I hate being a dwarf.
- What's got no teeth and smells? The gearbox in the wife's car...
- What's blue and smells like red paint? Blue Paint.
- ps5 candle joke PS5 smells like you are not getting one !
You Smell Jokes
Here is a list of funny you smell jokes and even better you smell puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- So my girlfriend got a new tattoo...... Of a seashell located on her inner thigh, and the best part is if you place your ear next to it you can smell the ocean.
- (6-year old brother gave me this one) Why do farts smell? So that deaf people can enjoy them too!
- My girlfriend has a tattoo of a sea shell on her inner thigh. When you put your ear on it, you can smell the ocean.
- What do a pizza delivery driver and a gynecologist have in common? They both get close enough to smell the goods but if they eat it they'll be in trouble.
- What's the difference between a toddler and a Capitol Rioter? Toddlers have more teeth, smell better, and have thrown tantrums for more justified reasons.
- What do a pizza delivery boy and a gynecologist have in common? Always have to smell it, never get to eat it.
- Why do some covid patients need to take a shower? Because they are starting to smell again
- What do a gynocologist and a pizza boy have in common? They can smell it but they cant eat it!
- If you lose your sense of smell due to Covid, here's a simple fix. Just reset to olfactory settings.
- My wife recently got a seashell tattooed on her thigh. When you put your ear close to it, you can really smell the ocean.
You Smell Like Jokes
Here is a list of funny you smell like jokes and even better you smell like puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How is a gynecologist like a pizza delivery boy? They both get close enough to smell it, but if they eat it, they'll be fired.
- Why is a pizza delivery guy like a gynecologist? They're allowed to smell it, but they get in trouble if they eat it.
Teehee - What is green and smells like bacon? Kermit's fingers
- Two Snowmen are in a field... ...and one turns to the other and says "Yeah, you're right, it DOES smell like carrots."
My favorite joke - short, hysterical, and perfect for any occasion. - What does the Illuminati smell like? New World Odor
- I've always wondered what mothballs smelled like. But I could never get their tiny legs apart to find out.
- What is green and smells like a pig? Kermit the frog's finger
- What do Popeye's fingers smell like? Olive oil.
- I told a Chinese guy that they always smell like Chinese food. He said "aw that's lo, mein."
- What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit Farts
Fart Smell Jokes
Here is a list of funny fart smell jokes and even better fart smell puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Bought a deodrant stick today... It said 'remove top and push up bottom'
I can hardly walk but my farts smell lovely. - Why do Farts Smell so Bad? So the deaf can enjoy them too.
- What is the best thing about getting COVID? Your farts don't smell anymore.
- I got a new deodorant today. The instructions said "remove cap and push up bottom".
Now I can hardly walk, but my farts smell AWESOME - Why doesn't the queen's farts smell? Because it's a noble gas.
- Courtesy of my kid when she was seven: what's invisible and smells like bananas? Monkey farts
- What does it smell like when a cow farts? Dairy-air
- 2 Egyptians noticed their farts smelled the same. They had a Tutankhamen.
- If a clown farts... ... does it smell funny?
- What's Invisible and Smells Like Mice? Cat Farts...
Smell So Bad Jokes
Here is a list of funny smell so bad jokes and even better smell so bad puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why do French ghosts smell so bad? Zay are, ow you say, "covered in sheet".
- Why do black people smell bad? So blind people can hate them too
- What do you give a house that smells bad? A basemint
- My apartment was starting to smell bad so I bought myself a candle. It just makes scents.
- What do you call a fairy that smells bad Stinkerbell!
- Why does it smell so bad in Moscow? The prime minister has been Putin since 1999
- Why do farts smell so bad? So deaf people can appreciate them too
- Why did the Earth smell so bad after the meteor hit it? Because afterwards the dinosaurs were all egg stink.
- Why do girls wear make up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.
(Hopefully no one said that joke on here. I heard it from South Park a while ago) - Two old ladies are sitting on a bench Suddenly one of them smells something bad and asks her friend "Sylvia, doesn't it smells like a decayed carcass in here?...Sylvia...?Sylvia...?
Covid Smell Jokes
Here is a list of funny covid smell jokes and even better covid smell puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Dwayne Johnson and his family all contracted COVID.. They figured it out when they couldn't smell what the rock was cooking.
- The Rock and his family just got diagnosed with Covid-19 No one at his home can smell what he's cooking tonight.
- The Rock has come down with COVID-19 So he can't smell what he's cooking :(
- People have been using crystals and essential oils to protect themselves from covid. Their corpses smell great and look very fashionable.
- With losing your sense of smell from COVID-19 being a symptom, I no longer call it f**... in a crowded elevator. I call it a free COVID-19 test
- They say President Trump first noticed he may have Covid-19 When he couldn't smell the b**... coming out of his own mouth.
- f**... under the covers is no longer called a Dutch oven... It's a free Covid test. If you can still smell or taste it, you're negative.
- f**... under the bed sheets is no longer called a dutch oven. It's now called a covid test. If you can smell it you don't have covid.
- Since I contracted Covid-19 our s**... life has been so much better Seeing as I can't smell or taste.
Giggle-Inducing Smell Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends
What funny jokes about smell you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean stink jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make smell pranks.
4 out of 5 urologists...
...smell their apple juice before they drink it.
It's a miracle!
An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut.
The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?"
"Just water," says the priest.
The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?"
The priest looks at the bottle and says,
"Good Lord! He's done it again!"
So I dragged off this girl from the bar the other night...
She had this cool tattoo of a seashell on her inner thigh. Damnedest thing, though! When I put my ear to it, I could smell the ocean.
Why does the Pakistani prefer the toilet over making love to his wife ?
The hole is tighter, and the smell is better.
Why is six afraid of seven?
Six hasn't been the same since he came back from Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he sees Charlie hiding in the darkness, dead bodies hanging in the canopy, and remembers the smell of blood and gunpowder.
When he sees seven, he is reminded of those days.
Joke in honor of mole day
Three moles are going through the ground looking for food.
The first mole pops up out of the ground and sniffs around.
He says "hey guys I think were getting close I smell some syrup".
The next mole pops up and says "ya we must be a smell some syrup too".
The last mole pops up and says "I don't know guys all I smell is some molasses"
My friends all say I'm a c**... addict, but I disagree.
I just like the smell.
Two moles
Two moles are going down a tunnel. The one behind says: I think I smell molasses.
My girlfriend got a tattoo of a seashell on the inside of her thigh.
If I put my ear on it I can smell the sea.
The Skunk
One cold night, this couple was driving down the road, and the girl notices this black ball of fur on the side of the road. She makes him pull over, and she sees that it's a skunk that's about to freeze to death. She asks him, "Can we bring him with us in the truck to warm it up?"
He says, "I guess it's okay. Bring him in."
She goes, "Where can I warm him up?"
"Put him between your legs, that'll warm him up."
"Well, what about the smell?"
"You can hold it's nose, can't you?"
The Bacon Tree
Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States, wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says...
"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell? Ees bacon, I theenk."
"Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon. "
With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.
There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon... Every imaginable kind of cured pork.
"Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Ees a bacon tree."
"Luis, maybe ees a meerage? We ees in the desert don't forget."
"Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like
bacon...ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree."
And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree. He gets to within 5 metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly a machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock. Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath;
"Pepe... go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!"
"Luis, Luis mi amigo... what ees it? "
"Pepe.. ees not a bacon tree. Ees
Ees
Ees
Ees
Ees a ham bush...."
adam and eve finally figured out the whole s**... thing...
afterward, adam's kicked back, dazed.
god asks "son, where's eve?"
to which adam replies "she's down at the stream, washing up."
god groans "now i'll never get that smell outta those fish."
There were 3 moles living in a hole...
One day, they wake up to the smell of pancakes cooking. The first mole sticks his head out of the hole and says "I smell pancakes!" The second mole sticks his head out of the hole and says "I smell syrup!" The last mole tries to stick his head out of the hole, but gets stuck behind the other two, so he said "All I smell is molasses."
Mother's Day
Two children ordered their mother to stay in bed one Mother's Day morning. As she lay there looking forward to breakfast in bed, the smell of bacon floated up from the kitchen.
But after a good long wait she finally went downstairs to investigate. She found them both sitting at the table eating bacon and eggs.
"As a surprise for Mother's Day," one explained, "we decided to cook our own breakfast."
moles
Mama mole, papa mole, and baby mole all lived in a hole. One day, mama mole stuck her head out and sniffed the air.
"That's weird, I smell grape jelly."
Papa mole squeezes up beside her, sniffs around, and says, "That's funny, because i smell strawberry jam."
Baby mole wanted to sniff the air too, but was stuck behind mama and papa mole, so he said "That's strange, all I smell is molasses!"
God sees Adam in the Garden of Eden...
...and asks him how things are going with him and Eve. "Great!" Says Adam. "We just finished having s**...! s**... is wonderful!" God asks, "Speaking of Eve, where is she?". To that Adam Replies "Oh, she's down at the beach washing up." God is furious. "WHAT? NOW I'LL NEVER GET THAT SMELL OFF OF THE FISH!"
An old woman decides to get a physical after a number of years.
While the doctor is examining her she mentions that over the years she has learned to f**... silently and they never smell anymore. The doctor said "Ok, that's great", finishes up the exam, gives her a prescription and tells her to come back in a couple of weeks.
When she returns, she complains that her farts now smell awful.
"Good" he said. "Now that we've cleared out your sinuses let's work on your hearing."
An old married couple are driving down the road.
They run over a mama skunk and the wife insists that they go back and pick up the baby skunk.
She says to her husband, "The poor thing is freezing."
"Put him between your legs and warm him up." is the husband's reply.
"But what about the smell?" she asks.
The husband says, "Just hold his little nose and he should be fine."
The Bacon tree
Two Mexican brothers are lost in the desert.
They're hungry and thirsty, and have been walking for miles on end.
Suddenly, Jose yells at his brother. "Brother! Do you smell that? It smells like bacon!"
He rushes ahead, and sure enough, over the next dune, he sees it. A bacon tree. Glorious strips of crispy bacon, glistening in the sun, waiting to be eaten.
Jose runs head long at the tree, just as his brother climbs the dune behind him. Suddenly two machine guns pop out of the bacon tree and cut him down!
He turns to his brother, and with his last breath he yells out
"Brother! Is not a Bacon Tree!"
"Is..."
"Is a..."
"Is a Hambush..."
My wife said I smelled nice and asked what I have on.
I said I have a hard on, but I didn't think you could smell it.
My ex-girlfriend has a tattoo of a seashell on her inner thigh.
and if you hold your ear against it, you can smell the sea.
Two kids are watching 2 dogs making love.
The female kid asks:
> How do the dogs know when they want to have s**...?
> The boy: I don't know... Maybe they smell it.
They sit and watch them a little more. And after a while the female kid asks:
>Do you have a runny nose?
Three moles smell something.
Papa mole first pokes his head out of the hole and sniffs. He then says "I smell some good pancakes and syrup." Next mama mole pokes her head out of the hole and says "all I smell is fruits and honey." Then baby mole tries to poke his head out of the hole and says " I can't smell anything except molasses."
A young Korean couple are lying in bed...
When the guy starts f**... nonstop.
The girl, unable to take the smell, says, "Stop, that's disgusting!"
"Don't blame me", the guy says. "It's the dog."
"Oh, don't blame him", she says. "He was cooked perfectly."
I'm starting to get self-conscious about my body odour...
On my last two dates the woman has sprayed me with perfume before we had s**.... I can't quite place the brand but it had a distinct sharp peppery smell.
Whats a similarity between a pizza delivery guy and a gynecologist?
They both smell it, but they can't eat it.
Have you ever smelled mothballs?
How did you get their tiny legs apart?
There once was a family of moles in their mole hole when one smelled something sweet...
The father mole stuck his head out of the mole hole and said "is that honey?" So the mother mole squeezed through the hole next to the father and smelled "that may be maple syrup! It smells so wonderful!" The baby mole, wanting to see what all the commotion was about, frustratingly couldn't fit between the father and mother mole. So he wailed " All I smell is molasses!"
There's that moment when you put your steak on the grill and your mouth waters all over from that amazing smell...
Do you vegans feel the same when you mow the grass?
I smell maple syrup!
A mama mole, a papa mole, and a baby mole all live in a little mole hole. One day the papa mole sticks his head out of the hole, sniffs the air and says, "Yum! I smell maple syrup!"
The mama mole sticks her head out of the hole, sniffs the air and says "Yum! I smell honey!"
The baby mole tries to stick his head out of the hole to sniff the air, but can't because the bigger moles are in the way. So he says, "Geez, all I can smell is . . . . .
molasses."
An elderly couple are sitting in a church
The man lets out a silent f**... while the priest is talking.
He then says to his wife "I've let out a silent f**..., everyone here will smell it. What do I do?"
His wife then says to him, "You get your hearing aids fixed"
A couple finds a wounded skunk on the road. 'Where do I put it?' the lady asks...
A man and a woman are driving along when they see a wounded skunk on the side of the road. They stop, the woman gets out, picks it up, and brings it into the car.
She says, Look, it's shivering … it must be cold. What should I do?
He says, Put it between your legs.
She says, What about the smell?
He says, Hold its nose.
Two parrots were sitting on a perch
One says to the other... Do you smell fish?
A state trooper pulls over a priest
A state trooper pulls over a priest. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?" "Just water," says the priest. The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?" The priest looks at the bottle and says, "Good Lord! He's done it again!"
Some campers wake up in the morning and start making breakfast...
Nearby is a family of moles living in their burrow underground. Papa mole wakes up and crawls up to the hole and says, "It smells delicious up here! I can smell sausage and eggs and is that some ham frying too?" So mama mole climbs up and she's greeted with the sweet smells of breakfast. "I smell fresh toast and flap jacks and maybe a hint of cinnamon!" Baby mole tries to enjoy the smells but can't get past mama and papa through the hole and says, "All I can smell is molasses."
My wife has a tattoo of a shell on the inside of her thigh...
It's a really weird thing, when you lay your ear on it you smell the sea.
- I hope it came off right, thats an old joke they tell in my country
4 million of these people enter our country every year. They are uneducated, unskilled, and contribute nothing. They are a burden to honest, hardworking Americans and our government is doing nothing to stop them, not to mention they're dirty and they smell bad. THEY DON'T EVEN SPEAK ENGLISH!!
I really hate babies.
Most women would love to wake up on their birthday to the smell of fresh coffee, a nice breakfast, flowers and o**...
But not my Sister.
I was having dinner at my girlfriend's house for the first time.
"Excuse me, I just need the toilet," I said, excusing myself from the table.
"Don't forget to spray the air freshener!" joked the dad.
I said, "No need. c**... doesn't smell."
A priest is pulled over for speeding...
Smelling alcohol on the priest breath and noticing a wine bottle in the passenger seat of the car, the highway patrolman asks, "father, have you been drinking?"
"just water," the priest replies.
"Then why do I smell wine on your breath?" quipped the patrolman.
The priest looks down at the bottle and exclaims, "good Lord he's done it again".
Edited for u/littlekiing
An Irish priest is driving along a country road when a police man pulls him over.
He immediately smells alcohol on the priest's breath and notices an empty wine bottle in the car.
He says: "Have you been drinking?"
"Just water," says the priest.
The cop replies: "Then why do I smell wine?"
The priest looks at the bottle and says: "Good Lord! He's done it again!"
What did God say when he saw Eve walking out of the sea competely n**...?
Jeez, I'll never get that smell out of my fish.
Grandma's Apple Pie
An old man is dying, with his young grandson by his bedside. He asks his grandson to lean over and whispers "Johnny, I smell your grandma's apple pie. Looks like she took it of the oven. Go to the kitchen and bring me a piece. It's my favorite."
Johnny gets up and leaves. 2 minutes later he comes back empty handed and says "Sorry, grandpa, but grandma says its for after the f**...."
Don't you hate it when you're driving along smoking a cigarette, you flick it out the window and you drive for a couple more miles and smell something funny and you look over onto the back seat and sure enough..
Grandma's f**... herself again
A friend of mine got a seashell tattoo on her thigh...
If you put your ear up to it, you can smell the ocean
Julie Andrews withdraws her endorsement
Julie Andrews will no longer be endorsing Revlon Vibrant Shades lipstick, as she claims it breaks too easily and makes her breath smell.
In a statement she said, "The super color fragile lipstick gives me halitosis."
Barack and Trump found themselves at a local barbershop. As the barbers finished their shaves, the one who had Trump reached for the aftershave. Donald was quick to stop him, saying, "No thanks. My wife, will smell that and think I've been in a brothel."
The second barber turned to Barack and said, "How about you, Mr. Obama?" Barack replied, "Go right ahead, my wife doesn't know what the inside of a brothel smells like.
A mommy mole, daddy mole, and baby mole are together in their burrow
Mommy mole sticks her head out and sniffs the air. She asks, "What's that smell? Is it brown sugar?"
Daddy mole sticks his head out to sniff around, "No I don't think so. Smells like vanilla to me."
The baby mole still in the burrow says "I don't know what you guys are talking about. All I can smell is molasses!"
Me and the wife love Skunks and decided to smuggle one home but had to get past border control, the wife says how we going to do this? I said put it down your p**..., she said what about the smell?
I said, well if it dies it dies...
There was a family of moles underground.
They were just relaxing down there when the father mole pokes his head out the hole and says wow, I smell sugar . The mother mole is interested so she pokes her head out the hole and exclaims wow I smell glucose! Then the mother mole calls her son over and he says holy cow I smell fructose! The sister mole wants to catch a whiff of the smell and climbs to the hole. Sadly the hole is clogged by her family and she said all I smell is molasses
Her: Do you think our kids are spoiled?
Me: No, I'm sure most kids smell that way.
I met this girl with a tattoo of a sea shell on her inner thigh
She told that if I put my ear to it, I can smell the ocean.
When I'm grilling a steak, the smell of the juices makes my mouth water.
Wonder if that happens when a vegan mows their lawn.
My wife got a new tattoo on her inner thigh.
It's a seashell. When you put your ear on it, you can smell the ocean.
An old man is at home on his death bed
When suddenly he smells something amazing. It's the smell of his favorite chocolate chip cookies. And with his last strength, he gets out of bed, and he goes to the kitchen, where his wife of 50 years, is cooking these beautiful chocolate chip cookies. And they are on a plate of four of them, just out of the oven. And with his last human strength, he reaches over to take one of the cookies, and his wife sees him, she rushes over, she slaps his hand, and she says, "No, they are for the f**...."
Recently a new supermarket opened nearby
It has an automatic water mist generator to keep the produce fresh.
Just before it starts the mist, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.
When you pass the milk section, you hear cows mooing and you get the scent of freshly cut hay.
In the meat department there is the aroma of charcoal grilled steaks with onions.
When you approach the egg counter, you hear hens cluck and cackle, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of eggs frying.
The bread department features the tantalizing smell of fresh baked bread and cookies.
I don't buy toilet paper there any more…
