Sloth Jokes

42 sloth jokes and hilarious sloth puns to laugh out loud. Read animal jokes about sloth that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Laugh along with Sid the Sloth's birthday jokes, including his infamous one-liners about cobras, assailants, and Mufasa. Learn more about sloth humor and make your friends laugh with these hilarious jokes.

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Funniest Sloth Short Jokes

Short sloth jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sloth humour may include short sluggish jokes also.

  1. After making love to my wife last night, she told me I had a body built for sin 12 hours later, I still can't figure out if she meant Gluttony or Sloth
  2. I'm just okay during Pride Month. But just wait until Sloth Month. Or Gluttony Month. That's my time to shine.
  3. So a sloth got robbed by 3 turtles... When the cops asked him what happened the sloth said,
    It. all. happened. so. fast.
  4. A sloth was robbed by 2 turtles Sloth robbed by 2 turtles. Cop asks if he could describe the assailants. Sloth replies, "It all happened so fast."
  5. Why are sloths so fascinating? You'll almost always find one InTreeResting.
    .....I'll just see myself out.
  6. Sloth gets mugged A sloth gets mugged by three turtles. At the police station the cop asks him if he got a good look at the muggers. The sloth replies "I don't know, it all happened so fast".
  7. That poor sloth A sloth got robbed by three turtles.
    When the cops showed up to help him they asked, what did the turtles look like?
    The sloth said, I don't know, it all happened so fast!
  8. #17268 Three turtles robbed a sloth. When the police asked the sloth what happened, the sloth replied: I don't know, it all happened so fast.
  9. A sloth walks into a bar The bartender says you better order soon. Last call is in 3 hours
  10. Why did the sloths vote to keep the coal mines open? Because when it comes to energy they're conservative.

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Sloth One Liners

Which sloth one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sloth? I can suggest the ones about snail and laziness.

  1. What did Sloth say when he found gold? AU GUYS!!!
  2. My daughter made this tonight: What's the favourite song of sloths? Don't Hurry, Be Happy
  3. What do sloths and depressed people have in common? Both hang from the tree
  4. Why do we not eat sloths in the US? Because it's not a fast food
  5. You got gonorrhea from a sloth...? *slow clap*
  6. They say fast food is bad for you... so I ate a sloth.
  7. What do you call an intelligent sloth? Slo-mo sapiens
  8. what do you call a gay sloth? Slow-mosexual
  9. How did the sloth become President of the tree? He slept his way to the top.
  10. What is the name of Jay-Z's pet sloth? Lay-Z
  11. Who's a sloth's favorite rapper? Lay-Z
  12. They say I have a body built for Sin That sin being Sloth.
  13. I watched a gif of a sloth for 5 minutes yesterday Until I realized it was just an image
  14. You let a sloth give you gonnorhea?! *slow clap*
  15. Why is the sloth trying to cross the road? Becau- *SPLAT*

Sloth joke, Why is the sloth trying to cross the road?

Uproarious Sloth Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time

What funny jokes about sloth you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean sloppy jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make sloth pranks.

A sloth named Herman is walking through the forest one day.

A gang of snails approach him and beat him up. Herman is left at the bottom of a tree with several cuts and bruises. Several hours later he gathers up enough strength to go to a local police station. Herman walks into the Sergeant's office.
"What happened to you? the officer asks.
"A gang of snails beat me up," Herman replied.
"Can you describe what they looked like?"
"I don't know," the sloth says. "It all happened so fast."

A sloth walks into a bar

Well actually, I got ahead of myself, it's still walking there...
This is taking longer than I expected...
Never mind, I'll finish the joke when the sloth finally gets here.

A sloth goes to a bar to get drunk.

After a long time and a lot of drinks the bartender asks the sloth why he is there.
The sloth replies, "I'm depressed, my wife is leaving me. I bet she's already halfway through the kitchen."

A sloth was walking through the jungle one day when he was set upon by a gang of vicious snails.

The snails left him bleeding and confused at the bottom of a tree. Several hours later he summoned the strength to go to the police station and report the assault.
He was asked by the desk sergeant to describe his attackers. He replied, I don't know what they looked like, it all happened so fast.

What's the difference between a lazy overeater and a flirtatious emo?

One is Sloth the Gluttonous the other is Goth the Sluttiness.
Yep made that up on the way home today... Sorry.

Sloth joke, What's the difference between a lazy overeater and a flirtatious emo?

jokes about sloth