The Best 65 Smallest Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Smallest jokes. There are some smallest strongest jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these smallest width puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Smallest Jokes and Puns

What state has the smallest soft drinks?


Which state serves the smallest soft drinks?


Which is the smallest pub in the world?

The Thalidomide Arms.

Smallest joke, Which is the smallest pub in the world?

Looking for a joke about religious divisions...

I heard a joke a long time ago about two people who were in the same religion. and they go through the sub-parts of the religion- they're both christians, protestants, lutherans, same synod, etc... but when they get to the smallest possible division - they are in different ones and they get into a big fight, yelling at each other about being apostates. Anyone know how it goes?

What's the smallest drink you can order at a bar?

A mar tiny.

What's the smallest thing in the universe?

A pebble caught between the wrinkle of a flea's ball.

My favorite dinosaur

My favorite dinosaur is the Clitorous, its is the smallest of the dinosaurs, it is also hard to find because it likes to hide in the bushes

Credit goes to comedian Etta May.

Smallest joke, My favorite dinosaur

What's the smallest instrument in the world?

An e-lectron.

What's with American's obsession with everything bigger?

Bigger cars, bigger houses, higher IQs... If you ask me, Americans have the smallest penises in the world.

The smallest fortune teller went into a supermarket in Eastern Europe.

Now there's a minimum medium at a Maxima.

A joke my kid told me today.

Him: dad guess who is the smallest family in the world?
Me: I don't know, who?
Him: the atoms family.
Not bad for 7 years old.

You can explore smallest size reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean smallest length dad jokes. There are also smallest puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

What U.S. State has the smallest sodas?


What happens to the losers of the tv show The Biggest Loser?

They're made to feel like the smallest person in the world.

Wife asks god for a better husband

Wife: Dear God , I wish you could make my husband pay more attention to me, protect me, take me out, sleep close to me at night.
I wish he would be more caring even if I got the smallest of scratches.
God then turned her into a smartphone.

Which state has the smallest sodas?


The EU referendum

I liken the EU referendum to being in a pitch black room with two men in a mandatory rape scenario with both of them telling you theirs is the smallest.

Smallest joke, The EU referendum

French Priest

The killing of a priest in France is the smallest ever mass killing to have happened so far.

the main use of the tiny toe (the smallest toe in your foot)

is finding corners of furniture in the dark

A man's wife is showing off her new bikini at the beach....

"Do you notice the difference?" she said "I've lost a stone".

The man picks up the smallest pebble he can find and throws it into the water. "The beach has lost a stone. Do you notice the difference?"

What do you call the smallest Superman in the world?..

Quark Kent.

Why is cellphone reception so good in Wisconsin

Even the smallest towns have at least 4 bars

There was a documentary on TV about the world's smallest car.

I couldn't get into it.

Hey girl, are you a fire alarm?

'Cause you get triggered from the smallest of things

How are women similar to fireworks?

They're fun to watch from a distance, dangerous up close, and can be ignited by the smallest spark.

A physicist, engineer, and mathematician are asked by a local farmer to build the smallest fence they possibly can to hold in all of his sheep.

The physicist builds a big fence and slowly reduces the size until he can't reduce the fence any longer.

The engineer measures each sheep, stacks them in a specific way, and then builds a fence around them.

The mathematician builds a small fence around himself, then defines himself to be outside the fence.

An engineer, a mathmetician, and a physicist are hired by a farmer to build the smallest fence possible to hold all his sheep.

The physicist makes a large fence and gradually shrinks it over and over until he cannot shrink it any further.

The engineer stacks all the sheep in a specific way and builds a small fence around them.

The mathmetician builds a tiny fence around himself and then defines himself as outside the fence.

This person I know owns the world's smallest handcuffs!

He's wearing his wedding ring.

What's the smallest unit of time in the known universe?

The interval between the traffic light changing to green and the taxi driver behind you honking his horn.

The smallest Lannister

Q: What's the difference between Tyrion Lannister and Hillary Clinton's presidential campaign?

A: One is a cunning runt.

I've started calling the smallest of my three dogs 'grandma'

She has mini paws

I hate women who lie over the smallest things.

My girlfriend of 2 months told me she had a lot of abandonment issues. I looked it up online and that's not even a real magazine. So I packed my bags and left her.

which animal has the smallest genitals?

a peacock...

Did you hear about the world's smallest sailor?

He fell asleep on his watch.

Which is the smallest video sharing website?


My ex posted on facebook about the smallest man she's ever been with

And how she left him there on the spot, I thought it was hilarious, until I realised she was talking about me.

For like a week every month, my wife will make a big deal out of the smallest things

I think she's just ovary acting

What is the smallest developed country?

Which state sells the smallest cans of coke?


Which U.S state has the smallest soft drink


What does a Porsche 911 and the smallest possible forest have in common?

They're both 2 cedars (seaters).

There were three restaurants

There were three restaurants on the same block. One day one of them put up a sign which said "The Best Restaurant in the City."
The next day, the largest restaurant on the block put up a larger sign which said "The Best Restaurant in the World."

On the third day, the smallest restaurant put up a small sign which said "The Best Restaurant on this Block."

Too Soon: Verne Troyer, the actor who played Mini-Me, has passed

The world's smallest violin will be played at his memorial service.

Who is the smallest TV show host?

*Mike Rowe*

There are two kittens sitting on a steep roof. Which one falls off first?

the one with the smallest *mu*






**Preemptive explanation:**

Coefficient of friction. The coefficient of friction (COF), often symbolized by the Greek letter ยต (pronounced *mew*), is a dimensionless scalar value which describes the ratio of the force of friction between two bodies and the force pressing them together.

What is the smallest book in the world?

The book of Italian war hero's....

"Smallest snake I ever drew" said the tattoo artist.

You didn't say that when it was in your mouth.

Which actress has the smallest car?

Minnie Driver

Physicists at MIT have discovered the smallest possible unit of time

The time from meeting an alumnus to hearing I went to Harvard .

Women really do hold grudges over the smallest things...

My wife asked me to pass her the lip balm and I accidentally gave her a tube of super glue. It's been a week now and she's still not talking to me.

Why do I and the girl I lost my virginity to never argue?

Because the 1st root has the smallest possible argument

What do you call the smallest of a group of little people mothers?

The Minimum!

Anybody here heard of Molecules?

He's the smallest of the Greek heroes!

How tall is the world smallest grandmother?

One Nanameter.

You know the smallest things can get you fired, one time I got fired because I ripped up a crappy drawing I did

Boy am I never gonna be a tattoo artist again

Which US sate has the smallest soft drinks?


Why was the girl amazed at her ability to get pregnant from the world's smallest man?

Because she didn't know she had it in her.

A group of butts is walking. The smallest struggles to keep up.

Sorry, I'm a little behind.

My wife holds grudges over the smallest things. She asked me to pass her the lip balm, and by mistake, I gave her a tube of Super Glue.

Even after a few weeks, she's still not speaking to me

Which state serves the smallest drinks?

Mini soda

What do you call a cub at it's smallest point?

Bear minimum

What is the world's smallest book?

Job listings for philosophy majors.

I just read a novel that took place in the world's smallest graveyard

Honestly, it sucked. It didn't even have a plot.

132 is my favorite number

the sum of all 2-digit numbers one can make from 132 results in 132. 132 is the smallest number with that property.

that's cool.

But it's my favorite because the response I give to many people is 132 in binary and I communicate binary using my fingers.

What do you call the smallest mother?

The minimum

(Not OPs, but chuckled, heart = warm)

Three automobile managers at the urinal

The first goes to the sink and dries his hands with so many paper towels that not even the smallest droplet remains. "At Opel, we learn to be extremely thorough," he says.

The second uses only one towel for this and remarks: "At BMW, we also learn to be extremely efficient."

The third walks past the sink and says, "At Daimler, we don't piss all over our hands!"

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the smallest biggest jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working smallest tiny piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes