Smart Watch Jokes
26 smart watch jokes and hilarious smart watch puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about smart watch that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Smart Watch Short Jokes
Short smart watch jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The smart watch humour may include short apple watch jokes also.
- "Smart" Televisions. What do regular TVs and "smart" TVs have in common?
You watch TV on them.
What's the difference between a "smart" TV and a regular TV?
A "smart" TV watches you too. - When I was a younger kid, I smart-mouthed my mom and she told me to 'watch it'. Now I'm afraid of clowns and balloons. What was mom thinking?!
- People think the government is always watching everything you do... No, you're telling them everything you do and they're just smart enough to store it, big difference...
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Smart Watch One Liners
Which smart watch one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with smart watch? I can suggest the ones about wrist watch and wristwatch.
- New Smart Watch GV09 Watch Phone
- New and Cheap Smart Watch G2
- What do you call the smart Asian that created a watch company? Breitling
- What did one smart watch say to the other smart watch? The time is 7 am!
Smart Watch Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about smart watch you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean smart phone jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make smart watch pranks.
A priest notices a little boy down the street
Trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street. However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high for him to reach. After watching the boy's efforts for some time, the priest moves closer to the boy's position. He steps smartly across the street, walks up behind the little fellow and, placing his hand kindly on the child's shoulder leans over and gives the doorbell a solid ring. Crouching down to the child's level, the priest smiles benevolently and asks, "And now what, my little man?"
To which the boy replies, "Now we run!"
Smart dog
A man walks into a bar, after buying a beer he looks around the bar and sees three men and a dog playing cards. Amazed, the man wanders over and starts watching the game. Aftere watching the game for ten minutes, the man leans over to one of the other player's and whispers " Wow, that's a really smart dog!".
The man whispers backs "He isn't that smart, every time he gets a good hand, he wags his tail!"
A man is playing chess with a horse in the park.
A man is playing chess with a horse in the park.
A passer-by stops and watches them amazed. After a while ha says to the man: "Wow, your horse is playing chess? It must be really smart."
The man replies: "You call it smart? He hasn't won for like twelve games straight."
It was smart to use Khloe Kardashian in those ads for migraine medication.
I know that not all people that have migraines watch the Kardashians, but everyone who watches the Kardashians has migraines.
"You are what you eat," they say... Oh really???
If so, then my spaghetti is fabulous and incredibly smart, made of extra-ordinary wheat with its own weird sense of humor, dancing salsa when nobody's watching and sweating its little spaghetti pants off while doing calisthenics.
I will never e**... spaghetti the same way ever again...
What's your pasta like? ;)
A man went to visit a friend and was amazed to find him playing chess with his dog.
He watched the game in astonishment for a while.
“I can hardly believe my eyes!” he exclaimed. That’s the smartest dog I’ve ever seen.”
“Nah, he’s not so smart,” the friend replied. I’ve beaten him three games out of five."
A man was watching TV and tossing peanuts in the air and eating them.
His wife calls him and he turns his head while eating one and it goes into his ear.
They try in vain to take it out when their daughter comes home with her boyfriend after a date.
The boyfriend says he can help and puts two fingers up the man's nose and asks him to blow hard and out pops the peanut.
After the boyfriend leaves, the wife remarks, "Wow, that's a smart boy our girl is dating! What do you think he is going to become when he grows up?".
"From the smell of his fingers, our son-in-law", says the man.
Me and my step son were watching letters and numbers
Letters and numbers is a show where contestants are given a certain number of letters and 30sec to make the biggest word or 6 different numbers and 30sec to reach a target number using only those given once with the standard 4 operations.
So I'm watching with my son and one of the contestants is a dwarf/midget (the politically correct term) and he is smashing it! He managed to reach the target number in less than 10 seconds! And I go wow! He's so smart at maths.
My son turns to me and says
Because it's the little things that count.
A guy has a flat just outside of an insane asylum
He knows this and is nervous while changing the tire.
It doesn't help that one of the patients is watching him from the other side of the fence. The guy drops two of the lug nuts and can't find them. Starts to panic.
The patient speaks up: "Just tighten up the remaining two opposite from one another. Should last till you get to a gas station." The guy thinks about this, does so, and straightens up. "Pretty smart....uh, what are doing there ?" The patient replies "I'm here for being crazy, not being dumb."
The laborers digging the trench were getting fed up...
So one of them climbs out, walks over to the foreman, and asks "Why do we have to do all the work and you just watch us?"
The foreman walks over to a tree, places his open hand against it and says "I want you to hit my hand as hard as you can."
The digger winds up, launches the hardest punch he can muster, but the foreman pulls his hand away at the last second. "That's why!" the foreman gloats. "It's because you're s**... and I'm smart!"
The laborer climbs back down in the trench, and his buddy asks why the foreman doesn't have to dig. "Because he's smarter than us!" The buddy doesn't believe it. "Oh yeah? How do you know he's smarter?"
The first guy simply covers his face with his hand, and says "I want you to hit my hand as hard as you can."
A blonde and a brunette are watching the news...
A blonde and a brunette are watching the news, and they are showing a woman standing on top of a building contemplating s**.... The brunette says, "I'll bet you fifty dollars, that woman jumps and kills herself." The blonde accepts the bet. After a while the woman jumps and dies. The blonde pays the brunette fifty dollars. After some time the brunette feels bad and says, "I cheated. I saw that story on the news two hours earlier. Here is the fifty dollars you gave me." The blonde says, "So did I, but I figured she would be smart enough to not jump this time."
Smart-guy Bartender
An elderly man walks into a bar holding hands with a beautiful young woman. He is obviously a man of great wealth, as his watch is decked in diamonds and his suit is of Italian make.
As the pair sits down, the bartender says I'm sorry sir, but we don't serve minors here, nodding towards the woman.
The man retorts Now hold on just a minute. How would you know if she's a minor? You haven't even asked for her ID!
The bartender shrugs and says she's clearly a gold digger.
Peanut
One evening a man was at home watching TV and eating peanuts.
He'd toss them in the air, and then catch them in his mouth In the
middle of catching one, his wife asked him a question - and as he
turned to answer her, a peanut fell in his ear.
He tried and tried to dig it out but succeeded in only pushing it in deeper.
He called his wife for assistance, and after hours of trying they
became worried and decided to go to the hospital.
As they were ready to go out the door, their daughter came home
with her date. After being informed of the problem, their
daughter's date said he could get the peanut out..
The young man told the father to sit down, then proceeded to
shove two fingers up the father's nose and told him to blow hard.
When the father blew, the peanut flew out of his ear.
The mother and daughter jumped and yelled for joy. The young
man insisted that it was nothing.
Once he was gone, the mother turned to the father and said,
'That's so wonderful! Isn't he smart? What do you think he's going to be when
he grows older?'
The father replied, 'From the smell of his fingers, our son-in-law.
There were once these two blondes who were sitting around bored and alone one day.
They noticed an article in the paper where they were selling bird dogs.
Well they had heard that dogs make excellent companions so they went out to buy one.
They brought the dog home and fell instantly in love with him.
They had heard somewhere that bird dogs were smart and good at what they do.
So the two blondes decided to take the dog outside and watch him do what he is was so good at doing.
They tried it out a couple of times, but the blondes came off more disappointed than amazed at what the dog could do.
Finally one of the blondes was sick and tired of waiting, she suddenly shouted out: "THAT’S IT! We’ll give this dog one more chance. We’ll throw him up in the air one more time and if he doesn’t fly we’re taking him back to the STORE!"
While watching TV with his wife, a man tosses peanuts into the air and catches them in his mouth.
Just as he throws another peanut into the air, the front door opens, causing him to turn his head.
The peanut falls into his ear and gets stuck.
His daughter comes in with her date.
The man explains the situation, and the daughter's date says, "I can get the peanut out."
He tells the father to sit down, shoves two fingers into the father's nose, and tells him to blow hard.
The father blows, and the peanut flies out of his ear.
After the daughter takes her date to the kitchen for something to eat, the mother turns to the father and says, "Isn't he smart? I wonder what he plans to be."
The father says, "From the smell of his fingers, I'd say our son-in-law."