slippery Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious slippery puns

You can't put a price on slippery lemons.


I don't like sex in the shower.

It's slippery, dangerous and one of the worst things about prison.


Whats pink and always slippery?

A pink slipper


Don't have shower sex

It's a slippery slope that leads to bath things


98% of Canadians say "Oh shit!" on a slippery before going into the ditch.

*The other 2% are from Newfoundland and they say: "Hold my beer and watch this!"*

Merry christmas!

**Don't drink and drive this holiday.**


What do you call a horny asian woman?

Actually, I'm not going to finish that. It's a slippery slope.


Whats blue and slippery?

A blue slipper


I tripped on a "slippery when wet" sign today.

I was floored by the irony.


There is a guy who wakes up at 5 am and rides a bicycle until noon every weekend

There is a guy who wakes up at 5 am and rides a bicycle until noon every weekend. He does this no matter what - regardless of rain, snow, or thunder.

One day, however, the conditions are just too bad for him to ride his bike. There is a thick hail, brutal winds, and very slippery ice patches. Finally, after an hour, he decides to go home.

He lies down next to his wife, who is asleep and says: "The weather is terrible outside."

Half awake the wife replies: "And to think that my idiot husband is outside riding his bicycle."

(my 80 y old grandpa's joke)


What is a foot long and slippery?

A slipper


I like my women like I like my water

Wet and slippery on the floor.


My Vietnamese coworker slipped and fell in a puddle of oil.

I was going to make a racist joke about it but decided against it, because that's a slippery slope.


I think my niece has a burgeoning slip 'n slide addiction

Once you go down one, it's just a slippery slope.


The danger with online porn is that it's a slippery slope

First, you click one link. Then that leads you to another, then another, then another...

Then, before you know it, your pants are off, it's four hours later, and you're getting weird looks from everyone else in the library.


Clean floor

*A blonde woman had just finished sweeping the bathroom's floor when she went downstairs and heard her husband calling her again from the second floor.*

"Honey, the floor was so shiny I literally kissed it!"

"Really? Did I seriously do such a good job?"

"No, It's slippery as fuck!"


Northernlion's birth

When NL was being born, the doctor grabbed him, but NL was so slippery that the doctor dropped him to the floor. To the doctor's and his mother's surprise, NL did not cry. Instead, he sighed deeply and said:

"Dumb damage"


What's the most slippery country?

Greece. 😂

I'll see myself out.


I recently got very addicted to skiing

My doctor told me I'm going down a slippery slope


I went on a water slide once and now I'm addicted

It's a slippery slope


You shouldn't make racist jokes about Asians who cant drive when its raining

Its a slippery slope


On Blue's Clues, Steve didn't leave to go to college - he was sent to prison.

He realized far too late that he shouldn't have brought Slippery Soap with him.


What's red and slippery?

A slipper.


You've got to be careful once you start cooking with Crisco.

It's a slippery slope.


What was Bon Jovi buying at the hardware store?

Signs that read "slippery when wet."


What are the roads like in Greece?



What do you get when you graph mud versus traction?

a slippery slope


What's dry but slippery?

A slipper


Two clean jokes that start dirty.

What's brown and sticky?


What's a foot long and slippery?



What do you call a greased up Vietnamese man?

A slippery slope


What's warm, slippery and smells like bacon?

Kermit the frog's finger because of Ms. Piggy


What did the priest say to the child at the playgrounds?

Its a slippery slope.


Why was the battle of Bunker Hill so slippery?

Because the British were coming!


Why is crosswalk so slippery?

He's just crossed with life


This was written outside a ladies toilet

Slippery when wet.


What do people who don't like the slippery slope argument call it?

The slippery slope fallacy


What are the most funny Slippery jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Slippery? Well, here are the best Slippery dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Slippery pick up lines to share with friends.

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