Slam Jokes

Do you love great humor? Check out our collection of the best slam jokes sure to bring a laugh! From grand slam jokes to slam dunk puns, read on for a great mix of slam poetry based puns and more. Whether you're a winner or a looser, you won't be able to halt your laughter!

Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Slam Jokes

I'd rather have a laptop than an iPad.

At least you can slam it shut when your lady walks in.

How do you kill 50 flies in one hit?

Slam a Somalian child in the face with a shovel

Every time I bet I push the limits.

I tell the dealer, I want to put the dried grapes on the T-bones. Then I shout raisin the steaks, as I slam down more chips!

Sigmund Freud in a slam battle:

"Yo' mamma's so neglectful, you struggle to maintain relationships with women because they view you as overly attached and clingy."

jokes about slam

"I'm gonna treat you like I treat my homework"

"Oh, you're going to slam me on your desk and do me all night?"

"No, I'm going to stare at you and think there's so many better things I could be doing..."

my wife says she's leaving me for being to arrogant.

I said don't slam the door on your way back in.

Why was the prison poetry slam cancelled?

There were more cons than prose

Slam joke, Why was the prison poetry slam cancelled?

Why do NBA players like poultry?

Because they love to slam duck!

A really cute girl gave me her number the other day.

I need to unexpectedly slam on my brakes more often.

Picking people up

Strong people don't put others down. They pick them up and slam them on the ground for maximum damage.

I got into an argument with a girlfriend inside of a tent..

That's a bad place for an argument. Because then I tried to walk out and slam the flap.

You can explore slam halt reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean slam salesmen dad jokes. There are also slam puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Are you my homework?

Because I wanna slam you on my desk and do you all night.

I was recently in Belfast and saw a tourist attraction called "The Titanic Experience".

It's great. When you walk in the door they slam you in the face with a big chunk of ice.

What did Elsa say to Hodor?

Let it go, let it go; turn away and slam the door.

A son and his Dad have an intense argument and the son storms off, furious.

Before he gets out of earshot of his father, he yells "Jim Morrison was a terrible singer and an uninspired artist who never did anything worthwhile".

His father cannot believe this insolence, and screams at the top of his lungs "As long as you live in this house, you will never, EVER SLAM THE DOORS"

What's the difference between a Swedish jam band and slam dunking a baby?

One's a Swedish Phish and the other's a fetus swish

Slam joke, What's the difference between a Swedish jam band and slam dunking a baby?

Castration doesn't hurt at all

you just need to make sure your thumbs aren't between the bricks when you slam them together.

I got into a fight with my father when I told him Jim Morrison wasn't talented.

He forced me to go to my room. I slammed my door behind me, and my dad said, "Don't you ever slam The Doors in my house again!"

I wish people would stop acting like Chuck Norris is a god

If he really is so good why doesn't he teleport behind me and slam my head into the keyboard then hhjfdjusodbfhzoakcblkqoscsnjqpqkc

The Incredible Hulk became a muslim.

Now his new catchphrase is "i slam".

Whats the difference between affection and adore?

You can't slam your wife's head in affection.

I'll do you like my math homework

Slam you on the table, try to do you, but give up and pay someone to finish you

What's green and goes slam, slam, slam slam?

A four-door pickle.

I don't believe Chuck Norris is that great

Cuz if he was, he would show up right now, and slam my head all over my keasdhjaiosdcnhq09w8hjkoldq0i9 wdhj09qw daU9 10Q9WDJ09W3Q21JD QWD

Sometimes me and my friends get together to talk about chicks

It's a poultry slam.

What are battles between birds called?

Poultry Slam

Slam joke, What are battles between birds called?

I want to become a Christian pro wrestler and my name will be...

god slam it.

The air hostess has just told me if I don't put my phone away, she's going to slam my head into it.

But I'm pretty sure she's just jokiNjdk$48('$76)?;;

At 1:58 two young girls ran out in front of my car, so I slammed on my breaks and honked my horn. On the other side of the road behind the wheel was an African activist, who had to slam on his breaks to avoid hitting a pair of young girls as well.

Desmond Tutu tooted two too, at two to two.

Bob mixing up his 'N's and his 'D's was never really a problem...

Until his doctor told him to slam Advil for his headaches

What do you call a reptile that goes to a poetry slam?

A snapping turtle.

My mom said that if I don't get off the computer and do my homework she'll slam my head into the keyboard,

but I think she's jokinfreoiwjr67uiwosi94ckcjfkdald87lakdofasdkfj

A guy walks into a bar

And points to the top shelf and says to the bartender Give me ten shots of your most expensive whiskey .

Bartender pours the shots and watches as the guy proceeds to slam them all.

Bartender looks at the man and says That's an awful lot of liquor to put down in such short order.

Well my friend, you would do the same if you had what I have.

What do you have?

About $5

When we got married I could pull her lips apart...

Let 'em go, they would slam shut.

17 years later I can hold 'em shut, let 'em go and they flap wide-open!

My girlfriend left me because I'm too materialistic.

I said, "Don't slam the door on your way out.."

What the similarity between a screen door and a blonde?

The harder you slam them the looser they get.

A man and his daughter get into an intense arguement.

Finally the daughter can take it anymore and storms off to her room shouting "Jim Morrison is over rated" before angrily shutting her bedroom door.

Her father equally as angry yelled back "How many times do I have to tell you? In this house we dont slam The Doors."

How many orphans does it take to paint a house?

It depends on how hard you SLAM them against the walls

Me: Girlll! Im going to treat you like I treat my homework!

Girl: And how might that be?

Me: I'm going to slam you on the desk and do you all night long

I slammed my hand on my keyboard as hard as possible.

A bunch or letters showed up but not a single sound was made.

I guess I'm just the strong silent type.

My dyslexic support group held a slam poetry competition

Doug got first with a great piece about racial tensions in America.

Anna got second with a touching monologue about women's rights.

I got third by smashing an urn.

So I was having s**... with this woman...

I had her bent over her kitchen table, giving it to her good. When all of a sudden we heard a car door slam out front.

Oh god, she said, it's my husband. Quick, use the back door!

Well, I probably should have left at that point, but it's not an offer you get everyday...

My wife told me she'd slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer.

Don't worry guys, i think she's jokinejkodoworkfjcjkskoe394oo2oc2i2fkf2uu3ug25r2u

I slammed my hand in the door at the car rentals

It Hertz...

My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer

I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf

Apparently, I spend too much time on reddit

My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off. I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf

Are you my homework?

Because I want to slam you down on my desk. Try to do you for 5 minutes, give up, cry, and have my dad do you for me.

Two steaks walk into a bar, and slam the door behind them

Bartender say, you think you're tough? The bigger steak says, you just described me perfectly. Well done

Incredible Tennis statistic...

Novak is the first person to lose a Grand Slam after only missing two shots.

Have you heard the nickname for the Canadian that won the Slam Dunk competition?

They call him Sir Up now

My mom said that if I don't get off my computer and do my homework, she's gonna slam my head on the keyboard.

But I don't give a fuskhhkxkhdkhhskhd

My wife told me...

My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf

My mum said that if I don't get off Reddit now, she'll slam my head into the keyboard.

She wohdjdbwjqoksmdhdjdjdnksskpwldlk

I slammed €1,000 down on the bookies counter demanding to put it all on A2Z at 26/1

It was a real alpha bet.

(I don't care if it's terrible, I made myself laugh with it)

I love this time of year, the lead up to Christmas

When your partner walks into the room you can slam your laptop shut and you don't get any disgusted looks.

Remember that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes that make girls laugh. Many of the slam slam dunk puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When a joke goes too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke becomes inappropriate.

We suggest you to use only working slam grand slam piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and make them laugh.

Joko Jokes